(Minghui.org) I did not know until today that I had such a big shortcoming: I judge things according to my own feelings instead of from the standpoint of Dafa. For example, if I feel that one person is good, I will treat him as a friend and with all my heart; if I feel the person is bad, I will shut myself off and treat him as only a stranger. Because I regard the person negatively, I take a guarded stance when interacting with him. I behaved like this even before I practiced Falun Gong, but after starting to practice I still did not realize that this is wrong. So I continued interacting in this way with fellow practitioners until I came to the realization today.
When the persecution of Dafa was at its most severe, practitioners stopped visiting one another. I only studied the Fa and practiced the exercises by myself at home. In 2003, I met another practitioner. After getting along with her for a while, I judged that she was good according to my feelings. When I sent forth this thought, I began to treat her wholeheartedly and helped her improve based on the Fa. I always thought of her and liked being with her. Whenever someone else said something bad about her, I would defend her. However, one day this practitioner said a lot of bad things about me in front of others. When word spread to me later, I knew that I was trapped in qing, but I did not dig deeper to find the origin or remove the attachment.
After a period of time, I met an elderly practitioner. After getting along with her for a while, I felt that she was a very good person. Similarly, I treated her closely and unknowingly fell into qing again. One time, when I was in a conflict and told her about my hardship, instead of helping me enlighten with Fa principles, she retorted, “How you deal with it is your own business. I cannot get involved.” When I heard this, I was very disappointed. I did not know what was wrong. Why did I treat people sincerely, only to receive such repayment? Later, I tried to look within myself. I only found that I had the attachment of qing toward fellow practitioners. Once again, I did not dig deep enough, and the attachment continued to exist.
Later, I met another elderly practitioner. At first, I treated her in the same way as I treated the two earlier practitioners because I thought she was good. But one day I heard something about her from another practitioner that led me to believe that this practitioner frequently told lies. What she thought was different from what she said. So I reminded myself to let go of the qing toward fellow practitioners, but I did not know how to get along with her. Later, I pointed out her shortcomings. However, she said that I was putting bad substances on her. I really did not know what I did wrong. I treated others kindly. Why couldn't I be understood?
I thought about this problem all the time and suddenly realized that I regarded all my interactions with others, no matter fellow practitioners or everyday people, using the standard of my own emotions and feelings rather than the standard of “Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance.”
After I understood this, I changed the way I treat people. One day, I met a classmate that I haven’t been in contact with for years. When I met her, I let go of my old notions of her not treating me well in the past. I took the initiative to talk to her and treated her as a sentient being. After doing it this way, I felt that we were in harmony. It is like Master said,
“If you are free from this sentimentality, nobody can affect you. An everyday person’s mind will be unable to sway you. What takes over in its place is benevolence, which is something more noble.” (Zhuan Falun)
Category: Improving Oneself
