Experiencing Infinite Grace from Ordinary Incidents
(Clearwisdom.net) On the eighteenth anniversary of Master teaching the Fa publicly, as a beneficiary of Falun Gong, I would like to share with you the mental and physical changes in me, and various small incidents since starting to practice Falun Gong. I thank Master for his immense grace. At the same time I want to share my stories with those who cherish life and are searching for the true meaning of life.
I had congenital osteomalacia and was unable to stand up when I was three. My legs and feet were weak and soft, as if they were noodles. Because of that, my grandfather almost buried me alive. My grandfather said that he hadn't seen a person like me throughout the generations of our family. I was considered the family's misfortune. Relatives and neighbors said I would definitely be a burden when I grew up, but my mom refused to get rid of me. My childhood was filled with pain and hunger. My father was labeled a "Rightist" during the Cultural Revolution and his reputation wasn't restored until twenty-two years later. It is easy to imagine how hard my life was when I was young. When I grew up, I eventually married an alcoholic. We divorced when our son was six months old. My career never went smoothly, and my life was really tough.
The insomnia I had for three years ended
One of my students' mothers tried to hand me a copy of the book The Great Consummation Way of Falun Dafa in the fall of 1998, but I did not accept it because I was too attached to Communist Party culture and leaned towards atheism. Two weeks later the same student's mother brought me a copy of Zhuan Falun and told me that she had ordered it especially for me. Moved by her sincerity and feeling obligated to read it since she went to so much effort, I decided to read the book. To my surprise I cried profusely when I first saw Master's image in the book. Feeling strangely encouraged, I read the book attentively. The more I read, the more insights I had. My body felt more comfortable. Without hardly noticing, I read three lectures in one sitting. Suddenly I felt sleepy. I had suffered from severe insomnia for three years and depended on sleeping pills, so it was odd to feel sleepy. I fell asleep with the book's principle, "no loss, no gain" fresh in my mind.
When I got up the next day, I felt so comfortable, as if I had a really long sleep. Then I realized that I had slept for six hours, something unimaginable in the past three years. Before that, seven sleeping pills could only make me sleep for two hours, and I always dreamed during sleep. I never slept that long. It was a blessed event.
What surprised me more and frightened me a bit was getting a shock from everything I touched the next morning--not only metal, but also wood. I eventually understood this to be a manifestation of supernormal abilities. I found this unbelievable. One week later the psoriasis that had bothered me for twenty years was also gone. At that point, I hadn't started to learn the exercises yet, and I had just read the book.
After the communist regime started persecuting Falun Gong, I had several experiences. Having just left home one day, I witnessed a man throwing a Dafa book into a trash can. I picked it up and treated it as a treasure, since I really wanted to read Dafa books but had no money. At home I spent a full day and night listening to all of Master's tapes of his Fa-teaching in Jinan, 14 in all. Then I got a cold. I had a fever for seven days. My eyes were red, my whole body felt chilly, and my joints ached. I did not take medicine, nor was I worried. I knew that Master was helping to purify my body, eliminate my karma and all of the bad things accumulated in my body from my past lifetimes, and dig them out at the roots.
Master said in Zhuan Falun,
"When you feel very uncomfortable, it indicates that things will turn around after reaching the extreme point. Your whole body will be purified and it must be completely purified. The cause of your illness has been removed, and what remains is only this bit of black qi that will come out on its own to let you suffer some and have some pain. It is forbidden for you not to suffer even a little bit."
After seven days of suffering, I was a completely different person and I felt so good since all of my illnesses had disappeared. This was eleven years ago. Since then there has not been any medicine in my home. My son doesn't cultivate, but he believes in Dafa. I have cultivated for eleven years and my son hasn't needed any medicine for the same duration.
This is exactly what Master said in Zhuan Falun, "your practice will benefit others."
Who tore up my fortune-telling books?
