(Minghui.org) I recently dreamed about being unable to answer questions on a test. My wife told me that it meant it was time for me to write about the interference I experienced when I began practicing Falun Dafa, which would help those who are facing the same problems as I had, so I have decided to do so.
My wife began practicing Falun Dafa in 1997. I was against it at first because she stopped going dancing with me and having fun. She woke up early to join the group exercises and when she got off work, she couldn't wait to rush to the group Fa study. We didn't have much time to talk, let alone any sex life. I was lonely.
I threatened to divorce her, but she wouldn't give up Dafa. I stopped doing any housework, but she did it all. She didn't yell or lose her temper. She also became very healthy. I was speechless and became curious about Falun Dafa. I picked up the book Zhuan Falun and read parts of it. I knew it taught you how to be a good person. From then on, I supported my wife on her decision. I helped cook the meals so she could have more time to study and exercise.
Though I learned a lot from Dafa, I was still skeptical. Being polluted by ordinary society, I felt that a practitioner had to suffer too much, and I would rather be an ordinary person. I went to dance clubs when I had time and met a partner. We became really friendly. My wife found out in time and stopped me. She remained calm and kind and didn't make a big deal out of it. She protected me and my reputation.
Seeing How Noble Practitioners Are
I saw the noble side of a Dafa practitioner and I was moved. I wanted to study the Fa with her, so every night I went to the Fa study group, but I often fell asleep while they were reading. My snoring started to bother other practitioners. I quit going to the Fa study session, but every time Teacher had a new article published I still read it. I knew that Falun Dafa was good and how righteous that Teacher was.
After the persecution started, I went out to distribute Falun Dafa informational fliers with my wife. She was arrested many times by the police, and I tried my best to rescue her. I helped in many ways, and shouldered pressure from many people. I supported my wife in buying computers, printers, and DVD burners, so that she could make materials to clarify the truth. Teacher said,
“To put it more clearly, right now during the Fa-rectification, no matter how great are the sins sentient beings have committed or how grave are the mistakes they made in the past, the only thing that is looked at is the attitude that they have toward Dafa and Dafa disciples during the Fa-rectification period.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2007 New York Fa Conference”)
Perhaps this is why Teacher never gave up on me during all this time.
Two years ago, despite the fact that we had little money, my wife saved some money and bought me a car, since my office was far from home and it took me a long time to get there by bus. I thus had more time on my hands.
Giving Into Temptation
A woman came to seduce me. My evil thoughts dominated, plus I had not had a sex life for many years, and I committed adultery. Before this all took place, I contracted a disease in the genital area and it couldn't be cured. My wife said that it was because I had the attachment of lust, and Teacher was trying to prevent me from doing the wrong thing. My wife wanted me to practice and I tried again. I still couldn't stop myself from falling asleep during Fa study. She sent righteous thoughts for me but I wasn't strong myself. Once I felt sleepy, I went to bed without a fight. After a while I quit again. I only did the exercises but did not study the Fa.
Teacher said,
“If you only practice the exercises without improving xinxing and without the powerful energy that strengthens everything, it cannot be called cultivation practice; neither can we treat you as Falun Dafa disciples. If you go on like that without following the requirements of our Falun Dafa and behave yourself as usual among everyday people without upgrading your xinxing, you may still run into some other troubles though you practice the exercises. You may even claim that it is the practice of Falun Dafa that makes you go astray. This is all possible.” (Zhuan Falun)
The woman frequently called me asking me out. Every time we committed adultery, I regretted it and blamed myself. I wanted to stop it but every time I saw her, I lost my self control. After a while, my wife found out. This time she was really hurt and almost collapsed. She told me that she would have gone insane had she not been a Falun Dafa practitioner. She said that she wanted a divorce, but that would have a negative effect on Dafa's reputation and she did not want that.
I felt terrible seeing her in a very disturbed emotional state. However at the same time I blamed her for not being considerate of me. She only cared about her practice, and what I did was a result of not having a sex life at home for years. Teacher said,
“As our practice is spread more widely in the future, those practitioners of ours who practice cultivation among everyday people should not all be turned into quasi-monks. It is not allowed for every Falun Dafa practitioner to become this way. In the course of practice, we require the following of everyone: Even though you practice and your spouse might not, it is not permitted for you to get a divorce because of the practice. In other words, we should take this matter lightly, and you should not attach as much importance to it as do everyday people.” (Zhuan Falun)
“Desires, lust, and things of these sorts are all human attachments, and all of them should be given up.” (Zhuan Falun)
Becoming a True Practitioner
With so much pain and pressure, my wife forgave me again and didn't tell anyone. She had such great tolerance because she was a practitioner. I became determined to practice Falun Dafa this time. I saw that Dafa was the only pure land, and the only way for me to leave this ordinary society.
I told my wife what I thought and she was happy for me. I knelt down in front of Teacher's photo. I dared not look up because I was so ashamed of myself. I told Teacher that I would correct everything that I had done wrong, and be a true practitioner. I wanted to return to my true self and my true home. I asked Teacher to forgive me, and that I wanted to be his disciple.
From then on, every day I studied the Fa with my wife, sent righteous thoughts, and helped in clarifying the truth. Teacher quickly purified my body. I had dream after dream testing my attachments of lust and desire. Most of the time I passed the tests. I finally experienced the joy of being part of Falun Dafa.
I wish the men whose wives are Falun Dafa practitioners can treat them with kindness. They are pure, kind, and noble lives that Falun Dafa created in this world. You have a predestined relationship with Falun Dafa if you married a practitioner.
