The Moment I Let Go of My Attachment to Life and Fear of Death, I Stopped Vomiting Blood

(Minghui.org) I started to practice Falun Dafa in 1997, but I stopped cultivating for over 10 years due to human attachments after being persecuted, and I didn’t keep up with the Fa-rectification. I was taken advantaged of by the old forces because of my sentimentality for my children and because I looked at whatever I encountered from the perspective of human thoughts and human feelings.

In 2015, I started to cough, and I ate less and less. I coughed so much at night that I couldn’t lie down, and I became thinner by the day. Although I did the three things, I didn’t know how to cultivate and look inward. I thought it was just sickness karma and endured it. Because my cough was worse at night, my husband got after me, blaming me for not taking any medicine. Then I became afraid of being scolded. I was so nervous all day that I couldn’t calm down when I studied the Fa or did the exercises. I got worse and worse. I used to weigh over 100 pounds, but my weight had dropped to about 70 pounds. Then I started vomiting blood.

My husband called my family. My brother and sister-in-law and other relatives came and forced me to go to the hospital. The test results showed that I had “tuberculosis” and “diabetes,” they wanted to admit me to an infectious disease hospital. I only had one thought: “I can’t stay in the hospital.” When we got to the infectious disease hospital, we learned that the hospital didn’t have heat, so my family had to take me home. When I got home, I was very happy and knew that Master was taking care of me and I didn’t need to stay in the hospital.

I calmed down and felt very happy. The next day, my nephew came to see me. He tricked me into getting into his car and drove me to the hospital where my other brother worked. At that time, he was the director of a township hospital. Seeing how thin I was, he hugged me and cried. I also became emotional and agreed to an IV injection. During that time, I really felt like I was living a life worse than death, and I felt that life had no meaning.

After I returned home, I discovered that my husband had taken away my Dafa books. I didn’t know if he had thrown them away or burned them, but I was extremely distressed: In addition to me not cultivating well, now my family had committed a sin against Dafa, bringing shame to Master and Dafa. I even felt ashamed to see fellow practitioners.

That is, until one day when I again vomited blood. At that time, I enlightened that I couldn’t continue to be so negative. After all, if the old forces took my physical body away, wouldn’t I further discredit Dafa? At this time, I remembered the phone number of a fellow practitioner I hadn’t contacted for a long time. I sent her a text message, and the next day she and another practitioner came to my home to share with me about cultivation, which encouraged me greatly.

They also brought me some Dafa books. I started studying the Fa again and listened to Minghui articles every day. After this lesson, I made up my mind to study the Fa well, and I found many attachments. I wanted to get rid of them with righteous thoughts, especially the attachments of sentimentality and fear.

One night I vomited blood again, and my husband happened to see it. This time I was not afraid, thinking: “Maybe Master wants me to get rid of this fear.” I vomited again, and my husband called my name and said, “You vomited half a bowl of blood earlier. How much more did you throw up now?” I said, “You force me to take medicine and get injections every day, and I have only gotten worse, not better. From today on, I will not take a single pill. I will study the Fa and practice the exercises well and leave everything to Master. Only my Master can save me!” I kept reciting in my heart:

“...When disciples have ample righteous thoughtsMaster has the power to turn back the tide”(“The Master-Disciple Bond,” Hong Yin II)

“Live with no pursuit,Die not caring about staying;Clear out all wild thoughts,Cultivating to a Buddha is not hard.”(“Nonexistence,” Hong Yin)

The moment I let go of the attachment to life and the fear of death, I stopped vomiting blood, and my husband’s attitude changed. He no longer pressured me to go to the hospital or take medicine. I suddenly understood that all my tribulations were caused by my fear. It was just as Master said,

“All of you are aware of the principle of mutual-generation and mutual-inhibition. If you have no fear, the factor that would make you afraid will cease to exist.” (“Eliminate Your Last Attachment(s),” The Essentials of Diligent Progress II)

Just like that, I stopped taking medicine, and I studied the Fa and practiced the exercises with a calm mind. I no longer vomited blood, and my cough was basically cured.

My husband witnessed the wonderfulness of Dafa and has supported my studying the Fa ever since. Sometimes he studies with me, and sometimes he helps me distribute truth-clarification materials. He also wrote a solemn statement that he is really saved! Master is so compassionate. My daughter-in-law was a member of the Chinese Communist Party (CCP), and she has withdrawn from it. My two little granddaughters recite, “Falun Dafa is good, Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good” every day. I also teach my little granddaughters to recite poems from Hong Yin. I truly understand that only by cultivating myself well can I save my family and more sentient beings, so that our compassionate Master can worry less and be pleased.

Thank you, compassionate Master! Thank you to all the fellow practitioners who helped me! This is the first time I have ever submitted an article. If there is anything that is not in accordance with the Fa, please kindly point it out to me!

Heshi!