Truly Letting Go of Life and Death and Witnessing the Miracle of Dafa
(Clearwisdom.net) I began practicing Falun Gong in the summer of 1998. However, I did not truly cultivate myself and did not let go of life and death; as a result, my sickness karma kept coming back.
On February 16, 2009, I could not stand it anymore, so I went to a hospital. After examinations I was diagnosed with final-stage gastric cancer. I also had adenal carcinoma, esophagus cancer and lymphoma. The doctor told my family that it was too late to for surgery or chemotherapy.
My family kept my real situation from me. I continued my Fa study and exercises, but I was thinking in my heart, I could not truly let go of life. I also thought, I had not pass this test, but I would continue to cultivate myself once I recovered from my sickness.
However, my sickness became worse each day until I could not eat or drink for fours days. I began thinking I should go to the hospital again. My family then told me my real situation. After hearing that, I completely eliminated my attachment of going to the hospital. I decided from that moment on to give all I have to Teacher and Dafa.
Once I had this righteous thought, a miracle happened. I had the strength to speak, and I could eat and drink. I had a new feeling in my heart, which I could not describe in words. Over the years, although I had been 'cultivating', I knew then that I had not been truly cultivating. When I knew the truth of the illness, I realized that my time was limited.
At that time, even having gone without food or drink for four days and feeling exhausted, I still insisted on doing the five sets of exercises. During this early recovery period, my legs were swollen with one being worse than the other; nevertheless, I could still walk for a long distance. What was more wonderful--within a few days, my swollen feet and legs actually returned to normal size. My relatives all said that this was a miracle.
Now not only have my cancers been arrested, my life has been extended. Is this not a Dafa's miracle? If I did not have Teacher, or had not obtained the Fa, my life would have ended already. My new life is given by Teacher and Dafa; therefore, I must treasure this time. I will cultivate more diligently, truly cultivate myself as a genuine practitioner and do the three things well.
Through my test of life and death I have developed a deeper understanding of Teacher's words:
"If you can let go of life and death, you're a God; if you can't let go of life and death, you're a human." ("Teaching the Fa in New York City" from Lectures in the United States)