The Importance of Guarding Our Every Thought
(Minghui.org) I couldn’t fall sleep after sending righteous thoughts at midnight on August 19, 2017. When I turned over, I suddenly felt like throwing up. I spit out some some saliva in the bathroom, then lay down again. Several minutes later, my stomach began to feel queasy, so I went to the bathroom again.
I squatted on the floor, feeling very nauseated. I then spit out some food that I had eaten earlier for lunch, leaving a bitter, acrid taste in my throat. Then my heart began to pound. I kept sending righteous thoughts, begging Master to save me.
Shortly after, I felt like I was going to both vomit and have diarrhea. I thought, “What am I going to do? The house has been without water for the whole day! I won't be able to clean myself up or flush the toilet.”
Since I started practicing Falun Gong almost 20 years ago, I've rarely experienced any sickness karma. I felt that the word “sickness” had nothing to do with me or my life.
"A human body should not become ill" (Lecture Three, Zhuan Falun).
So, whenever my body felt uncomfortable or painful somewhere, I never paid it any mind. As a result, my symptoms quickly disappeared.
However, this time it felt like my stomach had turned upside down! Mucus started dripping out of my nose and tears welled up, but I didn't have the strength to wipe myself off.
Suddenly, the face of a young practitioner flashed across my mind. Her body was hard and swollen for a long time before she passed away two weeks ago.
I then recalled reading a Minghui.org article detailing how a practitioner who had lived alone had died. People around him didn't even know that he had passed away. I thought, “I live alone, too!”
Then, I became alert and thought, “What am I doing? I'm a Dafa disciple. Master is by my side and has given me a Falun. All the gods in the universe are watching me. I cannot bring shame to Master!” With these thoughts, I stood up straight and wiped my face.
Identifying My Attachments
I then felt a cold sensation in my stomach, followed by the cessation of all of my symptoms. When I went back to my room, I discovered that about 30 minutes had passed.
I laid on my bed thinking, “Why didn’t I feel better after I mumbled, 'Master please save me?' Why was I okay only after I remembered that Master was really by my side?”
I suddenly understood. My first thought was that of an everyday person’s thinking: I wanted my pain to stop. My second thought revolved around seeing myself as a Dafa disciple.
I delved deeper into why this event had occurred. Then, I realized that I often had the TV on in the late evenings so that I wouldn’t fall asleep before sending righteous thoughts at midnight. Although I was watching NTDTV programs, I often watched their regular TV series, too.
Film and television dramas are meant to capture the hearts and sentiments of ordinary people. As practitioners, we have a hard enough time letting go of sentimentality, yet I was pouring it into my mind! How could the old forces miss such a glaring loophole? Cultivation is serious.