(Minghui.org) Greetings, venerable Master! Greetings, fellow practitioners!
I started practicing Falun Dafa in 1995. Even though I’ve practiced for 28 years I always felt that I did not cultivate very well. A fellow practitioner urged me to write down my cultivation experiences and share them with you.
Fortunate to Find Falun Dafa
I was 24 years old in 1994 and suffered from myocarditis. People my age were enjoying their youth, but I was in constant pain. I had panic attacks, fear, angina pectoris, and difficulty breathing. I couldn’t sleep. I did not have the strength to walk—I could not even walk 50 meters (55 yards). Some days I couldn’t get out of bed.
My father took me to the hospital to get a cardiac stimulant. This kind of injection has to be administered slowly, about 15-20 minutes each time. My parents took me to big and small hospitals seeking a cure and eventually turned to Chinese medicine, then Western medicine, and folk remedies. Nothing helped.
We were already poor, but then we became penniless. The only thing left was our house, which my parents wanted to sell to pay for my treatments. I said, “You have done your best. If you sell your house to pay for my medical care, and if I die, won’t I be doing you both a disservice? My conscience wouldn’t allow that. Whether I survive or not, you two must live on so I can feel at ease.”
The whole family wept bitterly. I felt hopeless, not knowing how long I would live. But this thought came to my mind: “Although I didn't mind dying, I’ve lived in vain. I have not done anything for others, I have not been able to honor and repay my parents for raising me, and I regret that. I can’t die like this; I can’t be unfilial. If I can repay my parents for raising me and do something good before I die, I could die peacefully. I don’t know if heaven exists, but I think it does. Please extend my life and let me fulfill my wish.”
While struggling with thoughts of death, I experienced something unique. Late one night, when I couldn’t fall asleep, I thought, “How long will I live?” Suddenly, I heard a noise. I turned to the right, and a tiny colored screen appeared. I saw two men, one in a yellow robe with his hands in the Heshi position [the palms pressed together] and the other in traditional clothing of the past. A voice told me that I would meet them later.
One spoke very fast, but I understood everything he said. He showed me a film about ancient times and people. I thought, “I'm going to die soon—what chance do I have to meet these two people?”
In the following days, strange things kept happening. The sun shone on me in the daytime inside my home. When I told my family and friends, my father said, “What should we do? Our daughter seems to be mentally ill.” When I saw their reaction, I stopped talking about it. I did not know that my celestial eye had opened.
Shortly afterward, I was introduced to my husband. He practiced Falun Dafa. After he learned about my situation, he immediately taught me to do the exercises. He gave me a copy of Zhuan Falun and asked me to read it. When I read the second lecture, I realized I had already experienced much of what Master said. I unconditionally believed in the Master’s teachings, even if I didn’t understand everything. I believed what Master said was true and that Dafa was good. I also understood why people get sick and what the source of sickness is.
When I read what Master said about putting others before myself, I felt this was what I wanted. I decided to cultivate, so I continued to read the Fa and do the exercises every day.
What It Means to “Look Within”
When I started practicing, I found doing the exercises challenging because I had a lot of karma so my health was bad. I did the exercises for two hours while others did one hour. When I did not feel well, I did the exercises longer. After cultivating like this for some time, my health was miraculously restored.
I found a job and was able to go to work. My family and our neighbors witnessed how I came back from the dead. They all knew that Dafa saved my life and that Falun Dafa was good. Many people who knew me started practicing.
I didn’t know how to cultivate or look inward. I just followed Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance when I did things and in how I treated people. I kept doing the exercises every day, but I didn’t quite understand the more profound Fa principles Master taught.
About six months after I started to practice, I was just about to meditate at home one night when my father turned on the TV. It was very loud and I couldn’t calm down to meditate. My first thought was to tell my father to turn down the sound. Just before the words came out of my mouth, a thought came to me: “I am a cultivator. Master taught us that we should be considerate of others. It is now time for Dad to watch TV. I should not disturb him. I should find a suitable time to do the exercises. I shouldn’t ask others to do something to meet my own needs.”
So I sat down quietly without saying anything to my father. After a while, I couldn’t hear anything and I was able to meditate.
A heavenly scene appeared before me. I saw angelic fairies flying around me, which was beautiful. I also saw a child running towards me. After I finished meditating, I finally realized what it means to “look within.” I sincerely felt Master’s merciful salvation, and from then on, what Master said about “looking within” was deeply imprinted in my heart.
Master’s Encouragement
At that time, I sold clothes in a shopping mall. My boss paid me 800 yuan a month. One month, I lost 800 yuan. I was very anxious because my finances were not very good. I was very stressed.
