Tax Bureau Director's Path of Returning to His True Self
(Clearwisdom.net) I am 47 years old and obtained the Fa in 1998 while I was a deputy director of the local tax bureau. During the past 10 years, I personally experienced the wonders of Dafa, as well as the brutal persecution launched by the communist regime in 1999. I would like to share my cultivation experience with fellow practitioners.
I always pondered the meaning of life: Where did I come from, and where am I going? After I found a job in the local tax bureau, my life did not turn out as I had expected, and I became very depressed. I started to smoke, drink and gamble. Contemporary society is like a huge dye vat, and the environment in the tax bureau was even worse.
Obtaining the Fa
In 1998, a relative recommended Zhuan Falun to my mother, who had been suffering from hypertension and heart disease for a long time. The relative said that many people's illnesses disappeared after reading the book. After I started reading this precious book the first time, I could not put it down. I was stunned that Master answered all the questions that had confused me for decades. I kept reading until three o'clock in the morning.
Master's words made a profound impression on me:
“... being human isn’t the meaning of life—it’s to have you return to your original, true self, to go back.” (Zhuan Falun)
Finally, I understood the true meaning of life, which I had sought for a long time. I had a new idea of what kind of a person I should be in the future. Ever since then, I have been walking on the path of returning to my true, original self.
On the first day of cultivation, I let got of my three bad habits - smoking, drinking and gambling - which really surprised my friends and colleagues. I stopped going out to drink with my boss, and he was not happy about this. I explained to him that Falun Gong helped me purify my body and I needed to get rid of all the habits that would hurt my health. As time went by, my friends and colleagues understood and got used to the new, improved me. I have not gone out drinking with my customers either. I used to play mahjong a lot and stayed out late at night, which caused a lot of frustration for my wife. There were lots of conflicts between my mom, my wife and I. My wife and I ended up getting divorced because I always lost money while gambling. I had tried many times to quit smoking, drinking and gambling, but I was too attached to these vices. After I started practicing Falun Gong, however, it became very easy for me to let go of the bad habits and I felt very comfortable doing so.
I knew many fellow practitioners, especially the elderly ladies, who had started smoking when they were just kids, and continued for 50 years. When they started practicing Falun Gong, however, they quit smoking in just a few days and never smoked again. This seemed amazing, but was very common among Falun Gong practitioners.
After I became a practitioner, I refused bribes of tens of thousands of yuan from my customers. Many customers told me that good people like me were really hard to find these days. I replied that I was honest and incorruptible because I practice Falun Gong. After the Chinese communist Party (CCP) began persecuting practitioners, I was held in a forced labor camp for petitioning in Beijing for the right to practice Falun Gong. Many of my customers drove hundreds of miles to visit me.
Breaking through barriers and firmly walking on the path of cultivation
After the persecution started in 1999, I did not know what to do. I was confused and afraid. But I firmly believed in Master and Dafa. I was illegally arrested five times and held in a forced labor camp twice for clarifying the facts about Dafa. At the time, I did not have a clear understanding of the Fa principles and thought that practitioners should just forbear the persecution.
With many human attachments and the pursuit of being enlightened, I went with some fellow practitioners to Beijing to appeal. We were taken to Fengtai Stadium and sent back to our hometown. I spent a night at the local police station, and the next morning my boss took me to the local tax bureau. I was interrogated and threatened by my boss; I was told that no one would bail me out if I was detained again. My mom was so afraid that she became very sick. My brother and sister were worried that if I lost my job, I wouldn't have the means to survive. Later on, I was held in the detention center for hosting a cultivation experience sharing conference. My home was ransacked by the authorities. I talked with fellow practitioners about the persecution and we decided that we should clarify the facts about Dafa to government officials. However, plainclothes police always followed me, and I was afraid that if I went to Beijing again, I would be held in jail and probably sentenced to many years of imprisonment.
