(Minghui.org) My cultivation state hasn't been very good lately. When I looked inward, I noticed that I had an attachment to comfort. Over the past few years, I often had the thought: “Tired? Take a break!”
Instead of dismissing the thought, I indulged in it. Over time, I would hit the snooze button on my alarm and go back to sleep in the morning. Thus, I didn't practice the exercises every day.
It was almost as if I had two voices in my head: one was telling me that I was a diligent practitioner, and the other was telling me that I needed to take a break.
Although I knew my cultivation state wasn't good, I found it hard to free myself from it.
I did not like doing the exercises during the winter months, simply because I was afraid of the cold. Looking inward, I noticed that my main consciousness was barely controlling my body on those occasions.
Master said,
“Some people’s master consciousnesses aren’t strong, and so they go along with the thought-karma and do bad things. They’re done for, and they fall. But most people can use their strong minds (their strong master consciousnesses) to get rid of it, to fight it. That shows that this guy can be saved, and that he can tell good from bad, and it means that his comprehension is good. My Law Bodies will help him remove most of that thought-karma. This situation is pretty common. When it comes up, it all depends on whether the person can overcome these bad thoughts. When you can stay steadfast we can eliminate karma.” (from “The Sixth Talk” in Zhuan Falun)
After reading Master's teaching, I suddenly awoke from my stupor. I then recalled a scene from my primary school years, when I used to get up at 6 a.m. to help clean the front door area. My aunt often praised me for doing this.
At first, I didn't understand why I had recalled this incident. I later realized that I got up early to help with the chores only because I wanted my aunt to praise me!
I then realized that the reason I got up early to practice the Falun Gong exercises, was to show everyone around me that I was a diligent practitioner.
Master said,
“Cultivation is something that falls upon you yourself, and nobody can do it on your behalf. A master can only, at least on the surface, tell you the Fa’s principles. It is incumbent upon you to cultivate your mind and sever the cords of desire, gaining the illumination of wisdom and removing all doubt. If you took up this path on an impulse, your heart is sure to be less than steadfast and you will surely lose your grounding when you venture out into the secular world. If you cannot hold firmly to your faith, you will end up with nothing after a whole lifetime. Who knows when another destined chance will come. They are hard to come by!” (“Be Steadfast” in Zhuan Falun Volume II)
I enlightened to the fact that after my fellow practitioners praised me, I would become very diligent for a while. Then, after some time, I'd become lax again.
I began to realize that I had attachments to both fame and comfort. The attachment to comfort got in the way of my saving sentient beings.
Master said,
“If you are still unclear about what a Fa-rectification disciple is, you won’t be able to step forward in the current tribulation, and you will be led by the human world’s pursuit of comfort to "enlighten" along an evil path. Master’s heart has always been pained by those who have fallen, and the majority were ruined by that pursuit.” (“Fa-Rectification Period Dafa Disciples” in Essentials for Further Advancement II)
What I learned from this experience is that we should treasure this cultivation path, study the Fa, do the exercises, and help clarify the truth.
We have to walk the last leg of this journey well and not let Master down!
Category: Improving Oneself
