China Fahui｜Believing in Master and the Fa, My Husband Passed a Test of Life and Death
My Husband's Sickness Tribulations
My husband started to choke while he was in bed in March 2017 and couldn't breathe. He sincerely said to Master: “Master, please help me breathe even though I was not diligent in cultivation.” Immediately, he could catch his breath. Master saved his life in that critical moment. Both of us thought this happened because his body was being cleansed and that it would pass quickly. He didn't look within for any attachments and didn't send righteous thoughts to clear out the bad elements.
Master gave me a hint, and I remembered the story about Buddha Sakyamuni telling his disciple to clean the bathtub. I knew we should stay unmoved under all circumstances. I saw in another dimension that many centipedes and insects that I had stepped on and killed had stuck to the soles of my shoes. I couldn't figure out what that meant.
Several days later, my husband became out of breath and didn't have much strength in his legs. He didn't worry because he could still eat and sleep. One day, I saw that his feet were swollen and then discovered that his legs and belly were swollen as well. I realized it was serious, so we started sending righteous thoughts intensively every day.
Thinking that something must be wrong with me when such incidents happened to my husband, I looked within. Since I am a coordinator for our local practitioners, I was busy with Dafa projects. My husband did all the housework, including buying clothes and household necessities for me. He cooked three meals a day and looked after the finances. I had never been to the bank. He also helped me browse the Minghui website and clarify the truth to people. He managed the household, so the old forces took advantage of my reliance on him. By persecuting him, I was unable to focus on doing Dafa projects.
The next day, I had him study the Fa while I did all the household chores. I asked my son to order lunch for us online. We ate a simple breakfast and dinner. I didn't think the old forces could upset us, but I didn't realize that we hadn't dissolved them.
Denying Old Force Arrangements
One day, I saw in another dimension that, as my husband was sailing a boat, he flew into the air. He landed on a platform and stopped briefly before flying higher and higher until he disappeared. He dropped a purple cloth on the ground, which I reckoned was his human skin. I took it to mean that he was no longer in this world. At that moment, another me appeared, who was now a widow.
Back in reality, my husband's whole body was swollen, and his breathing was labored. Together, we sent righteous thoughts and studied the Fa for three hours. I did some Dafa work during the day and talked with people about the goodness of Dafa on my mobile phone from 7 p.m to 10 p.m. Then we listened to one of Master's lectures for a while and sent righteous thoughts for 45 minutes.
I came to my room after midnight and recited the Fa. I looked within for any attachments I could find. In the meantime, I was vigilant about my husband. I would go to his room if I couldn't hear him. I felt he could die at any minute because he was unable to breathe.
I was not confident that he could pass this test even though he was studying the Fa more seriously now. I always urged him to look within but didn't know whether he had or not. He dreamed a lot at night and was asked many questions in the dreams. When he shared his answers with me, I didn't think he answered from the Fa’s perspective and had failed the tests. The swelling worsened. He didn't know what to do. He said, “How can I stay clearheaded in my dreams?”
The wicked demons and rotten spirits put all kinds of thoughts into my mind and made false images for me. One day, while I was hanging the washing on the balcony, a voice said to me, “Nobody will take in your clothes even if you leave them out for a month. You often come home late at night. Your house is cold, and nobody will give you any hot water to drink.”
I saw a scene in which we were at my husband's funeral and that a thank-you letter my son and I wrote was posted at his workplace.
After this, the terrible scene of losing my husband flashed through my mind constantly. I was overwhelmed with sadness. I vacillated between two scenarios: in one, I had lost my husband; in another, I was about to lose my husband. I was frantic.
One day, I heard Master calling my name. He said, “You are too selfish and only think of yourself. Hurry up and help your husband pass this test.”
I awakened and thought, “Why should I be controlled by the old forces? My husband is still alive. What was happening was arranged by the old forces a long time ago. I was always afraid of losing him in the past, especially when he was undergoing tribulations. The old forces took advantage of my loophole. I was actually cooperating with the old forces to make the persecution worse!”
“We negate even the very emergence of the old forces and everything that they've arranged; we don't even acknowledge their existence.” (“Teaching the Fa at the 2004 Chicago Conference” from Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. IV)
So these scenes were false images. I sent righteous thoughts to eliminate them.
My husband and I came to the same realizations: We would rectify our shortcomings, and the old forces were not qualified to test us. Master looks after us. I said to the old forces, “If you are persecuting my husband, that is the same as persecuting me. We are one body. He has contributed to half of the work I have done. I will eliminate whoever persecutes him.”
