I Have Been Through a Lot, but Have No Regrets
(Minghui.org) I used to be very short-tempered. After I got married, I realized that my husband was the same. Moreover, he only cared about enjoying himself and wasn't responsible for our family at all. We therefore had frequent arguments.
Miserable Family Life Was on the Brink of Ending
After our child was born, I needed my husband's help to take care of him, yet my husband always ignored me and did what he wanted. So when our child was sick, I took care of him by myself. This upset me greatly, and our family quarrels easily ignited into battles.
Seeing me like this, he became even worse. He often went straight from work to places like bars or to play Mahjong and stayed overnight.
I felt very wronged and was supporting the family by myself. I thought to myself, “How will this end?”
When I could no longer endure the pain, I went to see my mother-in-law to complain about my husband. Unexpectedly, she took his side and ended up criticizing me. I talked back right away. In my eyes, they were both my enemies; they were targets for me to vent my anger.
When I was 37 years old, I went to a fortuneteller to see what he had to say about my fate, as I was seeking a divorce. He told me that I'd see the outcome very soon. This made me very happy, thinking that my days of pain were finally coming to an end!
Dafa Saved My Family from Breaking Up
It turned out that I didn't seek a divorce because I was fortunate enough to obtain Falun Dafa. After I finished watching Master Li's nine lectures [Master Li Hongzhi is the founder of Falun Dafa], many questions I had about life were answered. It came down to the fact that their mistreating me was due to my predestined relationships with them from before. These were debts that I had to pay back.
Through Fa study, I came to understand the profoundness of the Buddha Fa, why some people were rich and others were poor, and how to properly lead my life going forward. With the elevation of my realm through continuous Fa-study and doing the exercises, my attitude toward my husband and his mother changed.
When they treated me badly, I could now control myself by letting go of anger and looking inward instead of becoming angry. Meanwhile, my body went through tremendous transformations. For example, my illnesses, including headaches, stomachaches, herniated disc, and gynecological inflammation, all vanished. My hands used to always be very cold, and now they were warm. During the time when Master was cleansing my body, I could feel the Falun (law wheel) spinning in my hands, head, and lower abdomen. After I was illness-free, I became more lighthearted. I felt that I was immersed in the joy of Master's saving grace every day.
I stopped hating my husband and mother-in-law, and I forgot all about divorcing him. I was very cheerful every day and became very energetic. When they both saw me like that, they couldn't understand it, and said, “Is Falun Dafa indeed so miraculous? Why is she so much nicer? She had such a bad temper before, how did she change herself that quickly?”
They didn't understand how wonderful the Buddha Fa is or the mindset of people after they obtain the Fa. Of course, they were caught off guard by my becoming tolerant and compassionate.
One day, another practitioner and I went out to deliver Master's new articles. I came home late. My husband saw that the meal was not prepared, and he was a bit hungry. So he became very upset and began cursing at me. If this had happened before I started practicing Falun Dafa, I would have stopped cooking.
This time, as our Master told us: “You did not hit back or swear back.” (Lecture in Sydney)
I understood that practitioners should be noble. That's one example of how we are different from everyday people. I said to him with a smile on my face, “I'll do it right away. Take it easy.” Then he was fine.
Every time I passed a trial or tribulation, I felt the happiness of my xinxing being elevated. Whenever I made a breakthrough, I felt the same way. No loss, no gain. Dafa's principles have been helping me to gain more and more understandings.
Husband Enters Dafa Cultivation
My transformations had a great impact on my husband. He was trying to understand why I changed, so he began to read Zhuan Falun when I wasn't around. He consequently quit smoking (he had smoked for more than 30 years). Seeing the changes in me, my mother-in-law also began Falun Dafa cultivation. Our entire family was immersed in the Buddha Fa's saving grace.
Persevering Amidst the Persecution
The persecution soon began, on July 20, 1999, and swept over the entire country. Out of fear, my husband stopped cultivating. Though I had been practicing diligently, when I saw the fabricated propaganda on TV that defamed Dafa, I was also very scared. Some people whose minds were poisoned by the propaganda were against us and began to attack us. People gave us weird looks and said all kinds of sarcastic things about us.
Someone challenged me, “Do you still practice? You guys have gotten into politics. You besieged the Chinese government compound.”
I replied, “This is all about the propaganda on TV. Since we are familiar with each other, what would you say about me? Have I gotten better or worse? Would you rather believe the fabricated lies from the Chinese Communist Party (CCP)? Please think it over.”
He replied, “Yes, you are right.”
I didn’t yield during the time when the persecution was most rampant and severe. I went to my company to clarify the facts to people. They all showed their sympathy towards me by giving me their support. Some were very concerned about me and said, “Be careful. The CCP is evil. Don't let them harm you.”
Back then, two practitioners and I went to Beijing to appeal to the government for justice for Falun Gong. We ended up being thrown into a detention center. We were then transferred to a forced labor camp and illegally detained. It was a very difficult time for me.
After I was released, the local authorities attempted to transform me. For example, one day some officers from the 610 Office and local police station came and asked that I attend a so-called “welcome” session. Two days later, they brought together a few practitioners into a large conference room.
One of their personnel was video recording the session. They had everyone declare their stance toward Falun Gong in front of the camera. When it came to my turn, I wasn't nervous at all. I looked around the meeting room and said calmly, “All of you are from my hometown, and you are all my friends. I have to speak the truth, correct?”
The head of the 610 Office nodded his head.
I then said, “I am close to 40 years old. I had a few illnesses a few years ago, headaches, stomachaches, and felt tired every day. Yet, it was only after I began to study Zhuan Falun that all my illnesses were healed, honestly!”
I was speaking very calmly, but I could feel that everyone was listening to me.
I continued, “These miraculous changes made me steadfast in my belief of Dafa. And that's all I want to say to you.” I then wrapped up my speech.
Right then, I received warm applause. The person holding the camera put it down on the floor. They stopped this attempt to transform me.
I was persecuted numerous times during the years that followed. Officers from the police station came to harass me, and I was once seized and taken to a brainwashing center. But no matter how difficult it was, I remained steadfast in my belief.
When I arrived at work one day, my manager said that I had made their situation difficult by holding onto my practice, so they had to dismiss me. I replied, “Last year, when the police officers came to work to harass me, you didn't dare to confront them at all. If I had disappeared then, how would you have told my family?”
I then added, “I am your employee. Are you responsible to me at all? If you spoke up for me and said I was a good employee, would they dare to do anything they wanted? You did not protect your employees last time, and now you have even kicked me out of the company. No one has the right to do that.”
My words, full of righteousness, had a big impact on him. He quickly whispered to me, “I'll try to reverse it.” The CCP committee secretary at our company also said, “Take it easy. We'll do our best. You can just go home and wait to hear from us.” They then saw me off at the door.
With this thought, I knew I shouldn't have been dismissed like that. What's wrong with practicing Dafa? I went back to my company again to clarify the facts to whomever I ran into. In the end, I managed to return work shortly after.
During my years of cultivation the path has been a bit bumpy. Yet, regardless of the difficulty, I have tried to continually elevate myself with Fa-study and cultivation.
My family environment has consequently changed for the better. My husband went from being scared of the CCP, to becoming supportive of Dafa. He also encouraged his relatives and friends to cultivate. He sometimes assisted me in doing Dafa work. My child also sometimes went with me to distribute Dafa informational materials.
Though I have been persecuted for many years, I never felt regret for practicing Falun Dafa. And I am not afraid to take on any kind of hardship. I truly came to feel, “Falun Dafa is very beneficial to people and for whoever believes in it.”