China Fahui | Going Through Extreme Difficulties with Firm Belief in Master and the Fa
(Minghui.org) Within two years, I suffered two major physical traumas. In August 2016, both of my legs developed festering sores with a lot of pus, giving off a terrible odor. Gradually, a big hole appeared in my left leg, and I could no longer walk. I began to contemplate what had I done wrong to give the old forces an opportunity to exploit my gap.
1. Looking Within and Mending My Mistakes
A practitioner and I ran a material supply business. We never cheated anyone, and our business was booming. This led to having to attend more social events. As a result, I didn’t have enough time to really study the Fa, and my attachments gradually grew. I made a wrong decision by selling low-quality material to a customer, knowing that he was going to sell it as high-quality material to scam his customers. Though I didn’t sell phony material myself, I did allow it to happen. I didn’t do what Master says: “Puts a stop to its downward slide.” (“Illuminating All" from Hong Yin Vol. II)
Master taught us,
“For those who practice cultivation among everyday persons, what type of business you are in does not matter. Regardless of how much money you have, how high your position ranks, or what kind of private enterprise or company you run, it makes no difference, as you should trade fairly and maintain a righteous mind. All professions in human society should exist. It is the human heart that is indecent, rather than one’s occupation. There was a saying in the old days: "Nine out of ten merchants are fraudulent." That is a saying made by everyday people. I would say that it is a matter of the human heart. As long as your heart is righteous and you trade fairly, you deserve to earn more money if you make more effort. That is because you are rewarded for the effort you have put in among everyday people. No loss, no gain. You have worked for it.” ( Zhuan Falun)
As a Dafa practitioner, I must be upright when I run a business. I confessed to the practitioner what I did and stopped doing business with that customer.
One day, a practitioner reminded me of something that Master had taught us:
“He used to take home pieces of towels from the textile factory, and so did the rest of the employees. After practicing Dafa, instead of taking things home he brought back to the factory what he took home before.” ( Zhuan Falun)
I was awakened to the fact that it wasn’t enough to stop being involved with a scam; I shouldn’t have kept the money I earned from it. It made up a large portion of my assets, and I started to wonder if I could just give up part of it. In the end, I knew that I shouldn’t entertain such thoughts, nor should I keep any of that money. I donated all the money to a Dafa project.
I believe this was a major reason why I suffered greatly. The requirements for practitioners during the Fa-rectification period are very high, and the path for us is very narrow.
2. War Between Human Notions and Righteous Thoughts
When my legs started to develop the sores, I always wondered when it was going to end and why it was so incredibly painful. I was very negative and depressed. I was on the verge of a physical and mental breakdown. I sought to relieve the pain by human means. The practitioners around me also tried to help me with ordinary methods. One bought me a disinfectant. Another suggested I go to the hospital. I was surrounded by human emotions and passive thoughts of enduring the tribulation.
A practitioner brought a physician to my home. The doctor removed the festered flesh from my leg without giving me any anesthetic. I jerked and screamed in pain. The doctor suggested I go to the hospital for more tests and hinted that I might need an amputation. I refused.
My left leg became more and more swollen, and the festering worsened quickly. A lot of pus accumulated in the tissue. A practitioner who was also a nurse came twice a day to help me drain the pus. The process was extremely painful and only created more pus. Eventually, my wife had to do it herself on a regular basis. Nothing eased my pain; everything made it worse.
No matter how intolerable the pain was, I insisted on studying the Fa a lot, sending righteous thoughts, and doing the exercises every day. Gradually, my thoughts changed: “I am a practitioner and should conduct myself based on the Fa principles instead of human notions.”
Master says, “True cultivators have no illnesses, since my Law Bodies have eliminated them.” (“Explaining the Fa for Falun Dafa Assistants in Changchun” from Explaining the Content of Falun Dafa)
The worsening of my condition was an illusion, but it allowed me to realize that I did not fully believe in Master and the Fa. I treated myself like an ordinary person and felt hopeless. How could Dafa exhibit its supernormal power when all I did was turn to ordinary people for help?