Prior to practicing Falun Dafa, having experienced many hardships, I believed in other things. I had learned from The Book of Changes, The Eight Trigrams, and The Principle of Names. I studied fortune patterns. I gave names to others, and people consulted me about their horoscopes. I had some success and was happy for myself. Many relatives and neighbors came to my home to have their fortunes and horoscopes told, and often what I told them would be correct. I also gave names and changed names for others. I got paid to do this; I charged 100 yuan for one name. The student's mom I mentioned at the beginning of my story suggested that I give up those things when she brought me the book. I was offended and told her that I would never give up fortune-telling, even if I had to give up other things, because I earned fast money with it. She replied, "You will give it up gradually; Master has many methods to help you get rid of it." I could not accept what she said. What kind of great person could make me give up something that I had considered a part of me?
When I finished reading Zhuan Falun, a strange thing happened. I remembered that the night before I had put my fortune-telling books on top of the bookshelf. But now several pages were torn. When I asked others about it, no one knew of it. I confronted my sister's 3 1/2-year-olds, but they said that they were too short to reach the shelf, which was quite logical. My sister said, "Your Master asked you to give it up." I wasn't pleased with her response and replaced the book with another. As soon as I put the new book on the table, one of the children cried for egg stew. I brought him a bowl of it, and dropped it right on the new book. Without thinking I smacked the child, angry that his wanting the stew had ruined my book.
Afterwards, I realized that Master indeed wanted me to give it up. Although I believed it, I just could not do it. Later on, whenever I earned money for fortune telling, soon after I would have to use the money to pay for some sudden damages my son had caused, or other things. It would go fast. I realized that everyone had his own fate. Some people suffer a lot, but others don't, all because of karmic retribution. I couldn't ignore this principle and accumulate additional karma just for earning more money. I needed to pay for my own karma, and I realized that Master is taking care of me in everything.
Why can't I play video games?
Master not only purifies our bodies, but also gives us tests along the way as a means for us to improve our xinxing. I've always been stubborn. I would not stop if I did not win at a video game. I often stayed up really late to play. Sometimes I even wanted to break the television to relieve my anger when I didn't do well with a game.
Once, after starting to cultivate, I met a practitioner who managed a store selling video games. I wanted to go there and play. But whenever I played, the game pad malfunctioned or the unit powered off. Nothing would happen if he played. He said, "Master is asking you to stop." I wondered why he could play and I couldn't. After I went back home, I hooked up my game console. But even after adjusting the wires, the television couldn't get a signal. I thought that maybe it was a problem with one of the knobs and tried to adjust it. "Crack," it broke. I bought a new one to try again, but it still didn't work, so I thought the problem was either the power-strip or the connecting cable. I bought the most expensive strip, but it also did not work. I wanted to buy a new cable, but everywhere I went, the stores were sold out.
I called my brother, who worked at the utility company. He said, "Your Master is asking you to stop." My brother suggested that I not play video games again. I did not listen to him. To tell you the truth, I still believed in atheism at that time. Although I agreed with what Master said in the book, I still doubted whether there was such a great sage in this world. Also, I was a new practitioner and could not understand why Master had such strict requirements for me. I couldn't bear it.
My brother soon brought me a new, expensive cable. I took the cable to the practitioner's store and bragged a little in front of him, even singing a little song in front of him. The practitioner said to me as I left, "You might not be so happy later on."
I went upstairs and tried to open the door. I realized that I had locked the key to the apartment inside! And the stove was still on! I returned to the practitioner's store. He came with me with some tools and tried to open the door, but was unsuccessful. I asked my neighbor for a power drill, but someone had borrowed it from him the day before. I was so angry that I kicked the door. We ended up calling the police. The police told us that we needed to find a locksmith, but the local locksmith was not working that day. I was furious at that point.
The practitioner said, "You are so angry. Your eyes are red and your face is pale. Is it worth it? Why is Master asking you to stop? I might play video games for a little fun, yet you do it with such a frenzy. You have such a strong sense of competitiveness. What will happen if you keep playing? Isn't Master helping you? How could you dare not listen to Master? It is right that you are having these troubles!" His words woke me up. I went home and confessed to Master in my heart, "I was wrong and I no longer doubt you. I will never play video games again. Please, open the door for me, Master." At that point, I had believed in atheism for so many years. This was the first time that I had called out for Master.
