Falun Dafa Cured My Depression
(Minghui.org) Falun Dafa has purified my mind and body, freeing me from depression. I have become open-minded and cheerful, and my health has also improved significantly. My family members now live harmoniously. Falun Dafa has given me a new life!
I am writing this article in the hope that people who suffer depression will be inspired.
How Depression Hit Me
I was a lively and active girl, always smiling when I was young. My relatives, friends, and teachers liked me a lot.
The Great Cultural Revolution started when I was 10 years old. My home was ransacked. When I was 14, my family of 6 were forcibly moved to the countryside. Being the eldest child, I had to fetch water from a three-meter-deep well every day for six years. I had to carry the big bucket of water home for our family.
When I was 20 years old, I sprained my back when I was carrying a large wok. I was in such pain that I had to lay down.
When my back pain eased a bit, I changed my profession and became a lathe operator. I had to sit down for a break quite a few times while at work because of my back pain. My section chief then criticized me in a meeting, though he did not mention my name. Due to my back pain and the mental pressure at work, I felt depressed every day for half a year.
I later became a teacher in a vocational school. I could only teach two classes each day, or my back pain would become too severe.
I became more and more introverted as the back pain persisted. I didn't like to interact with people and preferred to be alone.
After I got married, I was unable to get along with my in-laws because we had different habits and lifestyles. Eight people lived under one roof. I had to live with my in-laws, including my husband's brother and his wife and son. My husband and I were quite different people, and I could not accommodate him. I never quarreled with them, but I was angry inside and shed tears when nobody was around.
To be close to our home so I could look after our then three-year-old daughter, I changed my job and became an office administrator in a private company. The job was not secure and I felt the pressure. I changed my job several times. I eventually ended up unemployed for 5 years. The last company I worked for closed.
I developed heart problems, gallstones, bronchiectasis, gynecological diseases, migraines, Ménière's disease, and severe depression.
An insecure job, health problems, and an unhappy marriage trapped me like a merciless net. I became negative about everything and developed insomnia. Acupuncture, Chinese medicine, and sleeping pills did nothing to help me. I lived a miserable life. I often contemplated suicide.
Falun Dafa Changed Me Completely
I started to practice Falun Dafa on January 17, 1994. Its principles of “Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance” touched me.
I attended the classes held by our Teacher, the founder of Falun Dafa, Li Hongzhi. I listened to our Teacher attentively at the start, but soon fell asleep. I was like that every day during the lecture session.
“A few individuals may fall asleep and wake up as soon as I finish my lecture. Why is that? It is because their brains have illnesses that need to be treated. One will be unable to stand it if one’s brain is worked on. Therefore, one must be put into a state of anesthesia or become unconscious.” (Lecture Two in Zhuan Falun)
I was like what He described: I had migraines, Ménière's, disease, and depression. Teacher was purifying my body.
Brainwashed by the CCP's atheism for years, I did not cultivate straight away. I only practiced the exercises to heal my illnesses.
I was doing the sitting meditation one day in 1999 when I suddenly felt deep regret that I had not cherished Falun Dafa enough. I cried. I also made up my mind to really cultivate from that day on.
I studied the book and tried to follow the principles of “Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance” in letting go of many of my attachments such as jealousy, competitiveness, complaining, vanity, and seeking fame and personal interest. I tried to look within myself for my attachments when I had conflicts with others. I also practiced the exercises every day.
Within three months, I underwent a fundamental change both physically and mentally. My depression and insomnia disappeared. My other diseases were significantly alleviated as well. My body felt light and I was joyous.
After I truly cultivated, I realized that I was a selfish and narrow-minded person with strong attachments to fame and personal gain. As such, I realized that the problems with my husband were caused by me.
He was a peaceful and helpful person and not interested in fame or personal gain, though he was a bit stubborn. I no longer wanted to divorce him. I had a good talk with him—I hadn't talked to him very much in all the years after our marriage due to my introverted character and depression. The misunderstandings between us dissolved. I talked to him more times in that half a year than I had in the previous 10 years.
I used to have conflicts with my mother-in-law. After I cultivated in Falun Dafa, I no longer complained about her. We bought a small house next to ours for her, and I looked after her daily. She liked to read books, and for two years she read Dafa books every day and seldom talked to us. My husband made fun of her for that, but she just smiled. When she passed away, she did so peacefully.
I used to complain about my parents in my heart. I complained about them taking me to the countryside where I sprained my back, for not talking to me, and for not giving me the opportunity to go to a university. I also complained about society: our home was ransacked during the Cultural Revolution; we were forcibly transferred to the countryside; I was unemployed, and so on. Yet I stopped complaining about these things after I truly practiced Falun Dafa.
Looking back over my journey, I realize that my depression was mainly caused by my mentality. I was negative about everything and complained about everything in my heart.
Guided by Falun Dafa's principles, I tried to let go of my shortcomings of complaining, hostility, wanting to change other people, being self-centered, and my human notions. I soon felt relieved and happy. The book Zhuan Falun provided me with answers to things that had puzzled and bewildered me. It ended my internal struggle and my search for the meaning of life.
It is so good to practice Falun Dafa. I now have a positive attitude about life and other people. I hope people will read Zhuan Falun and come out of depression as I did. I wish them a life full of sunshine and a bright future.