One night, when he could barely breathe, he felt a cool breeze blow on his heart, and then he could breathe again. Master had saved him for the second time.
The swelling in his body fluctuated. Sometimes it got better and sometimes, worse. My husband had relapses now and then.
I experienced excruciating pain in one leg for no discernible reason. My vision became blurry. I saw in another dimension that dark clouds had gathered above our house. The wicked demons and rotten spirits came in groups, one after another. I sent righteous thoughts for a long time and felt there was no energy in my dantian area. I felt pain in my lower back and could not keep myself upright. The old forces seemed to want to harm us.
My husband insisted he wouldn't go to the hospital. He said, “If I can't recover by cultivating in Dafa, the doctors definitely have no way to cure me.”
His feet were so swollen that he couldn't wear shoes. His face was disfigured, and his upper body was enlarged. He could barely breathe. I felt that he could leave me at any moment.
I didn't know the password for our bank accounts or the computer. I didn't ask him for them because I didn't want to stress him. Instead, he gave me our bank term deposits and told me the passwords. I just put them aside and thought it was not important at this stage.
I sent righteous thoughts to eliminate the evil all night. But dark clouds still covered our dimensional field, while ugly demons and rotten spirits laughed at us.
One night I sent righteous thoughts until 5 a.m. I asked Master if he could send heavenly soldiers to help me because I was not able to keep fighting the demons. Suddenly our dimensional fields became bright and clear. But the next day the demons were back. I didn't eat or sleep, nor did I feel hungry or sleepy. During this tribulation, I lost 13 pounds (6 kg).
“... even though the pressure you face is great when the hardships come at you earlier than they would have, and the tests of your xinxing are tough to pass—and sometimes the tests may be huge—when all is said and done, those hardships are all things you need to overcome, they are accounts you need to settle, tabs that you need to pay. (Audience laughs) Aren't they great things, then? So whether it is good things or bad things you run into, so long as you cultivate in Dafa, they are all positive, to be sure. (Teaching the Fa in San Francisco, 2005)
Master also said:
“But anyone who can’t advance through a gateway or whose energy won’t descend should examine their character for the cause and consider whether they’ve stalled at a certain stage for too long and not done the inner, spiritual work that they should.” (The Sixth Talk, Zhuan Falun)
Since Master said that they were great things, our tribulations must be great things.
I looked further for my attachments and found that I resented my husband. I had resented him and other people deep down in my heart for a long time. I let go of most of it after I studied the Fa diligently, but I wasn't able to get rid of my resentment for my husband. I knew that I couldn't bring it with me to Heaven and must let it go. But now that the old wound had been reopened, I would get furious and speak harshly to him. I would do anything to triumph over him.
I recited the Fa every night and gradually let go of my resentment for him. Actually, he was a very good person. My other relatives lived far away in other provinces. He was the only family I had here. We weathered life's storms together and helped each other through tribulations.
I was detained in a forced labor camp for three years. I was only allowed to see my family twice a month. He came every time and didn't miss a single visit. Sometimes he was not allowed to see me, but he still came. He was honest, righteous, and had a pleasant temperament. He was a good husband. I would feel terrible if he passed away before me. If Master gave me the opportunity to make it up, I would definitely dig out the root of my resentment for my husband.
He had served in the military in a remote area for 18 years and contracted many health problems. He worked hard after he was transferred to a civil department.
My husband began practicing Falun Dafa in 1996 and recovered from all of his ailments. He no longer suffered from asthma, high blood pressure, high altitude heart disease, severe diabetes, and large areas of dermatitis.
He was nearly 80 now. The old forces tried to drag him down during the last leg of the Fa-rectification period. I totally dissolved my hatred for him. My compassion emerged. I changed my notions and behavior after that. Before, I didn't eat his leftover food or wash his socks. I no longer think he is dirty. I didn't lose my temper with him. He looked perfectly okay to me now. I became calm and quiet. Master helped me get rid of my hatred.
Previously, I had thought that my husband was like a new practitioner because his understanding of the Fa was pretty shallow. Though he did some Dafa work, practiced the exercises, and sent righteous thoughts, he didn't really understand the Fa and didn't look within. We never shared our insights with each other. I told him that he was not cultivating but only meddling. He once said to me, “I am not jealous of you. Why do you watch over me so closely?” We couldn't really talk to each other. We studied the Fa separately.
Now we study the Fa together and read sharing articles on the Minghui website. When he shared with me how he looked within, I didn't think he knew how to do it properly.
