(Minghui.org) I started practicing Falun Dafa in 1997. I cooperate with other practitioners to make truth-clarification materials and also do some technical work. I’d like to talk about how I recently improved my xinxing.
In December 2022, the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) suddenly dropped its tight pandemic restrictions, and the COVID virus spread rapidly. Untold numbers of people across China tested positive. I also had a fever and runny nose. I didn’t think about it much at first, but two days later, I developed a sore throat. I always felt I had phlegm but couldn’t cough it out. When I went to bed, I had trouble breathing and I could only sleep for an hour or two.
I couldn’t eat and had no strength. The joints of my legs were swollen and painful, and I couldn’t stand up from a squatting position. When I sat in the full-lotus position, the pain in my legs was excruciating. In addition, my mother, uncle, and older sister all got COVID and passed away. I felt a bit scared. I went to the pharmacy to buy some Chinese herbal medicines and started taking them. It seemed I forgot I was a Falun Dafa practitioner.
A young practitioner who provided technical support passed away during that period. Another IT support practitioner named Cao also developed illness symptoms. He had blurred vision, loss of appetite, heart pain, and tremors. Cao’s daughter drove him to my home and asked me to help him send forth righteous thoughts. This increased the pressure on me, and my fear mentality surfaced.
Another reason I was nervous was I lived by myself when I first developed illness symptoms. My wife passed away six years prior, and my only daughter lived in another city. When I wanted a drink of water, no one was there to help, and when I had something to say, no one was there to listen.
My righteous thoughts were very weak, and I forgot that Master was looking after me. Fortunately, I clearly remembered that practitioners who were experiencing illness tribulations needed others to study the Fa and send forth righteous thoughts with them. But Cao did not know about my situation. I was still secretly taking medicine, and it seemed I completely forgot I was a cultivator.
Learning to Look Inward
Cao asked me to go to his home to study the Fa with him. This was actually Master enlightening me and telling me to improve based on the Fa. I was able to endure the discomfort and mental torment I experienced after taking the medicine and went to study the Fa with him. I persisted, every day, until New Year’s Eve.
After the New Year, I studied the Fa with Cao in the morning, and joined a group of four other practitioners to study in the evening. Before each session, we sent righteous thoughts. We all constantly looked inward. I realized that even though I practiced Dafa for more than 20 years, I still bought live seafood for myself and my relatives. As a result, I often had pain and itches here and there.
The karmic debts we incur must be repaid. Master has repaid a lot for us disciples, but I did not realize it. I did not really improve and stumbled during the pandemic.
Master told us,
“True Dafa disciples have higher energy and are able to destroy karma and germs; they are emissaries of salvation in these latter days, and bring their wisdom to bear upon saving people as they share truthful information related to our practice.” (“Stay Rational”)
After studying the Fa and sending forth righteous thoughts for a period of time, my xinxing improved to some extent. I understood the main reason for my fall was because I did not completely believe in Master and the Fa. I warned myself that I must firmly believe in Master, maintain my xinxing, and walk out of my human notions. I threw away all the medicine, and the false appearance of illness disappeared.
One night, my right arm suddenly hurt a lot. I sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate the interference. But my arm was still in pain, and I couldn’t sleep. I knelt in front of Master’s photo and said that my arm hurt too much.
I thought that since I couldn’t sleep, I might as well study the Fa. As I read Zhuan Falun, my mind suddenly became clear. I knew where my problem was: I didn’t regard myself as a cultivator! When my arm started to hurt, my first thought was that I was sick. I patted it with my hands, scratched it, and poured hot water on it. I even thought about traditional Chinese cupping. All this reflected an ordinary person’s thinking. Through studying the Fa, I let go of my worries, and only then did I feel that my arm didn’t hurt anymore. Everything was back to normal!
Looking back, I realized these tribulations occurred because I did not fully believe in Master and the Fa. Master removed the names of true Dafa disciples from the ledger of hell and has pushed us to our rightful positions. But whenever I felt uncomfortable or encountered some tribulations, I forgot I was a cultivator. When I couldn’t firmly believe in Master and the Fa and couldn’t do things according to His requirements, He couldn’t help me. Our every word, action, and thought must be in accordance with the Fa. To be able to do this, studying the Fa well is crucial.
