Our Children's Behaviors Reflect Our Own Inadequacies
(Clearwisdom.net) According to my understanding of the Fa, most children who are born into Falun Dafa practitioner families have come from higher dimensions and are here to learn the practice. Therefore, I first thought that these young practitioners should be very well-behaved, but in reality their behavior is similar to that of ordinary children.
My son is almost 7 and was born in a family of Falun Gong practitioners. He is quite well behaved, but he also has his own character flaws. For example, he is a picky eater, he is not diligent in studying, and once he has learned a bit he likes to show off. He does not like to study the Fa lecture by lecture, but rather likes to skip between chapters while reading. He is also rather stubborn, in that the more he is told not to do something the more he will do it. I have talked to him about these things many times, but he does not seem to change his behavior much. I have at times become very angry with him and given him a few slaps on the butt. He then improves, but for only a few days. One day, I compared his behavior to that of the adults around him (my parents, my wife and myself). I then realized that what appeared to be a young practitioner's shortcomings were actually the very same as those of adults. This made me think that we were purposely shown our child's behavior to help us look within to find our own shortcomings.
When I was young I was also a very picky eater. A year before I began to practice Falun Gong, I found that I could not eat meat or anything with a strong odor, including green onions, ginger and garlic. I know this should have been a good thing, but it later developed into an attachment. I would purposely look for and pick out any trace of green onion in food dishes. My son is now like that too. Other than the three main meals a day, I don't eat any snacks. I seldom feel thirsty and often go for long periods without drinking. I also see these forms of behavior in my son. When I realized the influence I had over my son, I quickly adjusted my behavior. I now don't pick at things when I eat, and intentionally drink more water at home and work. After a while, my son also started asking for a drink of water at home and at school.
As a youngster I thought I was quite clever, and used to show off. I knew it was not good to show off, so I would disguise this behavior and not let other people know I was showing off. I remember that my father also had this same mentality. If there was a situation where everyone was in agreement on a particular thing, my father would deliberately propose a differing point of view, so as to attract attention or to make us laugh. His intention was to attract attention and please the crowd. I have now noticed that my child has the same characteristics.
With regard to our young practitioners, it is the parents' responsibility to bring them up well. If our children's behavior is unsatisfactory, then as practitioners we should first look within ourselves to find our own inadequacies or attachments. After we correct our own behavior, our children's problems will very likely be solved as well.
The above references are from my personal understandings. Fellow practitioners, please point out anything that is inappropriate.