I remembered Master's words:
“My truly cultivating disciples, what I have taught you is the Fa for cultivation of Buddha and Dao. Nonetheless, you pour out your grievances to me over the loss of your worldly interests, rather than feeling upset for being unable to let go of ordinary human attachments. Is this cultivation? Whether you can let go of ordinary human attachments is a fatal test on your way to becoming a truly extraordinary being. Every disciple who truly cultivates must pass it, for it is the dividing line between a cultivator and an everyday person.” (“True Cultivation,” Essentials for Further Advancement)
After looking inward, I felt it became easier for me to let go of all of my human notions and attachments. In September 1999, we managed to get to Beijing. There we shared with fellow practitioners from other places and talked with many policemen about the wonders and beauty of Dafa. With our actions we showed the authorities that we would steadfastly continue our cultivation.
When I came back, I was held in the detention center for 15 days and then monitored by the guards in my workplace for two weeks. Altogether, 60 people took turns watching me. Six people monitored me during the day shift and four people did so during the night shift. Every day, 10 people took turns trying to pressure me to renounce my faith. My mom was very sick at home and my child had heart disease, but I was not allowed to return home to be with them. Instead, they assigned a police officer to monitor my family, as well.
In 2005, I was illegally arrested for sending people messages with the facts about Dafa. I did not cooperate with the police; I didn't answer their questions or sign any documents. I refused to recite the regulations or put on clothing intended to be worn by criminals. I remained on a hunger strike during the 10 days I spent in a forced labor camp. I kept reciting, “Falun Dafa is good!” I also talked with the policemen about the fact that many practitioners had been tortured to death in the detention center. They were planning to detain me there for a year, but the prison doctor said that my physical condition was so weak that I could not stay there, so I was released.
Cultivating myself in the process of saving sentient beings
When I came out of the forced labor camp, I found work as a mall security guard, which gave me a chance to meet and clarify the truth to many people every day. The environment was still complicated, however. The local 610 Office knew that I was working in the mall and the police often came to monitor my activities. Most mall employees knew that I was a Falun Gong practitioner.
At that time, I did not study the Fa well and was too attached to doing things. I developed attachments to competitiveness, comfort and lust, as well as the mentality of showing-off. Whenever I encountered difficulties, I always looked outward. Because the persecution I had experienced in the forced labor camp left a deep impression on me, I was afraid that I would be illegally arrested again. Then, I decided to study the Fa with a calm mind. I studied all of Master's lectures many times and tried to remember the Fa. I went to the Minghui website every day and read the experience sharing articles. I recited “Expounding on the Fa,” “Path,” “Fa-Rectification Period Dafa Disciples,” “The Closer to the End, the More Diligent You Should Be.” I came to understand what cultivation in the Fa-Rectification period should be, what the old forces are, as well as what Dafa practitioners' responsibilities are.
I upgraded my xinxing and gained a deeper understanding of Master's words:
“If you are not afraid, the factor that would make you afraid will cease to exist.” (“Eliminate Your Last Attachment(s),” Essentials for Further Advancement II).
It is our great responsibility to help Master rectify the Fa and offer people salvation. We should take the initiative to assimilate to Dafa's principles, and then all of our attachments will naturally be eliminated in the process of cultivation. The old forces have no excuse to get involved in our cultivation. Anything that interferes with saving sentient beings should be eliminated.
Master talked about the concept that appearance stems from the mind. The people who we interact with and clarify the truth to may end up being the sentient beings in our own world. We really need to be compassionate and save them.
Only if we have a clear understanding of the Fa, can we have righteous thoughts and righteous actions.
Dafa disciples should set the example
Dafa practitioners should act with honesty, kindness and tolerance, which will illustrate to people the goodness of Dafa.
I feel very proud when I tell others that I am a Dafa practitioner. I tell them about the wonders and the beauty of Dafa, and about the physical and mental changes I experienced from practicing Falun Gong. I also let them know about the brutal persecution of Dafa practitioners by the communist regime. I am very enthusiastic and try to do well. After learning the facts about Falun Gong from me, many customers tell me that the truth is completely different from what they had heard on TV and in other CCP-controlled state media. If you conduct yourself well, then people can feel the beauty of Dafa radiating from you.
We have to believe in Master and Dafa in order to save more people. Master is always with me and taking care of me. Master has borne lots of hardships for us. Only by doing the three things well and being more diligent in my cultivation, can I return to my original home with Master.
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