Letting Go of Hatred

(Minghui.org) I looked at the stars at night when I was young and asked myself, who was I and why I was here. I always knew that this world was not where I wanted to be. When my father came home from work he read me stories in Journey to the West. I frequently dreamed that one day I’d have a master too, who would guide me. I had no interest in practicing qigong in the 1980s when it was very popular in China—I felt it couldn’t eliminate my illnesses or free me from the cycle of life and death.

I saw my classmate’s copy of Essentials for Further Advancement in 1997. I liked how it looked and borrowed it even though she said that she hadn’t read it yet. I opened the first page and saw Master’s photo. His eyes moved and he smiled at me—he looked very kind. I finished reading the book that night. I felt wonderful, and that Falun Dafa was what I was looking for.

The next day I returned the book and asked my classmate if she had more of the Falun Dafa books. She said she didn’t. I asked the other students. Two days later a janitor brought me a copy of Zhuan Falun that he said belonged to his mother. I stayed up all night and read the entire book. I was not sleepy—instead I was excited: I have a Master, and I will practice Falun Dafa.

I woke up early the next day to join the practitioners in a group exercise site near where I lived. While I exercised, I had to run to the restroom every half an hour. This went on for a few days.

One night I had a dream in which many people were chasing me. I climbed up a big tree, but they followed me. I shouted, “Vajra Toppling a Mountain” (Chapter II, Exercises are the Supplementary Means for Reaching Perfection) and straightened my arms in front of me. The people vanished. Soon, another group of people charged toward me from other directions. I said the same phrase and did the same movement, and they also disappeared. From that day on, I no longer needed to use a bathroom when I exercised. I saw the power of Falun Dafa, and how Master drove away my “creditors.” Since that day, I have become healthy.

It was a wonderful time. Every morning I did the exercises with other practitioners, and we studied the Fa in the evenings. I was energetic and happy. At home and at work I never complained about my chores and assignments. I often told others about Falun Dafa’s principles. My husband was supportive of my practice, and told me that when I meditated I looked like a celestial maiden.

My husband is a kind and honest person, and we work in the same state-owned company. His performance at work was outstanding and he became a high level manager in his 30s. He had a bright future in front of him.

After the persecution of Falun Dafa started in 1999, my husband shouldered much pressure from the authorities because I refused to give up the practice. An official in the company told him to divorce me. He replied after careful consideration, “I’m first and foremost a man, and then a state official.” He never brought up divorce or spoke ill of Dafa. He continued to work in that position, and did not take gifts or bribes. He was dignified and upright.

Before I began practicing, I had a dream about my husband having an affair with a short woman who had a little boy. I had a fight with him after I woke up, but soon realized that it was just a dream.

After the persecution began the authorities locked me up for not giving up my faith. When I was released, my husband admitted that he had an affair while I was incarcerated. My first instinct was that it was over between us, “He’s not pure and I don’t want him.” I would have made his life hell if I hadn’t practiced Falun Dafa. I calmed down and held my anger in, I promised Master that I’d pass this test.

I believed that the degenerated atheist mindset promoted by the Chinese Communist regime polluted my husband’s mind and made him think that being unfaithful in marriage was acceptable. My husband wasn’t a bad person, he sided with me in my most difficult times and approved of my practicing Falun Dafa. If I filed for a divorce and allowed him to marry the other woman, who was also married with a child, I would destroy two families and the children. I didn’t feel like punishing the two of them because they already brought karma upon themselves by being unfaithful.

I asked my husband what his plan was, and he said he did not want a divorce. I told him he needed to give her up, “We are husband and wife. We started a family from scratch and made it till this day. We have to continue our lives, and do the right thing, so that our children will be blessed.” He agreed to talk to the woman.

During the next few days my husband came home and often argued with me. I believed that the woman refused to let go and spoke ill of me. I did not fight with him, or ask any questions. I felt calm, because I had Master and Falun Dafa, and I knew that I had to do the right thing.

Two months passed, and the woman threatened to kill herself if my husband did not divorce me. I called her husband, and he said that he would not divorce her no matter what. Knowing that divorce was not an option for either family, I called the woman. I reminded her of society’s traditional values and the Fa teachings I knew at the time. We talked for almost an hour.

“I heard that you want to commit suicide. If you did, your son will have no mother, your mother will have no daughter, and your husband will remarry, and nothing will change. People can die for good reasons or no reasons, which one is the case for you?

“If you killed yourself because of an affair, your son will never be able to walk with his head up high. Why can’t you think of your son, the person who is closest to you? You only care about your selfish desires. As a Falun Dafa practitioner, I don’t care what happened between you and my husband. I want to tell you that you are still young, and it will bring you a lot of karma if you commit suicide. The karma will remain with you when you reincarnate. I also want to tell you that you came to this world to cultivate so that you can return to your true home, where your true family is eagerly waiting for you to return.”

She listened quietly and thanked me in the end, “If I had time, I would definitely practice Falun Dafa with you.”

My husband praised me for being persuasive—I convinced her with one phone call, something he could not achieve over the past two months. I told him that I was able to do so with the wisdom Falun Dafa had given me. Later the woman’s parents went to beg for her husband’s forgiveness, and they got back together.

There is an old saying, “Lust is the worst of all evils.” Nowadays many corrupt officials casually have affairs, not knowing that they are losing their good fortune and longevity for doing bad deeds, and it could even hurt their families.

Several years later my husband was fed up with the struggling and mind games in the state companies, and decided to join a private sector company. Many companies wanted to hire him, and he chose to work for a morally upright person for a low salary. He helped the company build many factories, which are very profitable. He has made a lot of money since.

Our child went overseas to study and received two degrees. He found a job and got married and now has two beautiful children. We are happy for him.