Then an amazing thing happened. My brother went to the third floor and found a way from the small window in the hallway, kicked open the window on my balcony, and got into my apartment. A few minutes later, he opened the door. My brother asked me to measure the window frame so that we could replace the glass. When I picked up the window pane that was kicked in, I was shocked; it was not damaged at all. I cried and called out silently, "Master! Master!" I immediately wrapped up and put aside the game console. I eventually gave it away.
Incidents like these helped me concentrate on cultivation. I really started believing in the power of Dafa and Master. I knew very well that Master had arranged this incident, not only to help me get rid of competitiveness, but also to let me, a stubborn atheist, experience the existence of higher beings. This helped me remove the obstacles on my way to assimilating to Dafa. I cannot help crying when I recall this event. It was then that I began to understand what Buddha's infinite grace is.
After this I began to study the Fa and do the exercises every day, which made my mind peaceful.
Changing into a new person
I was a stubborn, impatient person prior to cultivation, and had a bad temper. In addition to my illnesses being healed through cultivation, my impatient nature and temper also changed for the better. I still remember the first episode of my being more tolerant because of cultivation. My brother and his hot-tempered boss had a conflict. One day the boss publicly insulted me with dirty language. I said to myself, "Forbearance, forbearance." I really did forbear, but I still felt angry. Once I was home, I got electrically shocked by whatever I touched, even through a cotton padded coat. I realized that I was tolerating reluctantly, and Master was encouraging me to do better.
The next episode concerned profit. My friend's cousin was deceived over some matter, in which I lost 3,000 yuan. She would not pay me back and didn't even apologize. Instead, she was angry with me. I couldn't believe it. My friend and his wife would not stand up for me when talking to the cousin. I was upset and hurt. I verbally attacked them and their families. But then I studied the Fa and improved my xinxing. I gradually got rid of the attachments to personal gain, competitiveness, and jealousy. I was also able to get the money back: six months later I made 6,000 yuan on a real estate transaction. It was exactly as Master said, "If something is yours, you will not lose it."
Master has asked practitioners to think of others in everything they do. My friend's cousin didn't lose the money intentionally. She was also hurt, and I was not angry with her anymore when I realized this.
Master said in Zhuan Falun,
"Shouldn't we have compassion as practitioners? When our compassion emerges, we will probably find all living beings and every person suffering. This will happen."
"You have 15 days to live" doesn't apply to true cultivators
After the persecution by the communist regime began, like countless practitioners, I was also tortured. I was severely abused. I was shackled to rings on the floor for eight days. Eight policemen, including the leader Meng (surname), forcibly inserted a rubber tube into my esophagus. They force-fed me pills and salt, all to try to force me to give up cultivation. I spat up blood and also things such as medicine, flies, and even needles.
After one year of mistreatment in a forced labor camp, I went on a hunger strike to protest the persecution. Ten days later, I was taken to a hospital. The doctor said that I had a malignant tumor, saying that I would only live for another 15 days. I continued the hunger strike and wrote a letter to labor camp officials, encouraging them to do the right thing. I asked them to free me unconditionally. As I had hoped, I was released eight days later. Once at home, my family members suggested that I go to the hospital. I didn't go. I did the exercises every day and soon after, everything was fine. "You have 15 days to live" doesn't apply to true cultivators.
Friends and relatives learn Falun Dafa
My recovery shocked my friends and relatives. My brother's wife used to believe in Buddhism and burned incense and kowtowed 108 times every day. After my return from the labor camp, she decided to give up Buddhism and began to learn Dafa. Before, my brother was too fearful to practice and did not believe in Dafa due to the CCP's lies. He had also ruined Dafa books. Seeing my changes, he began to read Dafa books. Later, he wrote a solemn declaration. He now tells everyone that Falun Dafa is good.
Because of what he had suffered during the Cultural Revolution, my dad was too fearful and was against Dafa. After seeing my recovery from near death, he never again said a bad word about Dafa and also quit the CCP and its affiliated organizations. My mom recites "Falun Dafa is good" every day. Five members of my sister's family also read Zhuan Falun. Although they have not yet begun cultivation, they have positioned themselves well.
Some friends have also begun to cultivate. They have proactively asked their families to quit the CCP and its affiliated organizations. The power of Dafa is quietly helping more and more people.