Looking Inward Unconditionally
(Minghui.org) One day, a fellow practitioner said to me, “Two years ago, you sent an article to the Minghui website. What you wrote in the article was contrary to Master Li’s Fa. Yet, you failed to see your problem during the past two years. You should look inward, and sincerely apologize to Master. Master wouldn't treat you any differently, but the old forces will not forgive you.”
She then told me a story about another practitioner whose state was bad, because she did not follow the Fa, and did what Master would not allow us to do.
I explained why I wrote the article, and that I did not mean what she referred to. She said she pointed it out to me two years ago, and I did not respond. She further urged me to correct this in myself.
I thanked her but felt uncomfortable. I rushed home and wanted to find the original article to use it to explain my view of it to her.
I wanted to turn on my computer as soon as I got home, as I was still upset about it. After I calmed down, I felt something was wrong on my part. I asked myself why I was so anxious. It was because I felt the fellow practitioner wronged me, and I wanted to prove I was right. Then, I asked myself why it mattered, even if I was right? Master asked us to look inward regardless of whether the fellow practitioner was right or wrong.
I stopped turning on the computer. I walked over to Master’s photo and said, “Master, I was wrong. I did not look inward, and wanted to prove that I was right.”
I looked inward carefully and found it was true that I did not respect Master at times. For example, I placed the Dafa book casually here or there, I was very casual when studying the Fa at home, I copied Master’s words by paragraphs in one notebook, and I did not do the three things well. All these were disrespectful to Master.
I appreciated the fellow practitioner’s reminders. I calmed down when I found my problems. I still wanted to find the original article. But my purpose was to check whether there was anything inappropriate in it, instead of proving that I was right.
I found the article and read it closely several times. I confirmed there was nothing in it that was against the Fa. However, I did not want to say anything about it to the fellow practitioner, as I knew it was an opportunity for me to improve.
Through this incident, I also found my attachments to validating myself and being competitive. I did not want to hear criticism; I only wanted to hear good things about myself. I decided to eliminate all these attachments and walk more diligently on the path of cultivation practice.