Improving My Xinxing by Memorizing the Teachings
(Minghui.org) Practitioners in my local Fa study group discussed the importance of memorizing Zhuan Falun two years ago. We thought this was a good idea, as it would help calm our minds and the teachings would provide guidance for our cultivation.
I had tried memorizing Zhuan Falun but did not persevere and eventually gave up. I regretted it ever since.
Now I recite and memorize passages from the book from 6:30 to 7:30 a.m. and also in the evening after I return home from the group study, until midnight, when it is time to send righteous thoughts. I have gone through Zhuan Falun this way a dozen times during the past two years.
By memorizing the book, I can see the deeper meanings and keep having new understandings of the Fa. My character has definitely improved. When conflicts with other practitioners occur, I can remember the Fa pertaining to a particular issue and clearly see my problem. I also can better cooperate with others.
Looking Within When Facing Conflicts
An elderly practitioner was always critical of whoever disagreed with him. When he criticized me, I asked another practitioner if he thought that I was in the wrong. I was told to ignore the elderly practitioner, as he was always like that.
I knew, however, that his comment targeted some of my attachments or I would not have heard it. I looked inside and realized that I was prone to fighting back, arguing, and feeling jealous. Many of my attachments were the result of years of communist indoctrination. I immediately eliminated them.
During a discussion, after I expressed my opinion, the elderly practitioner said, “Someone always follows the Minghui website instead of following the Fa.”
I knew he said this to me. Although I did not say anything, I felt resentful and that I was being wronged. I was trying to come up with a response when I remembered Master [Li Hongzhi] said:
“But normally when a problem arises, if it does not irritate a person psychologically, it does not count or is useless and cannot make him or her improve.” (Lecture Four, Zhuan Falun)
I came to understand that this happened so that I could improve. It was such a wonderful opportunity.
Then another practitioner mentioned that the elderly practitioner criticized me behind my back. Again I was bothered and thought about talking to him.
Then I realized that I was trying to validate myself. I told myself I had to eliminate this attachment and truly follow the Dafa principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance.
In a group Fa study, the elderly practitioner said that he often forced his opinion on others. He was trying to change, he said, but sometimes he could not control himself. “I'm not as good as she is,” he said and pointed at me.
I said, “They are opportunities for us to improve.” He nodded and said he was trying to look within.
After I changed my attitude, he changed, too. He talks much more softly and is kinder than he used to be. We cooperate with each other very well.
Improving Family Relationships
After I started to practice Falun Dafa, my husband and my son witnessed the power of Dafa and started to practice, too. My daughter-in-law, after learning the truth about Falun Dafa, also joined the practice.
I noticed that my husband only read Zhuan Falun. He did not do the exercises or send righteous thoughts. I reminded him many times that he should do the exercises but he refused.
One day, I asked if he'd read the Dafa book that day. He told me to mind my own business and take care of myself, to which I responded, “How can you call yourself a practitioner if you only read Zhuan Falun without doing the exercises?” He got angry and stopped reading Zhuan Falun.
I looked inward and wondered why has this situation had lasted so long. Why couldn't he accept what I suggested? I kept pushing him to read the book and do the exercises. Wasn't that my sentimentality (qing) toward a family member? I was afraid he could not catch up with the process of the Fa-rectification. I was afraid something bad would happen to him if he did not do the three things well. It was all human sentimentality.
“If you are free from this sentimentality, nobody can affect you. An everyday person’s mind will be unable to sway you. What takes over in its place is benevolence, which is something more noble. (Lecture Four, Zhuan Falun)
I also realized that I did not act like a practitioner. I was not compassionate when I spoke to him and I required too much of him. I decided to speak to him kindly and only remind him in a way he could accept. I stopped pushing him and tried to understand from his point of view. Gradually, my husband changed. When I asked him again, he said, “I did. You help Master to validate the Fa. I will help you.” I corrected him, “You are helping Master and fulfilling your own vow.”
It was just like Master said: “Cultivation depends on one’s own efforts, while the transformation of gong is done by one’s master.” (Lecture Four, Zhuan Falun)
My son and his wife live in another city. They visit every two months. I knew that they seldom did the exercises. After I reminded my son, he told me to take care of myself and to mind my own cultivation.
My son's remark helped me understand that it was Master who was telling me that my son is under Master's care. Master helped me to give up my human attachments and improve my xinxing.
From then on, I have reminded myself that I will not interfere in their affairs and just treat them as fellow practitioners. When they come to visit, it is a good opportunity for us to share and improve together.