“It's cultivation, so don't be intimidated by difficulties. No matter what, no matter how hard it is, you are definitely able to come through on the path given to you by Master. (Applause) As long as you raise your xinxing you can make it through.” (“Teaching and Explaining the Fa at the Metropolitan New York Fa Conference” from Teaching the Fa at the Conference III)
My head became clear. Wanting to relieve the symptom and the pain through ordinary means was like trying to solve divine problems with human methods. The next day I told the nurse practitioner that she didn’t have to come anymore. When she asked me about the pus in my legs, I told her that I wouldn’t think about it anymore. From then on, the amount of pus decreased each day.
Though the pain and festering were still there, now there was Fa in my mind. I no longer had fear or doubt. I no longer needed to endure the pain like an ordinary person. Each day, I studied the Fa, did the exercises, and sent righteous thoughts with a calm mind. I had a new understanding of Master’s words:
“No matter what it is you have encountered as you've gone about validating the Fa, it is all, I will tell you, a good thing--and that's especially so in these years of persecution--for those things have come about specifically because you do cultivation. Those ordeals and the suffering, no matter how great or harsh you find them to be, are good things, because they take place solely on account of your cultivation. A person can eliminate karma and shed human attachments when he goes through ordeals, and through ordeals he can improve.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2008 New York Conference” from Teaching the Fa at the Conference VIII)
3. Negating the Old Forces and Clarifying the Truth
I stayed at home because of my condition. One day, a practitioner told me that, of the three things practitioners needed to do, I didn’t clarify the truth. I realized that I had focused too much on my ailment and forgot my duty as a practitioner. I had to go out and help clarify the truth.
The first obstacle was getting downstairs. Every step was extremely difficult and painful for me. After I struggled downstairs, I tried to drive my car and then limped 700 meters to where I needed to go. The next day, I walked two kilometers. My understanding was that I must do what a Dafa practitioner does, and that was how I could negate the old forces' arrangements with my actions.
4. No Longer Afraid to Clarify the Truth Face to Face
Two local practitioners often rode their scooters to clarify the truth. When it snowed, I would take them to various places in my car. However, I never got out of my car to talk to anyone. One day, one of the practitioners told me that she used to be scared of face to face truth clarification, too. “Eventually, we all have to let go of our attachment to fear,” she said. The next day I got out of my car, walked into a shop, and helped six people quit the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) and its affiliated organizations. I was so excited and knew that Master was helping me.
When we distributed calendars, the practitioner had me walk in the front and told me to go where people were. My fear gradually lessened, and I felt more at ease. The swelling in my legs went down, the amount of pus became less, and the wound was closing up.
“Get rid of any attachment you have, and don’t think about anything. Just do everything a Dafa disciple should do, and everything will be covered.” (“Teaching the Fa at the Washington, D.C. International Fa Conference” from Guiding the Voyage)
About two weeks ago, I realized that I somehow accepted the fact the old forces existed, meaning that I allowed them to exist in me. I then thought, “My Master doesn’t acknowledge your existence. Neither do I.” As soon as I had this thought, the wounds on my legs closed up.
One day, while I was making calls to clarify the truth, something Master had said came into my mind:
“In practicing cultivation, you are not making real, solid progress on your own, which would effect great, fundamental changes internally. Instead, you rely on my power and take advantage of powerful external factors. This can never transform your human nature into Buddha-nature. If every one of you can understand the Fa from the depths of your mind, that will truly be the manifestation of the Fa whose power knows no boundary—the reappearance of the mighty Buddha Fa in the human world!” (“Cautionary Advice” from Essentials for Further Advancement)
A few days later, I had a vivid dream in which many people were fixing up the exterior of a factory. The next day, I described this to a practitioner, and he told me that I was only cultivating my surface, while my heart never changed.
I came to the understanding that Master was using the old forces to expose my problem. In the process, I went from cultivating on the surface to real cultivation. I went from knowing the Fa teachings conceptually to having a rational understanding of the principles. Initially, I had a hard time passing this test because I was constantly thinking with human notions.
