Breaking Through Barriers with Master’s Protection

(Minghui.org) On May 20 this year, I turned on the music and was about to start practicing the exercises when my left leg started to hurt and lost all strength. I had to use my right leg to maintain my balance. I wondered, “Is it cancer?” This incorrect thought resulted in my suffering excruciating pain throughout my entire karma elimination process.

I recalled a dream I had two days earlier. My soul went to a place which had a small machine resembling that of a money counter. Cards were issuing out of the machine, like bank books. There were more than a dozen cards, each bearing the year, month, day, and other information on their surface. I happily exclaimed, “Why are there so many bank books when I didn’t save any money in the bank?” A voice from above replied, “This is the karma you have accumulated this year.”

I felt that I had been cultivating diligently all along, so I did not reflect further after waking up. Nor did I look inward to find out why I had accumulated so much karma. Thinking back, if I had searched within, asked Master for help, and sent powerful righteous thoughts, I might have avoided this tribulation. Even if my efforts could have partially dispelled this tribulation, it would have helped reduce the severity of the subsequent test.

No matter if it’s interference from the old forces or test of my character, I knew I had to face it with righteous thoughts. I persisted in doing the exercises, though the one-and-a-half-hour standing exercises felt as long as a year. I was tempted to squat down or lean against the wall multiple times, but refrained, as I was determined to break through this barrier and not drag out my situation. I kept reciting Master’s teachings,

“When it’s difficult to endure, you can endure it. When it’s impossible to do, you can do it.” (Lecture Nine, Zhuan Falun).

Although the pain in my leg eased a little, I remained unable to calm down.

At the start, I wanted to ask Master for help but soon gave up the idea. Master has endured a lot for practitioners and has left this little bit of karma for practitioners to use to improve our character. Would I still be considered a cultivator if I asked Master to bear it all? I was covered in sweat after finishing the exercises, as though I was expelling the karma I owed. My leg returned to normal after finishing the exercises and for the rest of the day, the pain did not recur. I knew Master was bearing the pain for me, allowing me to conduct my day-to-day activities and truth clarification work with ease. If Master had not endured the pain for me, I would not have been able to bear it, even though this was just a small portion of karma I owed in this lifetime.

Each night while doing the sitting meditation, my left leg would hurt with increasing intensity. I reminded myself, “You have to overcome level after level of tests, this is the norm in cultivation.” After meditating for two hours, my whole body would be soaked in sweat. As soon as I uncrossed my legs, the pain would vanish.

I usually go to sleep after sending forth righteous thoughts at midnight. But as soon as my body touched the bed, the feeling of pain instantly made me jump up. I told the entity, “You can cause me pain, but I draw the line when it affects my sleep since I have things to do tomorrow.” I fell asleep soon after without conscious knowledge of what position I had slept in. For more than two months, my sleep remained undisturbed though I could not tell you if I fell asleep sitting, leaning, or lying on my side. I knew this was because of Master’s blessing.

The next day my leg felt normal, and I thought I had successfully eliminated all my karma. Yet as soon as I started practicing the exercises, my left leg instantly began to tremble with greater severity than the day before. I squashed the impulsive thought of squatting or leaning while practicing the exercises, though I found the first set and fourth sets of exercises impossible to accomplish with my defective left leg. I had to lean on my right leg to complete the exercise movements.

For the first time in my life, I felt small and helpless. An ordinary person, not blessed with the protection of gods and Buddhas, has no hope of escaping any natural or man-made ordeals! Without Master’s protection, cultivators would also suffer the same fate. With newfound gratitude to Master, I resolved to work hard and save more sentient beings.

I reminded myself with Master’s teaching:

“When it’s difficult to endure, you can endure it.” (Lecture Nine, Zhuan Falun).

Although tears of gratitude welled up in my eyes, I told myself, “Don’t cry. The divine in heaven are watching your every move. You need to uphold the reputation of Dafa disciples. With a wonderful Master supporting you, you are truly the luckiest.”

This feeling of joy ignited my heart and spread life fire throughout my body at an indescribable speed until my physical pain vanished. Master bore my pain for me and after completing the exercises, my leg returned to normal.

