(Minghui.org) I began to practice Falun Dafa in 1997. My husband had two extra-marital affairs, and my marriage was in shambles. Through cultivation, I was able to eliminate my attachments to sentimentality and overcome the difficulties in my marriage.
First Marital Crisis
My husband wanted a divorce after his first extra-marital affair. I did not want to divorce because our son was young. I talked to other practitioners about my situation. They said either it was time to eliminate my attachment to sentimentality, or our marriage had run its course.
We filed for divorce. The court ruled that my husband would pay me six months of alimony, but I did not take it.
My father-in-law was bedridden, so I took the responsibility to care for him and bathe him.
My husband's girlfriend once fell ill while he was out. So I took her to the doctor and lent her 500 yuan for her treatment. She was very grateful. I explained that Master Li, the founder of Falun Dafa, taught us to follow the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance and to treat others accordingly.
She later left my husband. My husband knew he was wrong and came back to me. He also gained positive understandings about Falun Dafa.
After the persecution began in 1999, his supervisor asked him if I was still practicing Falun Dafa. My husband responded, “Falun Dafa is good for one's health. Sometimes she does the sitting meditation at home.”
He said to me when he came home, “If you were not practicing Falun Dafa, you would not be so nice to me.”
My faith in Master and Dafa helped me overcome this tribulation.
Second Marital Crisis
The good times did not last long. Several years later, I encountered a second wave of tribulations. This time it hurt me even more.
After our first divorce, my husband asked me for forgiveness and wanted to remarry.
A few years after we remarried, he found another girlfriend. They rented a place together, saying they needed to farm the land together. He stayed with her on weekends and holidays.
I felt hurt, and all sorts of human emotions emerged. One night the girlfriend called and said a man was making advances toward her. She said she was afraid to be alone in the evening and wanted my husband to keep her company.
I told my husband about the phone call when he came home, and he went to her place. I felt very emotional, and my mind was in turmoil.
I forced myself to read Zhuan Falun. I was alerted when I read this part,
“You feel in your heart that it is unfair, “How can this person treat me like this?” Then why did you treat this person that way in the past? You might claim that you actually did not know it at that time, and this life has nothing to do with the other life. That does not work.”
I probably did them wrong in a past life, so I should not blame them now. I should resolve the problem with compassion.
I talked to them, and hoped they would act responsibly to both families. I asked the girlfriend to think about her children and her reputation.
My husband quibbled, “Who does not accept this kind of arrangement nowadays! Am I not good to you? I give you all my salary, so am I not being responsible to our family?”
I had a discussion with my husband after he came home.
I said, “Since you like her, you should be responsible to her. Why don't we divorce?”
My husband got upset, and said, “Why divorce? If I went along with your request, our family would have split a long time ago!”
My husband wanted to have both the family and the girlfriend. He was lustful and eventually developed heath issues. I was worried about him.
Master said,
“I often say that if all a person wants is the well-being of others and if this is without the slightest personal motivation or personal understanding, what he says will move the listener to tears.” (“Clearheadedness” from Essentials for Further Advancement)
For the sake of my husband, I had to change myself first in accordance with the Fa principles. I was able to see his shortcomings. So I looked inward to see if I had attachments to lust and desire, and got rid of them one by one.
A year later, I walked out of the quagmire of sentimentality and desires. My husband turned around, and my family life was peaceful again.
I treated his girlfriend as my sister. I took care of her when she had surgery and no one else could take care of her. I told her that Falun Dafa gave me health and guided people to be a good person. I suggested that she recite, “Falun Dafa is good! Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good!” I told her that as long as she followed the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance, she would become healthy.
I also helped her withdraw from the Chinese Communist Party and its affiliated organizations. She was very grateful.
She said, “You are so good to me. Please give me some time, and I will stop seeing your husband.”
She later left my husband and sought employment elsewhere.
I overcame the second family crisis with a lot of difficulty. In retrospect, it was very hard emotionally. Had it not been for Master and Dafa, I would not have been able to come through. Under Master's protection and Dafa's compassion, I became mature. I often share the wonders of Dafa with those around me.
Category: Improving Oneself
