(Minghui.org) My name was put on the blacklist of the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) after I filed a criminal complaint against the former head – Jiang Zemin – for ordering the persecution of Falun Dafa. I then was harassed several times at home by CCP agents. They videotaped me and threatened to ransack my home.
My husband worked at the CCP’s administration offices. He was frightened because he knew the CCP could do anything to me. Between the intimidation, and my husband, I felt a lot of pressure. Hearing people walk by in the corridor or getting a knock at the door caused me to panic.
I was out of town in 2017 right before the CCP's 19th National Congress was held. CCP agents came to my home looking for me, but my husband would not let them in. I was not aware of this when I called my husband to tell him my plans to come home.
While on the phone, I saw a black substance, the size of my hand, floating towards me. I then heard my husband's nervous voice telling me not to come home. He said he would come to see me instead.
An inexplicable fear came over me, I was terrified. Even though it was daytime, I felt immersed in darkness. I calmed down and asked myself how I could be so afraid while talking to my husband on the phone?
My husband dropped everything and rushed to be by my side. He told me to stay away from home. I could see he was frightened.
Based on his personal experience and understanding of the CCP, my husband asserted that I would be arrested if I returned. I did my best to comfort him, and even though I was concerned, I told him not to worry. “I have Master Li's (the founder) protection.”
My husband started to quarrel with me and ordinary notions moved me. I saw my husband’s anger, fear, and exhaustion, and my heart was full of remorse and fear. He kept arguing with me, however, even when I tried to reason with him. He only became more upset.
What was happening here? I reflected on myself and looked for my own problems. I realized I had been trying to solve problems with ordinary feelings and ideas. I was wrong. The issue I was facing was not a matter between people; it was a matter of cultivation. It was a confrontation between righteousness and evil!
As a cultivator, we must eliminate the interference and deny any form of persecution. I was awakened. I realized that I needed to use wisdom and righteous thoughts to disintegrate the interference.
At the same time, I also found my strong attachment to my husband and to fear. I saw that I had not achieved a 100% belief in Master and Dafa. I was confused about what to do.
Then I thought of Master’s words in “Fa Teaching at the 2009 Washington DC International Fa Conference” from Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. IX:
“When this compassionate goodness emerges, its strength is without equal, and it will disintegrate any bad factors.”
“Compassion is an enormous energy, the energy of righteous gods. The more compassion that is present, the greater this energy becomes, and it can disintegrate anything that is bad.”
I began to understand that I needed to use “compassion” to solve this problem. “Compassion” has enormous energy, which can dissolve all the wrong factors. This was the righteous thought I should have.
I was, therefore, no longer driven by my husband’s behavior; I let go of my sentimentality for him. I needed to be responsible for him and embody kindness. With a calm voice, I further explained the truth about Falun Dafa to him.
My husband, who had been losing his temper, finally calmed down and became reasonable. He accepted my words, but remained worried. He was afraid that I would be persecuted, and our family would be destroyed.
He said he wanted to return home with me, but I told him to stay and rest up first. I again reassured him that I was protected, and there would be no problems.
He also said that I did not have the experience and ability to deal with those who did the harassing. I said they were the CCP’s administrative staff just like him, and they were being used by the CCP. I would treat them with kindness!
My husband realized he could not change my mind, so he just gave me advice, “Keep the door locked, and always check who is at the door before opening it. If you are arrested, do not say anything because the more you say, the worse it could be.”
I promised to follow his advice. My heart was unmoved because, at this time, I had no fear at all.
After returning home, the thoughts of being harassed or persecuted were completely gone. Only compassion filled my heart. Every day, I was surrounded by warm, peaceful energy. I was happy to do the three things required by Master. I felt fulfilled and assured!
As a result, no harassment or persecution occurred. I knew it was Master who helped me to resolve the tribulation. It was also the righteous thoughts given to me by Dafa that helped me go through that period smoothly.
Afterward, a fellow practitioner asked me why I had to come back at that time. I said there were still Dafa projects that needed to be done. Besides, this was my home. I have the right and freedom to go home according to my wishes. I didn't want to condone the fear, I wanted to disintegrate it!