When I went to Beijing to appeal for justice for Falun Dafa on July 20, 1999, he supported me wholeheartedly. He bought the plane ticket for me and gave me money to cover expenses.
He didn't go to Beijing because he was afraid that they couldn't do without him at work. He eventually told me that he resented me even though he had often said that he didn't. Actually, he was full of anger toward me. He didn't think he had done anything wrong.
I told him how I looked within and the insights I gained from doing that. I said to him, “You have to look within from the Fa’s perspective and measure yourself against the Fa principles. You are a Dafa practitioner. When Dafa and Master were persecuted, you didn't step up. It is far from enough that you supported me in validating Dafa. In addition, you shouldn't worry too much about the specifics of who was right and who was wrong. You should check your thoughts. If you find a human attachment, you shouldn't regard it as your own thought. You should send righteous thoughts to eliminate it.”
For the first time, we shared openly and calmly. We came to know each other better, and my husband learned how to look within.
He worked in the military for 18 years and had been a leader in civilian companies. He was strongly indoctrinated with Chinese Communist Party (CCP) culture. Though he had practiced Falun Dafa for many years, many of his notions and thoughts were still influenced by CCP culture. He sent righteous thoughts intensively every day and listened to the audio of Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party, including the sections Disintegrating Communist Party Culture and Talking about Party Culture. He watched two videos of Master’s lecture in Guangzhou. He recited the Fa at night and checked his thoughts according to Fa principles.
“Nobody will dare to rashly do anything to you as long as your practice stays on track. And besides, you have the protection of my spiritual bodies. So no harm will come to you.” (The Third Talk, Zhuan Falun)
I said to him, “You should be all right! You are cultivating diligently. Master will not give up on you. Master will surely protect you.”
Believing in Master
My husband's body was still swollen and became worse. I sent righteous thoughts for him all night, looked within, and recited the Fa. Master also reminded me to maintain my xinxing, which reinforced my confidence and belief that this tribulation would soon be over. But the next day I didn't see any sign that he was better. I couldn't think of anything else I could do to help him.
At our children's request, my husband went to the hospital. Five days later, his swelling was gone, and he could breathe normally. The doctor was surprised to find that one thin vein feeding his heart wasn't blocked and didn't understand why his body had become so swollen. He stayed in the hospital for seven days but didn't take any of the prescribed medications. We returned to our old house.
One day, he came in from outside and said, “Just now I felt stiffness from my neck to my lower abdomen and was about to fall down. I immediately called to Master for help and repeated the verses for righteous thoughts. I returned to normal.” In this crucial moment, Master saved him for the third time.
My xinxing became steady after I studied the Fa intensively for a whole month. I knew that the doctors hadn't cured him; they'd only treated the edema. He could still be in danger at any time. His body was hurt greatly in this treatment. He said that his belly became swollen again. I told him that it was a good thing and we should maintain our xinxing and do what we should do.
Our son helped to renovate the kitchen and bathroom and installed a new heater two months after my husband was discharged from the hospital. So we moved back to the newer house after the weather turned cold. One night, two older people who lived downstairs knocked at our door and told us that water had leaked into their apartment. I assured them that we would get it fixed. I notified the serviceman the next day and had it fixed within a month.
During this time my husband had edema in his whole body, including his private parts.
“So as Dafa disciples you should just firm up your righteous thoughts, and do well with what you need to do. If you can manage to really do well in all three regards, nobody will dare to touch you.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2015 West Coast Fa Conference”)
We didn't slack off in doing the three things. Our hearts didn't move because of the edema. We knew it was a good thing. It was a false image, and we should eliminate it.
Our children asked a top heart specialist in our province to review all the tests my husband had in the hospital. He confirmed that my husband suffered from level 4 heart failure, which was the most severe stage. There was no treatment. The only thing that could be done was to reduce the edema. The specialist gave my husband a death sentence. Now, only Falun Dafa and Master could save him. Several practitioners who had the same problem as my husband had passed away. If the swelling continued, could he be saved?
That night, I recited “What I Do for Learners” in the Third Talk of Zhuan Falun again and was able to finish it without error, for the first time. Master talked about four stories. I realized that Master is omnipotent. That practitioner in Changchun had survived being hit by a steel pole falling off a scaffold. Master saved him with his power.
Master is beside us and looking after us all the time. Master had saved my husband three times at critical moments. I should wholeheartedly believe in Master. Things would turn around when they got to the extreme. There must be factors that we needed to improve and attachments we should let go of.
