I Cried After Reading Master’s New Article

(Minghui.org) Master Li (Falun Dafa’s founder) published two articles on August 31 and September 1, 2023. It happened to be a long weekend and I was planning to memorize them. As I began to read “Stay Far Away From Peril,” I burst into tears and cried for a long time.

I asked myself why I had cried. I think it was my knowing side that reacted, likely because I hadn’t done well in cultivation and didn’t have complete faith in Master and the Fa.

Master said, “Let me ask you, if it would take another ten years to save all sentient beings, would you still do it?” (Teachings From a Tour of North America) Master also said in 2005 that the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) probably wouldn’t be given the opportunity to put on a show during the 2008 Beijing Olympics. But as time passed, the CCP still existed. While I didn’t complain about it, I did develop the thought that Master hadn’t kept his word.

Why Do I Cultivate?

A few years ago, I was under extreme pressure while doing a Dafa-related project. We had very few people but were given heavy tasks, which we were required to finish in a short time and maintain high quality. Every day, after I finished my tasks, I received feedback from the coordinator and team members on how to improve my work. As I was also doing some other projects, I felt extremely tired and that I had reached my maximum capacity.

Under that circumstance, I developed very strong resentment and refused to accept any suggestions for improvement. I often lost my temper with fellow practitioners. I began to doubt the purpose of my cultivation: “Why do I have to work so hard? Is it for me to reach a higher level? What’s the point of reaching a higher level in cultivation?”

I was in a very dangerous situation. In my dream, I was climbing up a steep cliff. Beneath me was a bottomless abyss.

Master gave me many hints that I should study the Fa more. I began to recite the article “Expounding on the Fa” and paragraphs from Master’s other lectures that I had memorized. I also read more sharing articles on Minghui.org. I realized that my thought karma was interfering with me. I remember when answering a student’s question, Master said something along the lines that if a cultivator lost interest in cultivation, evil factors were interfering with him.

I realized that it was my “fake self” who was complaining and losing interest in cultivation and my “genuine self” who signed the contract with Master and vowed to assist Master in Fa-rectification. I began to send righteous thoughts to eliminate the “fake self,” and after that, I finally passed the tribulation.

Why Did I Cry?

In the movie “Exodus,” Moses led the Israelites out of Egypt. God asked him to walk to the promised land of Canaan in 11 days, but the trip ended up taking 40 years. The Jews who followed Moses thanked and praised God when they saw Moses splitting the Red Sea. But when they encountered difficulties, they lost faith in God and even complained about God. As a result of their complaints and other sins like idolatry, most of the Israeli adults were not allowed to enter the Promised Land.

I think the reason I cried so hard is because my knowing side is aware of the efforts Master Li has spent in trying to save me; but because of my complaints and doubts, part of my universe was destroyed and I may no longer be qualified to enter the “Promised Land” at some point.

Looking at my cultivation over the years, I was doing poorly a few years ago. If the Fa-rectification ended back then, I might have been destroyed for not reaching the desired level Master set for me in my cultivation. Now, I no longer think about when everything will end, but am full of gratitude for everything Master has done for me and all of us. I hope I can follow Master on my cultivation path until the end, no matter how long it takes.

The above is my understanding at my limited level. I welcome fellow practitioners to point out anything improper.