Looking Within and Getting Rid of Loopholes
(Minghui.org) I am presently stuck in a state that makes me sleepy in the mornings, and I can't wake up for the morning exercises. I study the Fa every day, but I seem to be just going through the motions and do not experience improvement in my cultivation.
When I looked within, I felt that although there are many attachments, I couldn't find the root cause of my problem. However, when I calm down I get some idea of what the problem may be.
Letting Go of Jealousy
My most obvious attachment is jealousy. I either will look down on others or I am jealous of their achievements.
I have a colleague who is younger than me, but her thoughts are relatively simple. Although she grew up in an atheist environment, she gradually started to cultivate when she learned about Dafa.
This colleague is quite open, and often shares with me matters about her work and personal life. I often use my own opinions to guide her. This makes her feel that I am considerate and thoughtful.
I started getting carried away with my behavior and began getting more involved in her life. No matter whether her problems were large or small, I wanted to direct her on the “correct” path. On the surface, it looked as though I was doing it for her benefit, but I was actually satisfying my self-centered attachment.
Over time, this kind of the wrong attitude, which is not based on the Fa, made me deviate more and more from the righteous path, making me increasingly self-centered.
“Rather, the person may have experienced some stage of enlightenment and had his powers freed, and gained insights, though incomplete, into reality. Yet his spiritual progress would have been quite limited, in fact, and he would be far from sufficiently divine to save people.” (The Third Talk, Zhuan Falun)
This part of Master's Fa gave me a jolt and made me re-examine my behavior. Although the colleague is simple in her thoughts, she is also a practitioner, so her path will be arranged by Master and the Fa will guide her. Therefore, I can't use my limited knowledge to tell her how she should walk her path, especially when the matters involve the gratitude and grudges of sentient beings.
Every practitioners' cultivation paths are different and the matters that everyone meets with have their own relationships and cultivation factors at play. Since we do not have the ability to see clearly these relationships between people, our random interference may easily create karma for ourselves and also create disturbances for other practitioners’ cultivation paths.
The Fa requires practitioners to not have intentions for the things they do.
“They have taken this approach since they couldn’t perceive the reasons behind things or know whether something was good or bad to do; there would always lurk the question of what factors were involved. Most adherents wouldn’t have been that advanced or able to perceive such things. So if they took action, they would have to worry that what seemed like a good thing to do might turn out to be bad. Their solution was to practice non-intervention as much as possible, in the hope that by refraining from all unnecessary activities or actions they would avoid making karma.” (The Eighth Talk, Zhuan Falun)
I cannot impose my perceptions on others. As a cultivator, I must learn to embrace lives that have different characteristics from mine. Being self-centered makes me a shallow person and being narrow-minded makes it easy for me to become jealous.
“Now that I’ve explained this to you, who are practitioners, you really need to stop this folly. You must be free of jealousy if you want to ever reach heaven.” (The Seventh Talk, Zhuan Falun)
The false kindness, self-centeredness, interfering with others’ affairs and looking down on others stems from jealousy. This attachment must be eliminated at its root.
Letting Go of AttachmentsDespite cultivating for so long, I have never treated my attachment to food seriously. I am very picky about my food. I know Master has spoken about this issue in his lectures, but I just could not meet Master’s requirement.
“So they would just eat whatever people gave them and had no business being picky, since they were leading a holy life. And the food that was given to them may have included meat.” (The Seventh Talk, Zhuan Falun)
I decided to stop being picky about my food, and would eat whatever is available and will not waste any. But, I still took into consideration what particular foods were good for the health or maintain one’s looks.
“If a person can rid himself of a certain attachment, that material thing that he was attached to will no longer affect him, for it is the attachment that really affects you.” (The Seventh Talk, Zhuan Falun)
As I read through this section of Zhuan Falun again, I realized that I am still using thoughts of everyday people's notions to determine what to eat to look after myself. How can a practitioner’s body be affected by ordinary people's food? How can we break through to the higher levels if we don't get rid of worldly perceptions, and how will our bodies transform into the higher matter?
From looking within, I noticed that I have too many loopholes, which could be used by the old forces to persecute me. Luckily, Master has helped me find my inadequacies by studying the Fa. Thus, I am able to correct myself.