As Dafa disciples of the Fa-rectification period, we must study the Fa well, and constantly assimilate to the Fa. Only in this way can we have sufficient righteous thoughts, save more people, and complete the mission entrusted to us. We are beings created by Dafa, and we co-exist with Dafa. Ordinary people’s illnesses really have nothing to do with us.
Cao and I have been studying the Fa together for more than eight months. During this process, we also shared, looked inward, and sent righteous thoughts together. My xinxing improved, and my previous incorrect state of feeling sleepy when I studied the Fa and sent righteous thoughts greatly improved. My knees also no longer hurt. I will continue to work hard to reach a higher standard.
Cao also found his own shortcomings. He strengthened his righteous thoughts, his state improved, and his thought karma was eliminated. He also threw away the bag of medicine his daughter bought him.
We continued our responsibilities of printing truth-clarification materials, purchasing supplies, repairing printing equipment, and installing computer encryption systems for fellow practitioners. Although two local IT support practitioners left, the equipment maintenance in our area was not affected, and more practitioners are able to visit the Minghui website.
Letting Go of Self-Interest and Considering Others First
I’m very fortunate to be able to make Dafa books for fellow practitioners and, at the same time, I help them purchase and repair printers. I also buy second-hand computers and notebooks for fellow practitioners. Repairing them can be time-consuming and very laborious. I also purchase and keep an inventory of small parts and give these to practitioners for free.
I’ve been doing this for over a decade, but I’ve never kept a record of how much I spent. However, when I use the money donated by other practitioners, I always carefully record every yuan. Over time, I’ve been thanked and praised by fellow practitioners. But I remind myself not to be have zealotry, as I know I can only do these things because of the wisdom Master has given me. as well as the help from practitioners on Minghui and the Tiandixing Forum. Otherwise, how could I, someone who has only completed elementary school, repair printers and computers?
Sometimes unsatisfactory things happened. For example, after I helped practitioners buy parts to repair their machines, they didn’t mention the money for the parts I bought. Some even claimed that the money was donated to me. When this happened, I just laughed it off. I always take these comments as good things.
A senior fellow practitioner once had a blue screen on his computer and asked me to repair it. I told him that the motherboard and SSD were broken, and it wasn’t worth repairing. He couldn’t accept it and said that he bought the best computer from the merchant. In fact, he didn’t realize he’d been cheated.
Since that computer could not be repaired, I replaced the SSD and memory stick on his old laptop. When I took the laptop back to him, he then asked me to repair a newer laptop. The newer laptop had similar issues, so I restored the old laptop to its original state, and used those parts on the newer laptop. I also added another memory stick that cost 140 yuan. After he paid me, he said some inappropriate things to other practitioners. I was unmoved, however, thinking that maybe I didn’t explain the matter clearly to him.
Another practitioner told me about his comments, and I explained what happened. I also asked her to apologize to the elderly practitioner on my behalf. Whenever I encounter a problem, I regard it as a test, so I can usually deal with it calmly.
Practitioners are all helping Master save people. I never refuse when I’m able to help out. I help practitioners purchase spare parts, computers, and printers, and then help with repairs. This is good for fellow practitioners who don’t know how to shop for these items, as it reduces their stress and saves them money. As long as it’s beneficial for Dafa and fellow practitioners, I willingly do it.
When I was experiencing my tribulation, many practitioners invited me to join their Fa study groups. But I chose to study the Fa at Cao’s home. Although it seemed I was helping Cao send righteous thoughts, it was actually Master pulling me up and fellow practitioners helping me! Studying the Fa made me open-minded, and studying the Fa helped me get rid my attachments to fame, gain, and sentimentality. I walked out of my human notions, let go of life and death, and now walk towards the divine.
The above is part of my cultivation experience in the past year. If there is anything not in accordance with the Fa, please kindly point it out.
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