(Minghui.org) Greetings venerable Master! Greetings fellow practitioners!
When I was in China, my family members used their mobile phones to inform people about Falun Gong and the persecution. As soon as my mother and I came to Australia, we decided to join a project. Since we were familiar with using our mobile phones, we did not hesitate and joined the RTC truth clarification platform.
However, as soon as I started, I encountered difficulties. Although I said I was going to make phone calls, I wasn't able to make breakthroughs. I didn't have a sense of urgency even though I watched my mother improve daily while making phone calls.
Practitioners on the RTC platform encouraged me to start making calls. I finally made my first call, but as I listened to the first ring, many complicated attachments rushed into my mind. The person on the line appeared to be very interested in what I had to say. That gave me confidence. I gradually became open-minded. I would speak for a while and ask the person: “Isn't the situation just as I said?” He would reply that the things I said were correct.
During that period of time, after school and on Saturdays and Sundays, I went on the platform and joined practitioners to make phone calls. I also managed to overcome my attachment to fear at school. I was able to ask my teachers to sign a petition calling for an end to the Chinese Communist Party's (CCP's) forced organ harvesting atrocities, and I also gave them Shen Yun DVDs. They were happy to sign. With Master’s help my English dramatically improved, and my cultivation path became steady.
Gaining Confidence
I made phone calls to people for a period of time before I joined the Global Rescue platform phone team, which is a team that solely makes calls to people who participated in the persecution.
I once made a call to the director of the Education Bureau. After the call went through, I introduced myself and told him the reason I was calling, which was to ask him to stop spreading slander about Falun Dafa in schools. He listened for a short while and then hung up the phone.
I kept calling him until he picked up the phone again. I told him that Dafa is practiced by people in more than 100 countries around the world, however, China is the only country that has banned the practice. I also told him that in Taiwan several hundred thousand people practice. I explained that Dafa teaches people to cultivate their hearts, and that the founder of Falun Dafa has been given over 3000 proclamations, supporting resolutions and letters.
The director listened quietly. I further explained that the Tiananmen Self-immolation was fabricated and staged, and that the entire incident was suspicious. I also pointed out to him that in history people who persecuted religious believers did not have a good ending. I used the example of the fall of the Roman Empire that was destroyed after persecuting the Christians.
I advised him that as head of the Education Bureau, he should educate students with true and accurate information. After listening, he said he agreed with what I told him. I told him that he was compassionate as he was able to listen to the truth. I also said that Gods and Buddhas had not given up on him. Finally, I said I hoped he would make the right choice.
I also frequently made calls to the 610 Office, prisons, labor camps, brainwashing centers and other institutions that persecuted practitioners. One police officer told me that they were only doing this because it was part of their job and because of the money. I told him that he didn't need to go against his conscience just to make a living. I gave him examples of people who had received retribution after persecuting practitioners. I also explained that the East German soldiers who killed people at the Berlin wall were unable to use the defense that they were just “executing orders” when they were put on trial. The officer accepted what I told him.
Many people could understand, however, there were also people who refused to listen. During the process of making calls, I’ve encountered people who scolded me, and shouted at me.
My Competitive Mentality Surfaces
My competitive mentality would flare up when I talked to these people. But I started to feel pity for them after talking to a number of them. Fellow practitioners told me that if the person scolded me severely, I should tell them that the phone call was being recorded and could be used against them.
A few days later I encountered another police officer. He scolded me throughout the duration of the call. I was not moved at the beginning. I continued to clarify the facts to him. But after he continuously scolded me for over 20 minutes, I thought that it wasn't right. I decided to tell him that the call was being recorded. He continued to scold me. I then replayed some of the recordings to him. He told the surrounding people who were also listening that I had recorded the call and hung up the phone.
I did not feel comfortable after that call. I looked within and realized that I had an attachment to utilizing my own reasoning to defeat others. I was uncomfortable because I had a competitive mentality, I was unsatisfied with the result and I was attached to protecting myself.
During my daily cultivation, I encountered large and small xinxing tests that hindered my progress in saving people and cultivating myself. The temptations in society inevitably distracted me from cultivating and would pull me down when I wasn't paying attention.