I was supposed to go out and distribute truth clarification materials that morning. Yet after just a dozen steps, my leg began to hurt so badly that I was forced to stop. I had to squat or bend over at regular intervals to rest before resuming my journey. After a while, I reflected that these human behaviors were unacceptable for a cultivator. In order to hide my condition from others, I began walking slowly, maintaining my pace and a calm temperament.

Throughout my journey, I sought Master’s blessings and took extra care with every step. No one, including my neighbors, family members, relatives, and fellow practitioners, suspected my condition was different from usual. Moreover, my leg would quickly recover to its normal state whenever I went out to save sentient beings, allowing me to complete my work without interruption.

Once, after finishing truth clarification work, I had to visit a relative’s home to help a fellow practitioner with a cultivation-related chore. I took a bus and after getting off, slowly walked the long distance to the relative’s place. I had barely walked a dozen steps when, a man in his eighties drew up beside me and commented, “Young lady, why are you walking slower than me?” Even before I finished replying, “This is just temporary,” I found myself left behind in the elder’s wake. After completing the chore and returning home, I studied the Fa and started looking inward to find the gaps the old forces had seized.

With Master’s help, I recalled the things I had done this past year and identified many attachments.

1. Selfish Thoughts

One day in July last year, I was riding the bus home after distributing truth clarification materials when someone behind me spoke up, “Close the window, it’s so cold.” I happened to be sitting by an open window, and although it was raining heavily, I was sweating profusely and felt very hot. Since the speaker did not address me directly, I ignored this comment and left the window open. I fell asleep soon after and found my left leg unresponsive when I attempted to get off the bus at my stop. After asking Master for help, I was able to move my leg and get off the bus.

After returning home, I searched inward and realized my condition had been caused by my selfishness. As Dafa practitioners, we should be considerate. However, despite cultivating for so long, I failed to be considerate. Unsurprisingly the old forces took advantage of this gap. For nearly a month afterward, I suffered from frequent bouts of lower limb leg pain. Unbearable pain would strike frequently in both legs, anywhere from a few seconds to a few minutes. Yet the pain would stop as soon as I left home, and this condition did not affect my ability to save sentient beings.

As the symptoms were mild and manageable, I neglected to look further inward and send forth righteous thoughts. Afterwards, although my legs stopped hurting, my knees remained slightly stiff. As it did not affect my ability to do truth clarification work, I believed this small amount of karma would disappear as I continued to make progress. Now I understand that selfishness can give rise to many human attachments, including complacency.

2. Lack of Compassion

Last June, many practitioners in our city were illegally kidnapped by the CCP. One practitioner narrowly escaped the net, and a month after the incident, I thought this practitioner should come out of hiding and resume regular cultivation activities. At the start of July, I sent a letter to this practitioner, writing down what I had observed, pointing out problem areas and advised the practitioner to look inward. The practitioner subsequently replied, “Who are you to determine that I haven’t looked inward?” and so on. At that time, I really should have examined myself for the reason behind this practitioner’s reaction. A failing on my part would have triggered the practitioner to react like that, but I ignored this point and even defended my actions as, “being responsible to fellow practitioners. I have a responsibility to point out your shortcomings.” I was too self-righteous and bore human emotion toward fellow practitioners. I’ve come to realize this sentimentality should be cultivated away.

Driven by human nature and feelings, I sent a second letter to this fellow practitioner a month later, pointing out several issues more clearly and sharply. I never stopped to consider the difficulties she faced, nor did I treat her with compassion. Here I would like to say, “I’m sorry” to this fellow practitioner.

Master has made it very clear that improvement and elevation in levels are not achieved through mutual accusations, but through studying the Fa and looking inward. I had failed to follow this important lesson.

3. An Arrogant Mentality

I once dreamed I was climbing a steep gray mountain. The climb was arduous, and I woke up in a cold sweat just before reaching the mountain peak. This dream made me realize I had many attachments that had caused my karma to pile up like a mountain.

For the longest time, I believed that I excelled in holding the law wheel and sitting in meditation, because I remained comfortable while practicing these exercises. Yet pride in my outstanding achievement was a sign of arrogance, while believing the exercises to be “comfortable” was a significant manifestation of human nature. At best, this was showing disrespect to the Fa and at worst blasphemy against it, since the Fa should not be perceived with human notions.