Then I remembered what Master said,
“For a cultivator, all the frustrations he comes across among everyday people are trials.” (“A Cultivator is Naturally Part of It” in Essentials for Further Advancement).
I reminded myself that I am a cultivator, and there is no such thing as coincidence in cultivation. This was a trial I had to pass, and I knew I should do as Master asked.
So I called my boss and said, “Please deduct the money I lost today from my paycheck. I can’t cause you any loss because of my fault.” After I said that, I was very calm.
After I read the Fa for a while, I began to do the standing exercises. When I was Holding the Wheel in Front of the Head, I suddenly saw a Falun (which seemed orange) in front of my eyes. Underneath the Falun was a beautiful, translucent, pale pink lotus flower. The Falun turned clockwise precisely nine times and counter-clockwise nine times, and the lotus flower kept turning over. It was clear as day. At that moment, my heart trembled, and I realized that, because I did what Master said when I lost the money, no matter how difficult it was, Master was encouraging me to cultivate well. Through this, my belief in Master and the Fa grew stronger.
Master Gives Me a New Heart
Because I obtained the Fa due to illness, I experienced karma elimination many times. Almost one year after I started cultivating, Master eliminated the karma from my heart. When I woke up one morning, my heart suddenly hurt terribly. It hurt so much when I moved that I was in tears. It felt like someone had cut my heart out with a knife, and it hurt even more than when I was ill. I couldn’t eat. I still had a job selling clothes, so I had to go to work. Seeing my situation, my mother tried to stop me. I thought, “I’m a cultivator. I’m not sick. It is Master’s way of eliminating my sickness karma. I’m not sick. I have to go to work.”
So I went to work as usual, but the pain would not go away, and I was in pain 24 hours a day. I couldn’t sleep because of the pain, so I got up to study the Fa. The next day the pain continued. By the third day, my voice was almost completely hoarse.
That night I thought, “Master, I know this is not a disease, but if my hoarse voice affects my ability to sell clothing, I’ll rest; if it doesn’t affect my work, I’ll go to work.” But on the morning of the fourth day, a miracle happened. My voice was back, and my heart didn’t hurt at all. I felt a calmness in my heart that I had never felt before, and I realized that it was Master who had helped me get rid of this great karma and that I had a brand new heart.
I couldn’t express in words how grateful I was to Master. I experienced the magic of Dafa and I resolved to cultivate. With my Master’s blessing, I recovered one year later and happily married my husband in 1997.
The Persecution Leads to a Broken Family
The four years after I began practicing Dafa were the happiest of my life. Master gave me life, health, and happiness. I was bathed in Master’s compassion and felt extremely happy.
But in 1999, the Chinese Communist Party’s (CCP) cruel persecution of Falun Dafa began. The CCP lied about Dafa and Master. Like all Dafa disciples, my husband and I were arrested, tortured, held in detention centers and “re-education” forced labor camps, and sentenced to prison for petitioning, distributing truth-clarification materials, and clarifying the truth to validate Dafa. We were inhumanely persecuted.
My husband was persecuted so severely in prison that he passed away four years after serving the entire sentence. After he was released, he did not recover. I was put into a forced labor camp for two years and suffered great physical and mental harm. It was Master restored my health again so that I could be who I am today.
After my family was destroyed due to the persecution, I went to Thailand and then to San Francisco. Since then, I have been doing the three things. I want to share some of the insights I have gained in my cultivation over the years.
A Miracle Happened When I Eliminated My Emotional Attachment to Family
I have been part of a media project's translation team for 13 years. I feel very honored to be able to be part of this project.
Two years ago my older brother in China phoned me and said that my mother had a stomach ulcer and her life was in danger. My brother and sister-in-law told me to mentally prepare myself, saying that my mother’s condition was severe and that it would be too late even if she had surgery.
When I was in China, my mother had a stroke because my husband and I were persecuted for practicing Falun Dafa. During the years of persecution, my mother always encouraged me and sacrificed a lot for me. So when I heard that she was critically ill, it felt like my heart broke into pieces.
When I ended the call with my brother and sister-in-law, I thought, “I am a Falun Dafa practitioner, and nothing that happens to me is coincidental.
“During the persecution, I had to leave home. My husband was persecuted to death by the CCP, and I lost my happy family. I'm here to follow Master to do the three things well and fulfill my mission. During those years of cruel persecution, my mother suffered a lot for me, so I have an emotional attachment to her.”
I calmed down and thought, “Master, I will unconditionally follow your arrangement. If my mother must leave this life according to your arrangement, I will understand and let go of this emotion. But if the old forces use my attachment to love for family members to interfere with my doing the three things, I will not allow it. I will never accept such interference. I will follow Master’s arrangement to study the Fa well and translate articles. I will not waste a single day because of this.”