Local Practitioners Improved As a Whole, and My Husband Recovered
I no longer forced my husband to look within. We realized that we actually acknowledged the arrangements of the old forces if I forced him to do that. Master takes care of him. He would improve himself from the Fa’s perspective. Master told us several times that the practitioners who started to practice Falun Dafa before July 20, 1999, had been pushed to their respective positions and are now helping Master rectify the Fa and save sentient beings. Master hadn't arranged any big sickness tribulations for us. The edema in my husband's body was a false image perpetrated by the old forces. We should remove it and eliminate it.
I hadn't told other practitioners about the tribulations my husband was going through. I realized that we should improve with other practitioners and rely on the power of the whole body. Several practitioners came to our home to send righteous thoughts for my husband. Their compassionate righteous fields dissolved the evil in other dimensions. This reinforced my husband's righteous thoughts, and we believed that he would pass the test of life and death.
One day, I heard him talking with our son, who wanted my husband to go to the hospital. My husband told him that he would act according to a practitioner's standard. Our son was worried about the edema. My husband said that the swelling would disappear once his xinxing was up to par.
Several days later, the person who lived on the first floor knocked on our door urgently. He said that water was pouring into his bathroom and master bedroom, and he thought it was caused by the renovation we had done. He was a bit harsh because he worried that we would disagree with him because we lived on the third floor and were not affected.
I assured him that we would work together to fix the problem regardless of whether it was our problem or not. The service team came the next day and found that the water pipe on the second floor leaked because it was so old. The building manager said that we hadn't caused the leak. We would have dismissed the problem if we weren't practitioners. Initially, in order to find the cause of the leak, they pulled down one side of the inner wall in our room and pulled up the floor. We didn't raise any objections and agreed that they should repair the water pipe from our apartment down.
The leak didn't stop. We realized that we must have omissions. While reciting the Fa, I saw my own problems as well as the problems that existed among practitioners in our area. A few practitioners had passed away because of sickness karma. Other practitioners helped us by sending righteous thoughts. Though we denied the old forces' arrangements, we acknowledged that the old forces were persecuting us. We actually helped the old forces and reinforced the persecution of those practitioners. We thought our righteous thoughts hadn't worked because we couldn't identify the causes.
Some practitioners complained that the practitioners suffering sickness karma lacked righteous thoughts. Practitioners became helpless and thought they couldn't change the situation. Some practitioners passed away after they had endured for quite a long time. Practitioners became numb and no longer cared about those practitioners experiencing sickness tribulations when they lasted for a long time. They held the same attitude toward those practitioners who were detained by the police.
Other practitioners talked about the problems of those practitioners and sent righteous thoughts without complaint. We were not able to eliminate the evil or help save those practitioners.
The practitioners in the coordination team shared their insights and looked within. We put forward some solutions to solve the problems.
I explained the facts about Falun Dafa to the workers, and they withdrew their memberships from the CCP and its affiliated organizations. Because of our kindness and cooperation, they said that Falun Dafa was good. They completed their work a month later. The person in charge said to me, “Thank you for your kind reception. Thank you for your selfless cooperation. Be assured that there will not be any problems this time.” My son paid him when the job was done.
We had done the right thing with a calm mind. My husband told me the next day that the edema was gone. I realized that my leg no longer hurt. With Master's compassionate protection, we finally passed this test after overcoming countless obstacles over the past year.
We celebrated our golden anniversary on January 20, 2018. All our relatives said that they didn't expect my husband to recover so well and so quickly. He looked younger. Falun Dafa is truly amazing!
“But, in that instant the old forces have been exploiting the times of differing lengths, doing what they want to do in different dimensions. But Master is, conversely, using all of what they do to bring about Dafa disciples’ success ...” (“2012 International Fa Conference at the U.S. Capital”)
Master used the old forces to improve our xinxing and transform our karma.
Looking back at the experience, I let go of my resentment toward my husband. He also realized the seriousness of cultivation.
Master has guided every step we have walked and protected us at every moment. Even in difficult situations, we didn't step back, give up, or give in to the evil. We didn't exaggerate the power of the old forces and didn't pay much attention to sickness karma. Under all circumstances, I kept clarifying the truth to people, put aside our personal tribulations, and did what we are required to do.
Local practitioners were greatly encouraged by my husband's recovery and again witnessed the wonder and power of Falun Dafa and Master's boundless compassion. Our whole family thanks Master Li for his salvation and fellow practitioners for their selfless help.