Eliminating Attachments Including Arguing Over Who Is Right or Wrong

(Minghui.org) I realized I had an attachment to trying to determine who was right and who was wrong—this led to arguments, complaints, and jealousy.

I planned to go to a practitioner’s home, but my husband who also practices Falun Dafa, tried to stop me. Because he was afraid I’d be persecuted by the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) again, he did not allow me to coordinate with other practitioners to do the three things. I felt he wanted to control me.

I was indignant and angry and I loudly scolded him for interfering and stopping me from doing what I was supposed to do. When I recalled his recent behavior I felt he tried to arrange my cultivation from the standpoint of a regular person. I couldn’t control myself and I impatiently said, “I have Master to take care of my cultivation. I’ll go to see any practitioner I wish to see. It’s none of your business.”

My husband stood in front of Master’s picture, pressed his hands together in front of his chest, and said, “Master, I’ll wake her up.” He turned around and slapped my face. Then he hit my shoulder.

I felt wronged, and thought, “Master, I’m doing the right thing, but he’s interfering with me. I’m right and he’s wrong. Why did he hit me?”

I lit incense in front of Master’s picture. When I looked up, Master was smiling at me. I no longer felt trapped in the feeling of being wronged and knew I must have attachments to let go.

Admitting My Mistakes

Even though I understood I was wrong, my husband continued to scold, berate, and mock me. I couldn’t stand it, and I couldn’t maintain my xinxing. I called my daughter, and before I could even say a bad word about my husband, I choked up. My daughter guessed that her dad hurt me, so she texted him. My husband then apologized to me. I thought I exposed whatever was controlling him so I felt I gained the upper hand. But after I won the argument I began having a tribulation and I endured six months of torment.

Numerous tiny blisters the size of rice grains appeared on my right fingers and palm. They were itchy and when I squeezed them they oozed pus. When I looked inward, and realized that even though I was right, I had many human emotions: Anger is resentment, arguing loudly is being competitive, not letting others talk or interfere, and wanting to go wherever I wanted. I also disregarded others’ feelings and I had a willful attitude. I wanted my daughter to get revenge for me. Thus, I was taken advantage of by the old forces.

So why did I get impetigo? I realized that the small lesions might be caused by the old forces, which controlled my bad thoughts and used this to persecute me. When I deeply looked inward I realized I had a stubborn, unyielding nature—When I wished to prove I was right, I dropped to a regular person’s level. Was I displaying the Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance that a practitioner should have? I apologized to Master and my husband. I also tried to eliminate my jealousy and competitiveness. These rotten things which manifested in this dimension as bacteria and insects came from the old forces and were harming me. It worked. The impetigo symptoms lessened.

In a dream I saw a medium-sized frog, and some of its skin peeled off. I sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate my jealousy, which helped eliminate the frog in that dimension. Afterwards, the yellow blisters on my hands gradually disappeared, and they stopped itching and hurting.

Rectifying Myself

Unfortunately, I began to argue with my husband over something, and this caused me to have additional illness symptoms. My hands suddenly split open with small cuts, each 0.2 inch long, and the pain made me afraid to use my hands.

I understood that my stubborn, unyielding mentality caused this. It made me feel I was right, so I had to do things my way. I ignored other peoples’ feelings—which was a manifestation of selfishness. Master taught us in the Fa that we shouldn’t be attached to our egos—we should be altruistic. But, I went the opposite way. In addition, Master asks practitioners to emphasize compassion, and that we should treat others kindly. I should also consider my husband’s situation.

Looking inward, I realized that my mindset as a teacher was at play: I lectured my students. I placed myself above others and I constantly judged who was right and wrong. When I ran into conflicts I always tried to get to the bottom of who was right or wrong. Thus, this competitive mentality has bred for a long time, so that I was stuck at a level for a long time. When it came to saving sentient beings, my righteous thoughts were not strong enough, so I missed people who had predestined relationships with me to clarify the facts to them. I felt bad when I realized this.

After painful reflection, my husband and I listened to the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party and Dismantling the Party’s Culture on the Minghui website, we found this beneficial and we were able to eliminate much of our CCP mindset.

My daughter called and said, “Mom, I dreamed there were several big spiders with smiling human faces in my apartment and under the bed. They led a whole nest of little spiders out. There was also a large scorpion in the bathroom that led a nest of scorpions out. You, Dad, and I chased them down and killed them all. There was a centipede more than a foot long on my pillow. You used a pole to pick it up and throw it out the window. Only one scorpion hid.”

I said, “Don’t be scared. Your Mom and Dad didn’t eliminate our competitive mentality and jealousy all these years, so many poisonous creatures were nurtured in another dimension. Now, because we have awakened and are dismantling attachments to competitiveness, resentment, and jealousy, our dimensional field have become clear, and poisonous creatures were destroyed, which was what you saw in your dream. This is a good thing. Our family’s dimensional field is clean.”

I sent forth righteous thoughts and eliminated my attachments. I also asked for Master’s empowerment to clean up my daughter’s and our dimensional fields.

My husband said, “Several years ago, I dreamt of a black snake. It seemed to be opening its mouth, trying to incite us to fight and argue. Another time, after we had a fight, I angrily went for a walk and saw a small black snake by the road. We can’t fight anymore. I realized that these things might be causing trouble, making us fight among ourselves, to persecute us.”

All these years, the old forces were controlling these things to make trouble for us, stirring up trouble between my husband and me, fuelling our jealousy, and causing us to fight.

My husband said, “I have no confidence in your cultivation. Sometimes you aren’t even as good as an everyday person. I felt great discomfort in your energy field. You even went as far as interfering with my cultivation. Thus, I didn’t want to cultivate diligently.”

I also had my own opinions about my husband and looked down on him. My lack of humility and arrogance made him even more resentful of me, so he constantly criticized me, even resorting to insults. Whenever I tried to explain or defend myself, he would turn pale with anger and explode at the slightest provocation. I felt frustrated by his insults and constant accusations. Several times, I was so disappointed in my own behaviour that I wept. It really wore down my confidence in cultivation. I also heard that a family of five were all practitioners. But each of them looked outward to cultivate others. They all refused to look inward, which negatively impacted their cultivation.

Those creatures in the other dimension were manifestations of the CCP’s poisonous factors in other dimensions. If we didn’t send enough righteous thoughts, with our attachments and Party culture, we were breeding them.

I strengthened my efforts to send righteous thoughts and focused on eliminating the rotten substances such as insects and bacteria as well as every evil factor that controlled them. My hands were no longer cracked, new fingernails grew on my right hand, and my hands were completely healed.

My husband and I have made fundamental breakthroughs in our cultivation, and we feel we are forging ahead. My husband, who only started cultivating two years ago, looks much younger. Although he’s in his 50s, practitioners say he looks like he’s in his 30s.

The gaps between my husband and me disappeared. We could look at each other in a positive way and we look inward when we have conflicts. Our competitive mentality, jealousy, and resentment are becoming weaker and weaker.

The above is what I’d like to share with fellow practitioners, to remind each other and walk well together on the final leg of the journey arranged by Master and we need to maintain righteous thoughts.