Making Choices Based on Compassion, Not Sentimentality

(Minghui.org) Last weekend I was invited to read my article and participate in an experience sharing conference and activities in a neighboring country. However, as we’ve been quite active lately throughout the country collecting signatures to sue former Chinese leader Jiang Zemin, I felt I’d have to consider my wife, who does not practice Falun Gong, and not leave her alone at home.

But then, she unexpectedly declared her own travel plans for the weekend: she would go to a lawyers' conference. That sounded perfect: "If she goes, I can go!" Plane tickets were very cheap, accommodations were free, and the flight schedule was ideal–I wouldn’t be away from my regular job.

Another thing was that my usual Saturday exercise time with new practitioners in my city had been cancelled for some reason. Everything seemed like Master’s arrangement for me to get to the conference.

But in the end, my wife’s plan didn’t work out, so I decided to stay home. I felt sad.

The Friday before I was supposed to have gone, I shared in a local Fa-study group of how I was going to miss the activities over the weekend. Another practitioner reminded me about our regular exercise time in the park on Sunday. I tried to focus on that. The weather forecast was for sunny weather, so I used the opportunity to invite new practitioners to join us in the park.

But dense fog covered the city on Sunday, totally out of the blue, and no one came.

When I complained to my wife about the meaningless weekend at home, saying to her: "Why didn’t you go to the lawyers' conference so that I could go to the Fa conference?" She answered straightaway, "Why didn’t you go to the Fa conference so that I could go to the lawyers' conference?"

That’s when I realized it was wrong for me to leave the decision about my involvement in a Dafa activity to others, instead of doing what I thought was right and let Master’s fashen arrange everything else.

Actually, I’ve noticed my Dafa plans too often depended on the needs of my wife (or my notions about her needs) or the needs of others close to me, each time with the excuse that I was "thinking of others."

Now I’m clear that that mentality is actually selfish. We don’t get involved in Dafa activities for our own sake, but for the sake of sentient beings. If we miss an activity because we are worried about interpersonal conflicts, isn’t that a xinxing problem and lack of faith in Master?

"Those who are attached to affection for family will definitely be burned, entangled, and tormented by it," as Master said in "Cultivators’ Avoidances" in Essentials for Further Advancement.

We shouldn’t make excuses, hiding behind Fa-principles. For Fa-rectification Dafa disciples, we have to be considerate of all people, not just our family members. I believe that if we do the right thing with true compassion for our family members and for others, our family members will understand and support our efforts.

This is my present understanding.