Getting Rid of the Attachment to Defending Myself

(Minghui.org) During the 2020 pandemic, people were not allowed to go out casually. At that time, I was living in a small house, just 33 square meters (355 square feet). I had no TV or mobile phone. Besides eating simple meals and sleeping, I studied the Fa, did the exercises, and sent forth righteous thoughts every day. Sometimes, I studied four lectures of Zhuan Falun, the main text of Falun Dafa, as well Master’s other lectures, and listened to the recording of Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party.

However, I found that some strong thought karma could not be removed, no matter how hard I tried. This thought karma was formed by the competitive mentality developed under the influence of the Chinese Communist Party’s (CCP) indoctrination.

I had previously discovered this thought karma when studying the Fa and sharing my experiences with fellow practitioners, and, despite trying to get rid of it, it appeared again whenever I was doing the Falun Standing Stance.

Sometimes, my thoughts followed the thought karma, which seriously interfered with my studying the Fa and doing the exercises. This thought karma was becoming an obstacle in my cultivation, so I wanted to overcome it. But how? I realized that I should change the way I studied the Fa.

Master said,

“The Fa can break all attachments, the Fa can destroy all evil, the Fa can shatter all lies, and the Fa can strengthen righteous thoughts.” (“Drive Out Interference,” Essentials for Further Advancement II)

One day, I ran into a practitioner I had not seen for many years. We discussed our cultivation states. After hearing about my problem, she suggested, “The best way to break through this difficulty is to recite the Fa. I am doing that now. It is very effective.” Her suggestion matched my thinking, and I was determined to recite the Fa.

Reciting the Fa Helps Me Eliminate Thought Karma

I had started to try to memorize the Fa before, but I didn’t stick with it. Thinking about it now, I became fearful. My fellow practitioner encouraged me to memorize sentence by sentence first, then connect the sentences together and memorize the large paragraphs separately.

I did it this way for a while and felt it worked well. In the past when I studied the Fa, my mind could not absorb it, but this time I realized that, in order to memorize the Fa, I had to absorb it first. As I continued to do this, I experienced big changes.

Unbelievably, one day when I was doing the exercises, I found that the disturbing scene generated by the thought karma was gone, and I could calm down when I was doing the exercises. I was grateful to Master and grateful for the extraordinary power of Dafa. In the past, I could not remove the thought karma no matter how hard I tried; now, without even realizing it, was gone.

This experience strengthened my confidence and determination to continue reciting the Fa, which brought great changes in my xinxing.

Memorizing the Fa Helps Me Get Rid of the Attachment to Defending Myself

My husband has always been very nice to me, and I have the final say on everything in the family. I started to practice Dafa because I had a tumor on my pituitary gland. Seeing something so serious be cured, my husband believed in Dafa and has always supported my cultivation.

Even when the persecution was at its height, he never stopped me from clarifying the truth about Falun Dafa and distributing truth-clarification materials with fellow practitioners. One time, I came home very late, and he was so anxious that he had been walking in circles, but he never complained. He has endured a lot over these years.

But as I was happily preparing the Chinese New Year dinner, my husband suddenly said something about my deceased relatives that hurt me. I was shocked, thinking, “Why did he say that?” I have a hot temper and would usually get angry right away. This time, I didn’t respond right away, and Master’s words came to mind:

“Of course, it’s fine to try to explain things with good intent; there’s nothing wrong with trying to clear things up. But if you do it with too much attachment it won’t work out.” (The Fourth Talk, Zhuan Falun)

I wanted to explain, but then I thought about why I felt like I needed to explain. What for? Was this still arguing over ordinary people’s ideas and wanting to defend myself? I said nothing and continued cooking as if nothing had happened. Afterwards, I felt that my resolve to not argue with my husband was unbelievable. How had I been able to change so much?

It was definitely the power of memorizing the Fa.

There will always be conflicts in life, and my husband creates opportunities for me to improve from time to time. Now, whenever bad substances or emotions come up, I put down what I am doing and study the Fa right away. Usually, I read a paragraph of the Fa three or four times. It is the power of the Fa that solves the problem and the issue behind the problem.

My husband and I had another conflict in which I felt the power of sincere Fa study. At the time, instead of getting angry at him, I had compassion in my heart. I felt that everyone in the world was suffering. I could no longer argue about what was right and wrong among ordinary people. I had to cultivate myself well. My words and deeds are part of the truth of Dafa, and I must do well according to the standards of the Fa.

Postscript

This is the first time I’ve ever written down my experiences. When I decided to write it, the old forces interrupted me halfway through the article. I suddenly felt sleepy and weak. I understood this was interference and that the evil feared being eliminated. I couldn’t be led astray, so with the help of fellow practitioners, I finished it. I still have a lot to improve on, and there is still a gap between me and the standards of the Fa. From now on, I will study the Fa earnestly, memorize the Fa, act by the standards of the Fa, and fulfill my vows.