(Minghui.org) I am a 20-year-old Falun Dafa practitioner. I was born prematurely and didn’t physically develop as well as others. I was often sick, and frequent visits to the hospitals didn’t help. It wasn’t until I started to practice Falun Dafa with my mother in 2000 that my health dramatically improved.

Struggling with Being a Cultivator

Somehow I feel that it might have been too easy to obtain the Fa, as I didn’t appreciate it as much as I should have. I had a passive attitude when it came to doing the three things Master asked us to do. I did not see myself as a practitioner when in middle school and seldom studied the Fa. Although I was attached to many things of ordinary people, deep down I knew that I didn’t want to give up cultivation.

I signed up for a Dafa camp for college students when I was in high school. I was utterly moved by the stories in the plays and the meanings behind the group games. It was the first time I realized how lucky I was to have obtained the Fa and was determined not to deviate from the Fa again.

Master said,

“When one’s Buddha-nature emerges, it will shake ‘the world of ten directions.’ Whoever sees it will come to give a hand and help this person out unconditionally.” (Zhuan Falun)

The next summer, a practitioner asked me to join the same camp, and I was assigned to the team to produce plays. At the time I really wanted to turn it down. I was too shy to even speak in front of my class, let alone being an actor. However, I believed that Master had arranged it for me since there are no coincidences in cultivation. This could be an opportunity for me to eliminate my attachment to being afraid.

Little by little, I let go of self during rehearsal. I placed myself in the role I played with a sincere heart and wanting to move my audience.

Master said,

“Cultivation depends on one’s own efforts, while the transformation of gong is done by one’s master.” (Zhuan Falun)

I understood that only when I purify my thoughts could I help the audience to connect with the Fa. Indeed, many of my audience members were moved by the stories in the plays.

The hardest thing during the rehearsals wasn’t the acting but instead how to let go of self and work with others. It was more than just understanding the Fa principles but actually remembering them during face-to-face conflicts and in tests that seemed impossible to pass.

Master Gives Opportunities

I was determined that from then on I would never turn down any task that could help the Fa-rectification. A year later, I was asked to be a host for the camp, and that determination began to crumble. I thought that to be a host, one needs to be good-looking, have a good educational background, and be very eloquent. I was none of the above. It wasn’t about whether I was willing to help or not but whether I was capable of being involved in such a task.

I came to understand that the only role I needed to play well was being a practitioner. No matter what I did, it was always being a practitioner first. I dug further into my attachment of being afraid and found an attachment to comfort. I was used to taking orders instead of taking charge. I was so thankful that Master had given me opportunities to eliminate the attachments that were hidden so deep within me.

In my freshman year in college, I owned my first-ever single lens reflex camera because I’d always enjoyed photography. That summer a practitioner had me go to a training class for filming and editing offered by Sound of Hope. In that class, I practiced a lot and made many films. This summer, my cousin and I were asked to help make a promotional video for Shen Yun. After learning that the promotion period was only two weeks long, my human notions emerged, “How could there be any significant impact when it is only going to be promoted for two weeks? Perhaps I should forget it.”

I calmed down and rectified myself, thinking that Master had arranged all of this. I began to contact people I knew who understood how to make a film. There were constant tests, and with righteous thoughts, I was able to make the right decisions each time. All the bumps and tests were arranged by Master to have me strengthen my will and establish my mighty virtue. After the film was done, it was way better than I expected.

Keeping in Mind that I am Practitioner

When I helped out with the camps, I was always able to maintain righteous thoughts and act like a practitioner. Once I returned to school and entered society again, it was hard for me to stay that way.

Master said,

“But there are now demons here among men, since they have covertly incarnated in human form. And their numbers are great. But a great quantity of them are needed to smelt steel; otherwise the furnace wouldn’t have the kind of roaring fire, heat, or temperature needed. And so that’s the role they play in this world, trying to steer and destroy humanity with modern thought, with all sorts of tactics that corrupt people, and with a variety of different approaches. Many people have really fallen for it, especially young people. The evil ones have made students, especially college students, their main target of attack.” (“Teaching he Fa In Washington D.C. In 2018”)

Master’s words resonate greatly with me. Facing various degenerated messages every moment of the day, it is indeed difficult for young students to maintain righteous thoughts and follow the Fa principles constantly. We often get lazy and lost in the activities in school and all the modern messages from social media. Interactions with friends and online videos are quietly injecting me with degenerated values and elements.

After long-term exposure to such degenerated matter, without studying the Fa effectively to clear them out and know how far I had deviated, I often thought that it was I who wanted to watch the videos and that it wasn’t a big deal. This was how I gradually came to accept the modern ideas and when the old forces started to exploit the gaps.

Master said,

“Ordinary society’s morality was brought down this way through the exertion of subtle influences. It would not say, “I am the demon, and I am determined to make humankind slide down.” It would not say that. It leads you through subtle influences, using all kinds of things that are not righteous; you cannot see through it. This manifests in the arts, in conduct, in various kinds of products, and in all those things that attract all sides of you. It pulls you down, pulling you down as it stimulates your addictions. Once negative elements occupy people’s consciousnesses and social forms, humankind will be very hard to save, because people’s rationality is being controlled by negative elements, and in doing things they themselves cannot tell clearly whether those are their own thoughts.” (“Fa Teaching at the New York Fa Conference on the Twenty-Fifth Anniversary of Dafa’s Introduction to the Public”)

By writing this sharing article, I found my attachments and where I had failed. I was also able to cherish the environment in which I cultivate and am able to learn from other students who are practitioners.