My Experience of Looking Inward

(Minghui.org) I am 81 years old and I began practicing Falun Dafa in 1996. I have not had any earth-shattering or unforgettable experiences, nor do I have a deep understanding of the teachings.

Memorizing Zhuan Falun

I began to memorize Zhuan Falun in 2006. I read in Master Li’s (Dafa’s founder) article,

“Those of us who have the ability, who are in their prime, excepting people who are older or who have poor memory, should try to memorize the book.” (“Comments Regarding the Fa-Rectification Made at the Falun Dafa Assistants’ Meeting in Beijing”, Further discussions on Falun Dafa)

Although Master addressed young people and I’m one of the “elderly, those whose memory is not good,” I felt that whatever Master asks is important, so I decided to memorize.

Most local practitioners were not memorizing Zhuan Falun at the time. I memorized at home on my own without telling anyone. I memorized on and off at first, memorizing some days and reading on other days. After memorizing the book once, I stopped. I was not sure whether it was better to memorize Zhuan Falun or read through it.

I took my time and memorized Zhuan Falun eight times. I did not focus on memorizing it until five years ago. Now I persistently memorize one lecture of Zhuan Falun each day, and I also read Master’s other articles.

I realize that there are no shortcuts in memorizing the Fa. Elderly practitioners can do it. I’d like to share three important points.

(1) For those whose education level is low, one needs to at least understand the meaning of each word and each sentence. Memorizing is easier after one understands it.

(2) One must be able to endure. Just read and memorize repeatedly. Memorize again when you forget, one sentence at a time.

(3) Never give up. Constantly encourage yourself.

Looking Inward

Two years ago I began writing down my experiences. I usually did this every day, sometimes once every two days, usually no more than three days. I wrote three big characters on the cover of the notebook, “Look Inward.” I record my words and deeds that do not conform to the Fa, and I look for the manifestations, causes, and roots of these attachments. I apply Dafa’s principles to correct my behavior.

I think recording my experiences this way is beneficial. I am a veteran practitioner and I’m in my 80s. I record each and every one of my attachments and correct it with the Fa. This helps me focus on studying the Fa carefully, and I use the Fa’s principles to handle daily challenges.

My Attachments are Exposed

My daughter invited seven of her classmates to her home for a party (I live in her home). During the meal, one of them stood up and said: “Look, Auntie’s complexion is so rosy. Ours are not as good as hers.” Everyone praised me. I felt really good in my heart, with a sense of excitement and accomplishment.

When I thought about it later I realized, “My behavior was not right today.” I remembered the example Master gave:

“When others call him a qigong master, he will become delighted and very pleased.” (Lecture two, Zhuan Falun)

What’s the difference between the person Master talked about and me? Wasn’t my happiness at being praised the attachment of zealotry, and showing off? Besides, the changes in my body are due to the extraordinary power of Falun Dafa. What is even more unforgivable is that Master arranged this to happen to give me an opportunity to validate the Fa. Why didn’t I explain the reason I looked so young and healthy was that I practice Falun Dafa? The more I thought about it, the worse I felt. I warned myself: I must never do this again.

Not long after, I celebrated my 80th birthday, and my sons and daughters arranged a banquet for me. Most attendants were my family members; the only outsiders were my daughter’s closest friends. During the dinner, my daughter’s friends raised their glasses and came to congratulate me. One of them said with a smile: “Auntie, you don’t look like an 80-year-old person. You don’t have any wrinkles! Our faces are not as smooth as yours.”

The other one said, “May you always be as young and healthy as an eighteen-year-old. Please tell us your secret!” I said, “My secret is that I practice Falun Dafa. I sincerely thank Master Li, Falun Dafa’s founder.” The aunt sitting next to me also stood up and echoed to me: “You really should thank your Master. Let’s raise our glasses and thank your Master!” Everyone was very happy.

Through studying the Fa, I broadened my ability to look inward: Nothing that happens is accidental. Every situation, good or bad, provides opportunities for me to look inward and improve my xinxing.

For example: When I hear others telling me how excellent their children are, I can see my own attachment to showing off from their showing off. When practitioners comment that someone has cultivated well, or someone has a low xinxing level, it reminds me that I need to watch what I say and not comment on people behind their backs. I should not get into an argument with other practitioners. When I’m irritable, and my tone is not calm I see my attachment to competitiveness and my lack of forbearance and compassion.

I gradually learned how to look inward. I incorporated looking inward into my daily life until it became automatic. Looking inward is a magical tool that Master gave us.