Cultivating Myself When Others Don't Accept What I Say
(Minghui.org) During my years of clarifying the truth about Dafa, I encountered people who not only did not quit the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) but also said things that were disrespectful of Dafa and Master. One practitioner said, “If you have given them the opportunity, don't force them.” Others have said, “There is always someone who can't be saved, and things can go wrong if one is not rational.” I originally held similar thoughts.
Master said, “Saving people is just that, saving people, and to pick and choose would not be merciful.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2009 Greater New York International Fa Conference”, Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. IX)
It seems that those who object to and are not willing to listen to the truth have been indoctrinated and deeply poisoned by the CCP. Although it is difficult for them to listen, they may change if we can make breakthroughs in our understanding of the Fa.
I once went to a market where I met a senior couple who sold goose eggs. While picking eggs, I clarified the truth. After I said a few words, both said that they didn't want to listen because they didn’t believe what I was telling them.
Before leaving, I said, “It's okay if you don't believe it. I don't object to this, as it may take some time to understand. Remember the phrases 'Falun Dafa is good, and Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good.' If you do, you will be blessed.” They did not say anything and turned away.
I looked within and found that I had an attachment of differentiating among people. I thought rural people were not educated and somewhat looked down on them. I corrected myself and sent forth righteous thoughts to clear out the evil spirits behind them. When I met this couple again, I told them with a smile that we must have a predestined relationship and that I would tell them phrases that offer blessings. The woman did not respond and just told me how good the eggs were.
I was very humble this time. Afterward, I thought, “The best way to clarify the truth to rural people is to chat rather than to lecture. The closer the relationship, the better the effect of clarifying the truth to them.”
When I went to the market for the third time, the husband greeted me and offered me the eggs at a discount. I said: “No, it is not easy for you to run a small business. I will pay the fair price.” He praised me for being kind.
When I clarified the truth to him this time, he listened and then quit the CCP. He said that his wife was at the other side of the market. I reminded him to tell her the two phrases, “Falun Dafa is good” and “Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good.”
Helping people understand the truth about Dafa requires persistence and rationality. Don't feel discouraged when you hit a wall. Look within and place yourself within the Fa.
I had a colleague who shared an office with me for many years and were like brothers. After the workplace was closed down, he was transferred to another workplace as the leader. After I began to practice Falun Dafa, he opposed it and told me that I had no fun in life as I didn't drink alcohol or go after women.
After I was released from a detention center for practicing Dafa, he cried and asked me to quit Dafa and have some fun. After seeing that I was still practicing Dafa, he got angry and rebuked me, saying disrespectful things about Master. I had clarified the truth about Dafa to him for nearly two decades. He didn't believe it, yet I could not bear to give up on him.
I looked within myself and found that I had a strong sentimentality for him. Every time I talked to him, I hoped he would change. The more I acted this way, the worse the effect. We often quarreled about it, and I was puzzled.
We once went out with a few friends. During dinner, I said just a few words about Dafa. He then challenged me, saying that I had no problem saying bad things about the CCP but got uptight when it had to do with Dafa. He said, “You guys still say you’re not involved in politics. How do you explain this?”
After that, I did not contact him for close to a year. I occasionally thought of him and then rejected the thought right away. I felt that it was interference, and I almost forgot about him.
Then, Master hinted about him three times in my dreams. The first time I dreamed of him, I didn't pay attention to it. The second time, I dreamed that he was standing at a door, and I stopped him as if I knew that he would die if he went out. I thought this was a hint to save him, but I was not sure how to do so. What if he rejected me again? I gave up thinking about it. The third time, I dreamed that he was talking to a person. When that person mentioned me, he did not object to it. This dream made me see that I was afraid of losing face, losing self-esteem, and so on.
I realized that when I clarified the truth to people, there was something in my subconscious mind. That is, I tended to jostle with people who wouldn’t listen to the truth. My underlying thought was: “I know better than you, so you can’t argue with me, and you have to listen to me.” The old forces took advantage of these attachments.
I called him and apologized: “I used to talk in a strict tone, which might have hurt you. I apologize to you. Are you still angry with me?” He said: “Only you are oversensitive and easily get upset. I’m fine.” I suggested we get together, and he agreed.
I went to a restaurant along with two friends and another practitioner. He asked me not to touch the subject or we would quarrel again. I responded that I would not quarrel with him.
I reminded myself not to act as I used to around him. I used to clarify the truth as if I were simply reciting the words and not giving the other party a chance to talk. I realized that it was important to make sure the other party was listening. Whether I clarify the truth well depends on my cultivation state, my tone, my kindness, and my cultivation level.
During the dinner, I did not lecture him. Master told me to look at the good side of a person. I praised his merits. I had never done that before. The other practitioner hardly ate anything. In addition to sending forth righteous thoughts, the practitioner told him some things about Dafa. My friend nodded and seemed to accept it.
On our way home, the other practitioner said, “Things went very well today. He also agreed to quit the CCP. This person is not like what you said. You have the attachment of sentimentality.” I agreed that I had not done well in the past.
“I can tell you, we're cultivators, so you need to treat all of the sentient beings around you as compassionately as you can. Perhaps some people's predestined opportunities haven't matured yet. Perhaps some people have been poisoned really deeply but can still be saved. Of course, there are also some who can't be saved, but the vast majority can be. Right now you can't tell them apart. I think that you absolutely shouldn't be discouraged or apathetic. Do this compassionately no matter who it is, and with a compassion that can melt steel you'll be able to do it well.” (“Fa-Lecture During the 2003 Lantern Festival at the U.S. West Fa Conference”)
Looking at how I fared compared to Master's Fa, I saw that my understanding didn't keep up with the Fa, and I did poorly. After this incident, I opened my mind a lot and let go of self.