My heart for cultivation naturally became weaker when I paid more attention to other aspects in my life. As I became older, I watched my friends pursue the lifestyles they wanted. Some entered universities. some found girlfriends, others started working, and some were shuttling between interpersonal relationships. Some of my friends whose family conditions were good wasted their time. For a long period of time I felt lost.
I started to ask myself: Would my cultivation be able to achieve the criteria for consummation? Have I demonstrated outstanding behavior in ordinary human society? Would I end up achieving nothing? I had so many attachments! If I didn’t cultivate well and also failed at being an ordinary person, what am I going to do?
I kept asking myself these questions. My university entrance exams were coming up and my results were not as great as what was expected of a cultivator, therefore, I didn’t know whether I would be able to enter a university. I didn’t know what my future held. Since I was facing a lot of temptations in ordinary human society and wasn't able to let go of attachments, I didn’t know how to cultivate anymore. I realized that it was the old forces’ interference. They forced me to make a choice between cultivating and living a life as an ordinary person.
Trapped in the Clutches of My Attachments
The interference at that time made me feel restless and troubled. I lost self-esteem. I kept thinking that whatever I did, I wasn't doing it well. Therefore I felt I could not cultivate well or even meet the standards of an ordinary person. My attachments all came up at once.
I felt that I was trapped in the clutches of my attachments. I always wanted to go out and play games with my fellow classmates. I even wanted to find a girlfriend. I wanted to do things that made me feel comfortable. However, as soon as I was distanced from the Fa, I felt lethargic. The feeling of being immersed in ordinary people’s seven emotions and six desires was terrible.
There was an intense struggle within my heart. My righteous thoughts were sometimes strong and sometimes weak. I hated myself for failing to do well. Even though my cultivation and my life were not balanced, I still could not let go of my ordinary human attachments. I even broke down because of this. I cried because I failed to do well. I also cried because I could not remove my attachments.
After a few weeks of feeling lost and aimless, I decided that this could not go on. I resolved to study the Fa after school. I would send forth righteous thoughts whenever I had time. I initially could not maintain a tranquil mind. Attachments would pop up when I thought about studying the Fa. However, I didn’t give up and kept studying.
It was my turn to host the Sydney Global Rescue phone team a few weeks later. I had not made a phone call for a while. I thought to myself that I needed to do well hosting the phone team. I couldn’t let my cultivation state hinder fellow practitioners from saving people. Studying the Fa for a while and sending forth righteous thoughts had helped. My heart immediately became tranquil after entering the platform. Many distracting thoughts disappeared. This sudden change surprised me. After making the phone calls, my heart felt light and clear.
Breaking Through My Attachments
I also developed righteous thoughts. I thought to myself: I am a cultivator. When attachments arise, am I not supposed to eliminate them? If I cultivate well, would I still be afraid of not studying well? Moreover, on a cultivator’s perspective and at my young age, finding a girlfriend would not be a wise option. I should do what I need to do. Everything would naturally improve if I steadfastly cultivate myself. I was happy! I managed to break through! From that point on, different attachments still popped up, however, they appeared much weaker.
As I walk my cultivation path, I have encountered ups and downs and my righteous thoughts have at times been both strong and weak. I concede that I have many attachments that I shouldn’t have at this age. These caused me to fall several times. However, every time when my attachments were too strong or when I lost confidence in my cultivation and myself, Master used countless ways to awaken me. He would help me develop more righteous thoughts and strengthen me. Every time I think about this, I weep tears of gratitude.
I'm so grateful for Master’s compassionate care. If it hadn’t been for Master’s care, I would have sunk down to an ordinary human’s level. I’ve participated in the RTC platform for around two and a half years now. I’ve been cultivating myself when making phone calls and in my daily life. I've eliminated a number of attachments. Even when I've stumbled I never stopped picking up the phone to make calls in order to save people. This is because as long as I honor my vow and cultivate myself well I'll be able to remove any bad state of mind and cultivate well.
Thank you Master for your care and for being the beacon on my cultivation path by guiding me forward.
Thank you Master! Thank you fellow practitioners!
(Presented at the 2014 Australia Falun Dafa Experience Sharing Conference)
