I was imprisoned in a forced labor camp and have gone through a lot of turnabouts in my cultivation. Therefore, I've been wondering whether I have a loophole for the old forces to take advantage of in dealing with my family members, especially my husband. Recently I have found that I still have a well-hidden attachment of sentimentality.

My husband has threatened me with divorce several times to stop me from practicing Falun Gong; my father also had repeatedly threatened to sever family ties with me. At that time I thought that I needed to firmly insist on practicing cultivation no matter who attempted to stop me. Afterwards, however, I started to wonder why I encountered such a situation that two persons threatened my sentimental relationships, requiring me to make a choice between Dafa and sentimentality.

Master said, "because the Dafa disciples are my disciples, and nobody else is worthy of handling them." ("Teaching the Fa at the Meeting with Asia-Pacific Students", 2004) Master also said, "Humans aren't worthy of testing this Fa, and neither are Gods. Whoever touches it commits a sin." ("Teaching the Fa at the Great Lakes Fa Conference in North America", Guiding the Voyage, 2000) My understanding is that Master does not acknowledge the old forces' use of ordinary people to stop me from practicing cultivation, but do I have some attachment that the old forces are taking advantage of to do this? By looking within, I found that my attitude to marriage is warped, based on selfishness, and that I don't have true compassion towards my family members.

I studied "Fa Teaching Given at the Epoch Times Meeting," and enlightened that the reason I haven't succeeded in clarifying the truth to my husband and my father must be because I don't treat them as I would any other members of society who are being deceived by the evil Party, and that I don't have enough compassion for them. The main difference between them and others is that they are my family members. I ignored the sentimental notions that interfered with me.

In the past, I thought that a family was built after the couple fell in love with each other, and was developed by their love and blood relationship. Now I feel this notion is wrong.

I considered the troubles brought from my relatives as the debt I owed them from past lifetimes, thinking that after I cultivated myself well, I would fully repay the debt and they would treat me well. But this notion is still based on selfishness and wrongly considered whether others treated me well as the goal in my life. Therefore, with this as my starting point, I was still an ordinary person who wished to fulfill or satisfy my sentimental needs through practicing cultivation. This attachment was deeply hidden! Inwardly I had hoped to get praise from family members and was afraid of others' displeasure. Therefore, the old forces took advantage of my attachment, and my family members even used their own standards to measure Dafa. All of this was caused by my notions.

Secondly, I didn't have compassion for my family members. The reason is that I was deeply caught up in sentimentality and as a result couldn't be truly compassionate. My caring for my family members was based on warped notions, not the true compassion that a Dafa practitioner should have. My family members even used the family to fight against my cultivation. This meant that the basic point of my cultivation was based on my notions about family rather than on the Fa. I enlightened that the form of families is just one among many forms in human society. In Christian culture, two people who are going to get married need to go to a church to swear to their God. In our Chinese traditional culture, the couple needs to worship Heaven and Earth to get permission. Following gods' grace and guidance, husband and wife would then know how to treat family members and how to organize family life. For our Dafa practitioners, no matter what kind of ceremony our families performed in the beginning, no matter whether we practiced Falun Dafa or not, our families came for Dafa. We didn't know and realize, but we should know now that the existence of our families must be acknowledged by Master and is out of Master's blessing. I enlightened from Master's lectures that the relationship between family members has been decided by gods rather than ordinary sentimentality. But because people are soaked in sentimentality, this is what they believe.

As a Dafa disciple, clarifying the truth to family members is my responsibility. Whether they treat me well or not is not my goal. However, it does not matter whether they are my father, mother, son or daughter, their relationship with me in this life comes from Dafa and Master's blessing. They don't practice cultivation, therefore they don't understand. But as a cultivator I must clearly understand it. I tell myself that my family members cannot use their positions in the family as a platform to make irresponsible remarks towards Dafa because they don't have this qualification. For instance, my parents can require a lot from me; my husband can ask me to do many things. All of this is within their roles in the family. However, they cannot measure Dafa by using their roles even if they are my parents and my husband. If they do that, it will destroy their qualification to exist in this universe.

I enlightened that I needed to get rid of the root of my sentimentality to family and marriage. Although the society seems to be complicated and running randomly, everything comes for Dafa and exists because of Master's blessing. It doesn't matter whether someone is a president or a poor person, no matter which class he or she comes from, all human beings exist here because of Dafa's blessing. Nobody can't make irresponsible remarks towards Dafa by using their positions or careers; otherwise, they will destroy their own positions and right to exist.

I also realize that true compassion towards family members and sentient beings comes after we fully get rid of the desire to get acceptance from others. Whether a person praises me as good or bad, it should not cause me to have affection or dislike for them. Dafa disciples don't need the praise of others, however, people should think "Falun Dafa is good." This is the only attitude that they need to have. They should be respectful towards the title of Dafa disciples because Dafa disciples can bring them the hope for salvation. As a Dafa disciple, I don't need their praise. Their attitudes are just appearances created to help me look within.

In the past, I didn't understand the sentence "Falun Dafa is good." Now, I'm clear. It is a compassionate blessing from Dafa and Master. I originally wasn't qualified to say that sentence. In the past, the concept of good or bad in my mind was all formed throughout the long history of a cosmos filled with warped notions. Because my understanding was based on the old cosmos, I was not qualified to say anything about Dafa. It is Master's compassion that allows me to say "Falun Dafa is good" and allows me to praise Master and Dafa. This is a blessing beyond words; this is the most pure language that Master bestows upon us. Before I enlightened to this, I must have considered "good" to be the warped definition developed throughout the cosmos' long history. The warped notion of "good" comes from selfish sentimentality in the human world. From the perspective of the cosmos' history, although I could not see how this notion was first generated in history, I see the crimes caused by this notion. Manifested in this dimension, it is the extremely arrogant and incomparably evil Communist Party. It denies gods' benevolent endowment and places sentient beings under most miserable situations. The presently existing notions of good and bad are a wretched, warped product of the old cosmos. But I had considered it as the root of my life, and it was my very first attachment throughout the long history of the cosmos and therefore became the biggest attachment in my cultivation.

Master and Dafa don't need my praise; Master and Dafa lack nothing. However, the only thing I need to do is to receive the grace and the endowment, sincerely recite "Falun Dafa is good" and then I can be qualified to become a life in the new universe. Besides praising Master and Dafa, I don't need to say anything else. Praising Master and Dafa is the attitude that a sentient being should have.

If the evil communist spirits didn't use warped notions to poison sentient beings, sentient beings would have unconditionally accepted Dafa. Because I was attached to sentimentality and indulged the evil communist spirits to commit crimes, I need to clear them away with my righteous thoughts and clarify the truth to those who have been deceived. This is my responsibility as a Dafa disciple.

My understanding towards barriers is as follows: The warped notion prevents us from seeing where every part of us came from and causes us to stubbornly consider our attachment to sentimentality as the origin of our life. The old forces took advantage of this and put my human body in the forced labor camp with the excuse that part of my life belongs to them. I think the barriers came from my notions generated through numerous lifetimes. Because I was attached to these notions, the old forces had the right to control me. When I sent forth righteous thoughts for fellow practitioners who were locked in forced labor camps, prisons and secret hospitals, I felt my righteous thoughts were not powerful enough and I could not break through these barriers. Now I understand and have enlightened that it is caused by my attachment to sentimentality.

From now on, all my bodies will not allow the existence of the old forces, and will not allow the old forces to separate fellow practitioners' bodies. We must get rid of our attachments and eliminate the hiding places of the old forces, then the old forces will be completely destroyed.