Going Forward Amidst Tribulations

(Minghui.org) I started practicing Falun Dafa in 1995, and am now 57 years old. During my 28 years of cultivation, I have encountered various tribulations and tests along the way. Under Master’s compassionate protection, I persisted through all of them without any real danger.

I grew up in a poor family, and married a man who was 20 years older than me, despite my family’s strong objection. I worked diligently to raise our three children. My husband was short-tempered and erratic. We fought constantly, and I lost affection towards him.

Falun Dafa spread to my village when I was 29, and I started to cultivate right away. At that time, we only had the book Falun Gong. I enjoyed reading the book very much, but I did not know how to meditate. My legs were not level when I was sitting in the half lotus position, let alone in the full lotus position.

When Zhuan Falun was later published, I studied the Fa diligently, meditated, and cultivated. I gave up playing mahjong and other bad habits. I seized every free moment to practice the sitting meditation. I weighted my legs down with a bag of rice, and was able to meditate in the half lotus position. Through continuous Fa study and practice, I was finally able to meditate in the full lotus position in May 1996.

For three years, my husband created a lot of trouble for me. He often cursed at me, and was opposed to me studying the Fa. I endured it with tears, thinking that I paid such a big price to have him in my life, yet he still treated me like this. I thought I would not care if he died.

Master’s fashen enlightened me. I had a dream one day in which my husband died, and his spirit came to settle the debt with me. I shouted, “Master, please help me!” When I shouted this for the third time, a Daoist stood in front of me and said, “You owe him so much that if he dies, you cannot succeed in cultivation.” I begged Master to bring him back to life.

I woke up, and it was time for the morning exercises. I understood that I needed to repay my debt to my husband. From then on, I no longer held any resentment towards him, and he saw the changes in me. He knew it was Falun Dafa that changed me for the better.

Jiang Zemin launched the brutal persecution of Falun Dafa in July 1999, and dozens of practitioners from my area went to the provincial government to appeal for Falun Dafa. The police set up road checks and intercepted the practitioners. Only five of us made it to the provincial government. I returned home on the evening of July 20, and my husband didn’t ask me where I went.

Someone from the township government called me and another practitioner in the winter of 1999 for a meeting. I told myself that a test was in order. When we were brought there in the evening, I saw that more than ten other practitioners were there already. The mayor of the town said that Falun Gong (also called Falun Dafa) was a cult. They gave each of us a piece of paper to write a statement saying that we gave up our practice of Falun Gong. Those of us who refused to write the statement were illegally detained at the police station.

It was raining and cold, we sat there all night, and the county police from the 610 Office checked on us several times. The next day, the police chief interrogated us. He called me in and asked me three times, “Are you going to practice?” I replied three times, “I will absolutely practice.” The chief sent us to the county detention center for illegal detention.

That winter was bitterly cold, and they ordered me to take off my shoes and remain barefoot. My fellow practitioners and I persisted in memorizing the Fa and doing the exercises every day. We talked to the inmates about the Fa and the persecution. One inmate borrowed Hong Yin and memorized Master’s poems.

The Chinese New Year was approaching. My husband and fellow practitioners came to the police station to demand my release. The instructor from the police station led them to the detention center and called us out. The instructor said, “I’m letting you go home today on the condition that you will write a statement saying you will stop practicing Falun Gong.”

My husband knew that I would never change my mind, so he said, “You’re talking about writing the statement again. It’s New Year’s Eve, and the children are alone at home. She is locked in here exactly because of the statement, not because she broke any law.” The instructor had to let us leave.

My husband passed away in 2014. My grandson was born a few days later. When he was 14 months old, my son and his wife sent him to me so I could take care of him. When he was two years old, his maternal grandma took him for a couple of days, and I went out with several fellow practitioners to distribute truth-clarification pamphlets.

The first day went well. On the second day, however, someone reported me, and five police officers circled us.

Master’s poem came into my mind,

“What’s to Fear?Should you have fear,it will seize upon youIf thoughts are righteous,evil will collapseThe cultivator’s mindis loaded with FaSend righteous thoughts,and rotten demons explodeGods walk the earth,Validating the Fa”(“What’s to Fear,” Hong Yin II)

I wasn’t afraid. They seized my bag and took us to the county police station. They found truth clarification pamphlets, Dafa amulets, and a list of people who had agreed to quit the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) and its affiliated organization in the past two-days.