In the first three months of the tribulation, though I constantly studied the Fa, looked within, and sent righteous thoughts, the pain and festering still worsened by the day. I felt hopeless. At this point, if a practitioner lost his righteous belief in Master and the Fa, it was very easy for him to turn against the practice. The old forces’ arrangement was to go beyond the practitioner’s limit, break his will, and destroy him. It was Master’s Fa principles that kept me steadfast and got me through the hardship.
5. Protected in a Car Accident
In June 2017, another practitioner and I were on a scooter on our way home. We had a head-on accident with a car. When I regained consciousness, the scooter was smashed and sitting on my legs. I vomited blood when I was hit, there was a large bump on my forehead, my nose was bleeding, and my teeth were loose. The other practitioner asked me if I was okay. We both thanked Master for saving our lives.
Half of the other car was ruined. The owner called the ambulance, but I refused to get in it. The paramedic told me that I was in critical condition and had to sign a waiver if I refused to go to a hospital. I did, and the ambulance left. The bystanders began chatting, and I heard one of them say, “I heard that Falun Gong practitioners are fine in situations like this.” It woke me up, and I knew that I needed to clarify the truth.
I told the bystanders that I was a Falun Gong practitioner and that, with Master’s protection, I would be fine. One of them went to the car owner and said, “He practices Falun Gong and will not take advantage of you for the damages. He’s badly hurt, and you should let him go home.” The car owner insisted we wait for the police to arrive.
When the police came, he was surprised that I was still there despite my terrible condition. I told him that I was a practitioner and didn’t need to go to the hospital. I then said, “I was going too fast, and that was why we collided at the turn.” Seeing that I wasn’t trying to accuse the other driver despite my injuries, the officer gave me a thumbs up. He told the car owner, “You are partly responsible for this accident. With his injuries, you would have to spend a lot of money had he chosen to go to the hospital.” In the end, the car owner decided that we would each take care of our own losses.
Another practitioner came on a scooter to pick me up. As soon as I got on the scooter and relaxed, I couldn’t stop vomiting blood. I felt near death at that moment, but I wasn’t scared. I was determined to walk the path Master arranged for me until the end, and I wanted to go home with Master.
The practitioner managed to get me home. I kept vomiting blood, and my nose was still bleeding. My breath and my body were cold. My wife got several practitioners to come and help send righteous thoughts. I managed to cross my legs despite the extreme pain and sent righteous thoughts to eliminate the old forces’ interference. In my mind, I knew that, no matter what I did wrong, the Fa would rectify me and that none of the old forces was worthy of testing me, a Dafa practitioner.
An hour later, I saw that the practitioners look relaxed. They told me that the color had returned to my face and that I should be fine. I felt very thirsty and grabbed a bottle of cold water. Suddenly, I wasn’t sure that if I should drink or eat anything because I'd just vomited blood. I realized that I shouldn’t be restricted by human notions. I drank the water and felt great. I felt hungry and began to eat as much as I could, not worried about my nose bleeding or anything.
The next day, I began to do the exercises. I tried my best to hold my arms up. I asked Master for help and was able to cross my legs despite the pain. My knees, legs, and feet became very swollen, but I refused to acknowledge the appearance of sickness. I did what I needed to do as a practitioner. Soon, I completely recovered.
Last year, when my legs festered, I studied the Fa a lot and sent righteous thoughts. I was able to truly clarify the truth to people and negate the old forces’ arrangement. The process laid a solid foundation for me and raised my xinxing level.
After the car accident this year, I had almost no human notions in the recovery process. I believed in Master and the Fa and completely negated the old forces. With Master’s help, I passed this test quickly. Master says,
“There is no affect between master and disciple
The Buddha’s grace remolds Heaven and Earth
When disciples have ample righteous thoughts
Master has the power to turn back the tide”
(“The Master-Disciple Bond” from Hong Yin Vol. II)
I'm thankful for Master’s compassionate salvation and the practitioners who took care of me and helped me improve in my cultivation.