(Minghui.org) I started practicing Falun Gong in the fall of 2011. Before that, I thought that Falun Gong was just some kind of qigong for healing and fitness.
At first, I did not quite understand why cultivators had to go out and clarify the facts about Falun Dafa. Thinking I needed to be polite, I did not ask. I spent some time reading Dafa books, but my understanding of the Fa was limited to a perceptual awareness.
Later, I began to understand why practitioners risked their lives to tell people the facts. It was their compassion, through which they offered people salvation. At that time, I still had thoughts about protecting myself and wondered whether I could do that. Would I be able to contribute? I repeatedly asked myself this.
When I read Zhuan Falun for the first time, I had diarrhea right after. I knew that Master was purifying my body. In a dream, I saw a big eye. Master flew out of that eye and healed my illnesses. Those were my experiences and I asked myself, "How could those be fake?"
I asked a fellow practitioner what I should do. He politely responded that I needed to study the Fa more and then I would know what to do. Soon thereafter, I started to do the three things. Six months later, I felt that I had an in-depth understanding of the Fa and distributed the materials. I regarded myself as a cultivator and felt good about myself.
After a while, I was bothered by nightmares every day. At night, it felt as though a black substance entered my space and negative energy entered my body. At that time, I did not know how to look inward, but I told myself not to be afraid.
However, other things started happening. I began to talk to myself from the bottom of my heart: “Why are this and that happening to me? Is this my problem?” Understanding my confusion, Master brought the word “empty” into my dream, and I suddenly realized my attachment to showing off. Although other practitioners did not see it, it was hidden inside of me. From the time I started to cultivate, I felt that I might be superior to others, had a better understanding, was smarter, and therefore, might have come from a very high level. Those kinds of thoughts frequently circled around in my head.
When I woke up, I sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate these thoughts. In the meantime, I realized that cultivation is serious and all my thoughts should be righteous. I also understood why many new practitioners were not truly obtaining the Fa. The old forces have prevented them from getting to know the Fa, and, without Master, we would have no chance to obtain the Fa.
I like to mention to other new practitioners: Let us be diligent in our cultivation and become true cultivators. Thank you, Master, and thank you, my fellow practitioners!
