Removing My Stock Speculation Obsession
(Minghui.org) I came across stock investing about ten years ago, just when the stock market was going up like crazy. I thought the money I made could be used to prepare pamphlets that clarified the facts about Falun Dafa. However, my peace of mind began to dissolve and I became less alert to the allure of ordinary society.
I rationalized that using stocks to make money, money that came from the corrupt Chinese Communist Party (CCP) anyway, would be okay because I would use it to counteract the persecution.
Money Stuck in the Market for Seven Years
Although it was profitable at first, the stocks that rose the fastest eventually turned into losses because I became too greedy. When the stock market crashed, I sometimes found it difficult to fall asleep. I wasn’t worried about the loss of money, I regretted that the money wouldn’t be available for preparing pamphlets.
I eventually came up with another excuse: speculating in stocks would give me the opportunity to interact with ordinary people and allow them to understand the truth. So I bought and sold stocks for a while, cared about the stock market, and talked with people about Falun Dafa.
Although it is possible to use stock trading to get closer to ordinary people and talk with them about the persecution, the disadvantages outweighed the benefits. When the stock market rises, greed rises; when it falls, the heart suffers. When the stock market completely bottomed out, I gave up making money through stocks.
After a few years, when the market went up again, I set a rule for myself. I was only allowed to regain the money that was stuck in the market, or possibly gain some interest. Once the price reached this line of demarcation, I would sell, even if I knew it would rise further. I had to sell because I knew that any ill-gotten wealth from the stock market would greatly hinder my cultivation.
As it turned out, the stocks that had been stuck for seven years rebounded with great profits. I sold them all in accordance with the rule I had set for myself.
But would this attachment end so easily? The obvious answer was no. After the stocks were traded, I still knew the ups and downs of the game because the information was drilled into my brain, and my greed had not been completely removed. Although I knew that I could no longer speculate in stocks, I was uncomfortable when I saw the stock market rising. When the market fell, conversely, I felt relieved that I had escaped.
Severe Consequences of Stock Speculation for the Second Time
I couldn’t stop myself from later investing again, this time using my parents’ money. I even came up with another excuse: I would earn some pension money. In fact, there was very little money to put in the stock market because I couldn’t let go of a particular investment.
I wanted to make a little money while watching the stock market rise, otherwise I would always feel that I had lost. It didn’t take long for the stock market to fall sharply, and my heart followed likewise. In the end, I was determined to not continue investing. I lost 4,000 yuan, but managed to completely break away from the stock market.
Although I removed all of my money from the market, my heart seemed to be bitten by the poisonous snake of speculating! Each day the stock market opened, I became obsessed. Once the market closed, the snake seemed to loosen its grip.
The Roller Coaster Ride Takes a Toll
During a physical examination in March of that year, my electrocardiogram was good. The stock market then crashed in June. During my physical examination in August, my electrocardiogram was not good. The doctor asked me how it changed so much. I immediately knew that something was wrong with my thinking.
The old forces used this loophole to hurt my body. One day, as I was rushing to talk with someone about Falun Dafa, I quickly ran out breath and felt that my heart was not my own. At that time, I pleaded silently in my mind, “Master please save me.” If Master didn't save me, I could have suffered a heart attack.
In the following months, I tried to abandon my obsession with stock speculation and didn't do any investing. However, because of the mistakes I made and other attachments, I ended up falling and injuring myself one day. After the accident, my heart stayed calm, and I completely let go of the attachment to stock speculating. The serious injuries to my body, however, meant that I was unable to go out to talk with people about Dafa for a long time, which I really regretted.
After these experiences, I realized that it is wrong to think that a small amount of greed or small mistakes won't impact one’s cultivation. The fact is, the old forces will use any weakness to cause huge tribulations in our cultivation.
Schemes Run by the CCP
This reminds me of a practitioner I once knew and admired very much for her contributions to Dafa projects. I felt dwarfed by comparison. However, after she left her job, she bought a financial management product called P2P (a so-called financial innovation product of the CCP) which led to an overnight loss. Such high-interest financial products are not true investments. They are used by the CCP to make money.
Many so-called pension programs tell you how much money you can save and earn interest with, and that you can rely on the profits to support yourself. These are also P2Ps that cheat people out of their money. All these financial P2P products are harmful.
In fact, as long as Dafa practitioners do not slack off in their cultivation and have no intention of gaining without contributing, they will not be fooled by these things.