The police wanted me to tell them where I got the materials. I didn’t answer them directly. I said my grandson was with his maternal grandma today, so I had time to hand out pamphlets and tell people about the persecution of Falun Gong.

An officer asked me, “What do you tell them?” I said, “I talk to anyone I run into. If they are older than me, I address them as ‘big brother, big sister, auntie, or uncle, do you want to read about Falun Gong? Falun Gong is being persecuted, and the self-immolation on Tiananmen Square was staged.’ If they say yes, I give them one, otherwise I don’t.”

The officer took out a sheet of paper and said, “Sign it, and I’ll send you back to your village.” I said, “I want to see what’s written on it.”

It said something concerning “disturbing social order and distributing cult materials,” and “detention for 15 days.” I said, “Falun Gong is not a cult.” The officer said, “What is it then?” I said, “Falun Gong is a righteous practice.” He challenged me, “Do you dare to write what you said on this?” I wrote neatly on the sheet, “Falun Gong is not a cult. Falun Gong is a righteous practice.”

He took it and went to the 610 Office. Three hours later, he came back and told us to sign another paper, and said they would take us home after we signed it. I looked at it and saw that the wording “15 days” was changed to “13 days.” I refused to sign it. The officer said, “You have to sign it today no matter what.” I was determined not to sign it. Then someone else signed it for me. I said, “Your signature doesn’t count. It is not legal.”

We were illegally detained. I refused to cooperate during the detention; that is, I refused to wear their uniform or follow their commands in the field assembly. The guards told me to stand on the side and not to affect others. After the assembly, the practitioners and I did the Falun Gong exercises in the cell.

The director saw us doing the exercises one day. He held a metal rod in his hand and walked in with two inmates, roaring, “Who told you to do the exercises?!” I finished doing Exercise One regardless. They hit me on my left shoulder with the medal rod, and I heard a loud bone cracking sound. I said, “It’s against the law for police to hit people.” The director said, “Go sue me.” I said, “I will as soon as I get out.” He became quiet.

The director found me the next day. He said, “I have read Zhuan Falun. None of you are bad people, but this is my job.” He sounded regretful. From then on, no one bothered me if I did the exercises, memorized the Fa, or sent forth righteous thoughts. I clarified the truth and successfully persuaded several inmates to quit the CCP and its organizations.

A fellow practitioner and I were studying the Fa at another village in 2017, when suddenly the village Party secretary and several police officers broke in and took all of the Dafa books and Master’s portrait. They asked me, “Where are you from?” I said, “Nearby.” The village Party secretary said, “She’s not from my village.”

I told them which village and my name. The person in charge said, “It’s you again. If you studied Buddhism, no one would bother you.” I said, “I will continue practicing Falun Gong for the rest of my life!”

They wanted to take me and the fellow practitioners to the police station. I said, “We did not break any law; citizens have freedom of belief.” They said, “We want to go to your house and have a look.” They forced me and the fellow practitioners into the vehicle.

I asked Master to strengthen us, and we sent forth righteous thoughts in the vehicle all the way. When we arrived at my village, two officers went to the other practitioner’s house and two went to my house.

One officer started to search my house while the other was standing next to me. The first officer took two Dafa books, two copies of Minghui Weekly, and a copy of Master’s new article from my desk and held them in his hands.

I said, “Zhuan Falun guides my cultivation; I have to read it every day, you cannot take it!” The officer standing next to me said, “Forget it.” I immediately took back the two Dafa books from the other officers’ hands.

I asked them, “Would you like some water?” They said, “No. Let’s have a chat.” I then realized they had come here to listen to the truth. I told them that Falun Gong teaches people to cultivate their hearts and minds, to improve morality, to conduct themselves according to the standards of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance, and it has miraculous effects of healing and improving health.

I told them that Jiang Zemin was using them to persecute Falun Gong, and would kick them down the ladder one day. I also told them to raise the muzzle of the gun by one centimeter, and it will be good for them and their families. I talked the entire time. They listened and did not interrupt. When I finished, they left. My neighbor came and said, “I thought they were going to take you away again.”

I thought to myself, “Master has the say in everything. I am not good at clarifying the truth. I always teamed up with another practitioner and I was in charge of sending forth righteous thoughts, while she did the talking. I could do it by myself today because Master helped me.”

During my 28 years of cultivation, I experienced all kinds of tribulations and pain in the process of letting go of attachments. I passed some tests well, and some poorly. Compared to my fellow practitioners, I am still far behind. Going forward, I will be strict with myself, do the three things well, and remove all of my attachments.