After practicing, I found myself able to sleep comfortably, falling asleep within seconds of hitting the bed. Master would eliminate my karma for me in my sleep, so I hardly felt anything. My soul would leave my body and return when I got up for morning exercises. Gradually, my curiosity over this phenomenon evolved into arrogance about my “ability”.

While in the midst of eliminating karma in July last year, I said to fellow practitioners, “Nothing, whether my own or family matters, has deterred me from saving sentient beings. I have been consistently and diligently cultivating.” The old forces seized my attachment and made my leg hurt, making it physically difficult for me to move forward.

I have realized that one should never be over confident, since this attitude lacks humility and even presents a certain level of arrogance. This mentality is incompatible with the standard required of a Dafa practitioner and is grounds for manipulation by the old forces.

The old forces wanted to take advantage of my weakness by hurting my leg. By disrupting my normal sleep and interfering in my ability to walk and save sentient beings, they were trying to force me to give up cultivation. How could I still consider myself a Dafa practitioner if I failed to do what was necessary?

4. Different Mental States

A fellow practitioner previously asked me, “Aren’t you afraid?” I replied, “I’ve never wondered if I was afraid or not.” While my answer was not wrong, it was also not honest, since subconsciously I feared trouble from the old forces. For example, after a fellow practitioner was kidnapped last year, I dared not slack off from fear that something similar might befall me. Although “not slacking off” and “not daring to slack off” sound similar, they actually embody different states. Fellow practitioners who do not slack off meet the standards of the Fa, while those who do not dare to slack off are motivated by fear.

My left leg continued to hurt over a period of nine days. On the third day, I was so scared of the pain that I skipped the second set of exercises that required holding the law wheel, and practiced the first, third, and fourth sets of exercises for two hours. After completing the exercises, I regretted not doing the second set. After all, one has to endure what is owed instead of avoiding it. To make up for the missing set, I practiced holding the wheel five times that day for a total of five hours. After each set, I would kneel before Master’s portrait to thank Master for his blessings.

Before cultivating Falun Dafa, I suffered from heart disease and rheumatic arthritis. Master removed these illnesses soon after I began practicing, and I barely had to endure anything in return. I was determined to endure only that which was owed and reject anything else imposed by the old forces. Whenever my legs started hurting after a while of walking, I would stop and pray to Master in my heart. “Master, please help me. Stop my leg from hurting when I go out to save sentient beings. Instead, I am willing to suffer the pain at night when it is time to sleep.” The pain would stop, allowing me to travel up and down stairs while doing truth clarification work.

I spent more time sending forth righteous thoughts at the four set times, and after several days, the severe pain began to dissipate. I saw significant improvement in my leg condition. I was able to stretch, relax, and squat using my left leg.

After one month, I was able to stand on both legs. A few days later, Master began to purify my right leg. I was forced to rely on my left leg while practicing the exercises, but this time round the pain in my right leg was completely bearable.

With Master’s blessing, I eliminated my karma with peace of mind and without entertaining the notion of “human illness.” During this period, while discussing my condition with other practitioners, one of them suggested I suffered from a nerve condition. I replied, “That’s not true. Ordinary people may have nerve conditions, but I am a cultivator. This is the process of eliminating karma and overcoming tests.” I remember unconsciously sighing to myself on two separate occasions at the start of my tribulation, though I instantly reminded myself, “You have to uphold the standards of a Dafa disciple.”

While sharing with other practitioners, I learned that some now just focus on studying the Fa, practicing the exercises, and sending forth righteous thoughts at home. They no longer actively participate in truth clarification activities. There is nothing wrong with studying the Fa, since this is the foundation of cultivation. Upon understanding the principles of the Fa, one will come to understand the unquestionable importance of saving sentient beings during the Fa-rectification period.

The Fa is used to guide one’s thoughts, words, and deeds, ensure compliance with the principles of the universe and enable one to complete one’s mission during the Fa-rectification period. This is the true goal of Fa study. Those on the right path will be able to overcome difficulties easily.