Participating in Dafa Activities Has Helped Me Improve in Cultivation
(Minghui.org) I was involved in some activities to help raise awareness of Falun Dafa during this year’s Almedalen Week in Sweden. Almedalen is an important forum in Swedish politics where many people give speeches, hold seminars and host other events.
I also went with other Falun Dafa practitioners to travel around Sweden to let people know about Dafa.
Through these experiences, I made great strides in finding my shortcomings by looking within and letting go of my attachments.
Relying on Fellow Practitioners
I became sluggish in my cultivation a few months ago and could no longer do a full hour of meditation with both my legs crossed.
During Almedalen Week, two practitioners and I were asked to do the Falun Dafa exercises, including the one-hour meditation.
When I tried to meditate for an hour on the first day, my legs cramped up, and I was in excruciating pain. I lacked the courage to do it on the second day, so another practitioner took my place. However, that practitioner refused to take my place again, so for the next two days, I suffered great pain when doing the meditation exercise.
I was a little disgruntled, as I thought that practitioners always help others; how come this practitioner refused my request to take my place?
I recalled a dream that I had a couple of nights ago: I was airing clothes and dropped some on the ground. I asked two practitioners to help me pick them up. One practitioner picked one up, shook it, then put it back on the ground. I was shocked and complained to the other practitioner. This practitioner smiled but didn't reply.
I understood that this dream was a hint from Master, the founder of Falun Dafa: When facing tribulations, I should cultivate myself rather than relying on fellow practitioners. I must pass the test by myself.
“Ignore them! Once you give them up, you will find that the tribulations have become smaller and you have become bigger. You will overcome them in one step, and the tribulations will become nothing. It is guaranteed to be this way.” (Lecture in Sydney)
I calmed down and went to the promotion site. I felt that I was filled with energy when doing the meditation exercise, and time passed so quickly. The following day, I was able to meditate without feeling any pain.
As I don't speak Swedish, I was unable to converse with the public, so I demonstrated the Dafa exercises for many hours, which was rather tiring. I sometimes handed out fliers for a change but lacked the necessary communication skills. Thus, I really envied the other practitioners.
I felt frustrated and helpless, but I blamed myself for not studying the language. I also found excuses, such as being too busy making phone calls to mainland China to let the people there know about Dafa, as well as studying the Fa and doing the exercises.
I looked within and found the mentality of jealousy and seeking fame. It upset me to have to be in a support role due to my inability to speak the language, and my self-esteem and confidence took a nosedive.
“Jealousy is very serious, because it directly impacts whether we can cultivate to Perfection. If jealousy isn’t eliminated, all the thoughts you’ve cultivated become fragile. There’s a rule: a person who doesn’t get rid of jealousy while cultivating cannot achieve a True Fruition—he definitely won’t achieve a True Fruition.” (Zhuan Falun)
Master's words spurred me to send righteous thoughts to eliminate these bad thoughts; I had to reject them and deny them, as I must support the team.
Understanding the Meaning of Mighty Virtue
I found another attachment after looking within. I was asked to send righteous thoughts during an interview of two other practitioners. Many thoughts went through my mind when I found out that I was the only one doing so.
“How come only one person is sending righteous thoughts?” I thought. “Will my righteous thoughts be powerful enough? It would be better if other practitioners would join me.”
Again, my attachment of relying on others appeared. I tried to clear up my energy field, but my mind could not calm down.
It was drizzling and windy at the venue. My mind was so unstable that even a passer-by could disturb, annoy, or upset me. I was frustrated and wasn't focused on sending righteous thoughts.
As the practitioners were being interviewed, I realized that I should be sending forth righteous thoughts. My mind was clear, and my thoughts were powerful.
I looked within again and realized why I felt anxious. It was the pursuit of mighty virtue that made me feel nervous. I thought that clarifying the facts about Dafa was the only way to establish mighty virtue.
Now that I knew what was bothering me, I had eliminated another attachment.
Traveling Around Sweden to Let People Know about Dafa
When taking part in car trip around Sweden to let more people know about Dafa, my attachment to jealousy surfaced again. It had to do with a particular incident. I even thought of not participating in future activities like this because of that incident.
My mind was full of resentment and anger until we sent forth righteous thoughts near the Chinese Embassy. I heard a practitioner talking via a loudspeaker to the Embassy staff. I could feel that practitioner’s compassion and determination to help Master in Fa-rectification.
I thought to myself, “What am I doing? Dafa practitioners are helping Master rectify the Fa, while I am upset over some personal losses.”
I realized that my reason for sending forth righteous thoughts was selfish. It was to eliminate human attachments so I that could personally improve rather than to assist Master in Fa-rectification.
“...Dafa disciples are beings with missions, and so Dafa cultivation during the Fa-rectification period is different. If you are attached to personal cultivation, then that is considered an attachment!” (“Fa Teaching at the 2015 West Coast Fa Conference”)
I confessed to Master in tears, “Master, I was wrong!” Instantly, my negative thoughts were swept away. Thank you, Master!