I wiped away my tears, sat down, and started sending forth righteous thoughts. When I read the Fa. I couldn’t stop weeping, so reading a lecture took me longer than usual. Then I sat down in front of the computer and started translating. Suddenly I had a terrible pain in my stomach. I forced myself to endure the pain and I finished translating the article.
The next day, I was pleasantly surprised to get the news from my brother that my mother’s stomach ulcer symptoms had gradually eased from the night before. My mother, who was supposed to be preparing for her funeral, miraculously got better! A month later she was discharged from the hospital. She no longer needs surgery. Once again, I deeply felt that Master was by my side.
I realized my mother had this tribulation because I had an omission in my cultivation, and my love for family members was exploited. I let go of my attachment to family members and decided to follow Master’s arrangements. I kept on reading the Fa and translating articles. Once again, Master showed me how powerful Falun Dafa is!
As Long as We Are Sincere Master Helps Us
When we promoted Shen Yun in my city last year, one incident touched me deeply. I was assigned to cover my neighborhood, so I distributed Shen Yun fliers after work.
After I finished an area, I suddenly realized that I’d missed a business. I thought, “We are here to save the people in this area, and they are waiting for us.”
With this sincere heart, I pushed open the door and entered the store, greeting the owner with a smile. My English is limited, but I told the owner about the show and gave him the flier, which he happily accepted. I pointed to the window and asked him if I could put up posters. He immediately agreed. He let me put the posters on the windows where people could see them and helped me tape them up. The process was so pleasant and smooth; it was the first time I’d ever put up posters by myself.
I was so happy. I knew that this was Master’s compassionate encouragement for me to take a step forward. Because my English is not very good, I’d never dared to think about putting up posters before, but this time, Master saw that I was using my compassion to save people, so he empowered me to get rid of this notion and pushed me one step forward. I realized that, as long as we do it with all our hearts, Master will help us.
Since then I no longer have the idea that my English is not good enough to put up posters. Whenever I go door-to-door, I bring a few posters. Although I don’t put up many posters, I know that this is a cultivation opportunity.
My Coworkers Witness the Extraordinary Power of Dafa
In March 2020, COVID-19 began spreading worldwide, and many families experienced the pain of their loved ones dying. It was a great calamity for ordinary people and a test for us practitioners.
I thought, “I practice Falun Dafa and these viruses will not affect me. Regardless of the circumstances, I will go to work and cultivate as usual. I must not be disturbed and I will not let them affect me.”
As the virus spread, my boss asked every employee to get the COVID shot. Ordinary people take their health very seriously and are afraid of catching COVID. So I told her, “I’m healthy, but I want to put your mind at ease, so I’ll get the vaccine.” She said she would ask the other employees to take me when they got their shots, and I agreed. Everyone else was vaccinated, but no one remembered to take me when they got their shots. I realized Master harmonized everything for me.
In the following days, one by one, the staff came down with colds, fevers, and coughs. I thought, “Nothing is by chance; the old forces are using this to interfere with me; I don’t accept their arrangement. I am a Fa-Rectification Period Dafa disciple, so I have to be at my best to validate Dafa.” I was fine while everyone in the company had flu symptoms.
During the early, most severe period of the pandemic, even though my coworkers were vaccinated, many people had pneumonia. The company owner required everyone to be tested, and I was tested twice. The results showed I had no virus. One day I felt sick. I had a fever at night and couldn’t sleep. I felt tired, as if I had symptoms of pneumonia.
I reminded myself, “I am a Falun Dafa practitioner, and this is interference.” I stopped thinking about my symptoms and kept working.
I felt feverish and uncomfortable when I got home and translated an article. Not wanting to go along with this notion, I did the second exercise. After an hour, the thought that I was “sick” disappeared.
The company staff’s coughs and colds did not affect me. My boss said, “Everyone else is not feeling well, but look at you. You’re fine.”
I smiled and told her that, because I practice Falun Dafa, I was fine. After my boss observed my situation, she felt that pandemics did not affect practitioners and believed what I told her was true. From then on, she never mentioned my having to get vaccinated because she knew that practitioners are very healthy.
Conclusion
I have been cultivating for 28 years. Throughout all the storms and struggles in my cultivation, under Master’s care, I have made it to this day. When I reflect on these years of cultivation, I have nothing but gratitude for Master. Master has encouraged me with compassion, endured a lot of tribulations for me, given me everything, and cared for me. In my remaining years of cultivation, I can only do the three things well, save more people, and cultivate myself well to live up to Master’s merciful salvation.
Thank you, Master! Thank you, fellow practitioners, for always helping me!
(Presented at the 2023 San Francisco Falun Dafa Experience Sharing Conference)
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