Finding and Eliminating My Fundamental Attachment

(Minghui.org) When I listened to the Minghui podcasts, an article caught my attention: “Breaking Through the State of Being Sleepy While Studying the Fa and Sending Righteous Thoughts.” The author said that many practitioners may not have a clear understanding of what Master calls, “fundamental attachments,” and they don’t know what their fundamental attachments are.

I asked myself: Have I eliminated my fundamental attachments? I believed I had. But the third time I listened to this article, I thought more deeply about the issue.

When I was young, I had a severe skin condition. Because of my embarrassment and distress, I wanted to cure it, so I started practicing Falun Dafa. I later understood the Fa principles of cause and effect and knew that I only needed to cultivate my xinxing (mind nature) and leave everything to Master. I felt that I had long let go of the desire to cure my disease.

My daughter (who also practices Falun Dafa) was unable to go to school because she always seemed to be ill. I searched within myself to find the reason why my ten-year-old daughter often experienced dizziness, fever, dermatitis, and other conditions over the past year, and was frequently unable to go to school.

I did find some of my attachments, such as sentimentality, the wish to avoid problems, the pursuit of comfort, impatience, and an attachment to reputation. My daughter also looked within and found that she had jealousy and a competitive mentality. However, the situation did not change.

I thought back on my daughter’s cultivation and why I encouraged her to practice Falun Dafa. She knew that all lives come for the Fa, and this was her true hope in life. But behind this was my hidden selfishness: I had a hereditary skin disease that seriously affected my appearance when I was young, and my classmates often teased me. My suffering made me wish to protect my daughter.

I didn’t realize that this concern for my daughter was a human notion and attachment. I suppressed the thought, and pushed her to learn Dafa and practice the exercises.

This realization stunned me. I wept and apologized to Master: Behind my fundamental attachment was a hidden heart that wanted to use the Fa. I cultivated for 25 years, but only now have I uncovered this attachment. I asked Master to forgive me.

Being a life created by the Fa, I should treat the Fa with reverence and humility. How could I use my own notions to measure the Fa? How could I have the heart to take advantage of the Fa? I also realized that these notions manifest society’s deviation from the Fa in the end days.

I recognized my fundamental attachment and filthy human heart. When I looked inward and rectified myself my daughter miraculously regained her health, went to school that afternoon, and hasn’t missed a day of school since then.

I am grateful for Master’s compassion and salvation and for not giving up on me. The only way I can repay Master’s kindness is to do the three things well and fulfill my vow.