Eliminating the Attachment of Feeling Lonely

(Minghui.org) I am a mother of four daughters, and my second pregnancy resulted in triplets. On most holidays and festivals, my daughters, sons-in-law, grandchildren, and more than a dozen people would gather at my home. We would play and laugh, and everyone enjoyed themselves. I cooked their favorite dishes, and we had a great time together as a family. Once they returned to their respective homes however, my home instantly became very quiet, and my heart would feel empty and lonely.

Thinking back to the days when I took care of everyone during their postpartum period, helping each of them with their newborns, they would take their children out to play, and I would often hesitate to go out, wanting to stay home to study the Fa, but I couldn’t. I had to go with them and look after their children.

Now that my grandchildren have grown up and started going to school, my children no longer take me with them when they go out to have fun. When I expressed my desire to join them, no one agrees to take me along. It’s like all the efforts and sacrifices I made over the years are being overlooked, and I sometimes felt deeply upset.

Various negative emotions such as feelings of unfairness, dissatisfaction, complaints, and resentment kept surfacing in my mind, and I often cried, feeling sadness. But I then remind myself, “Isn’t this really just sentimentality?”

Master said:

“...as to the many attachments that come from qing, we should take them lightly and eventually abandon them.” (Lecture Six in Zhuan Falun)

Children getting together and having fun during the holidays or festivals, or going out and relaxing, is normal. When I looked inward, the desire for excitement, fear of loneliness, and feelings of envy, jealousy, and resentment arose again. When these things showed up, I sent righteous thoughts to eliminate them. Then my mind would become balanced, and I would feel happy for my children. I know I should focus my time on doing the three things, studying the Fa more, and saving more people. This is what I should do!

On the path of validating the Fa and saving sentient beings, loneliness would often arise. Before the pandemic, I used to clarify the truth and distribute the truth materials with another practitioner. But she stopped going out during the pandemic.

In recent years, when distributing the truth materials at night, I went out alone, mainly inserting the materials into the door handles of cars in industrial areas. I sent righteous thoughts before going out. I usually took dozens of fliers with me, and it would take about an hour to distribute them.

Once, on the way home, as I looked at the night sky and the constant flow of vehicles and people, feelings of loneliness again arose. I felt that it would be so much better if there were other practitioners to come along with me! Being alone can make one feel lonely. But I then realized that with Master and the Fa I am not alone. Once realizing this, my loneliness disappeared.

When I returned home, I couldn’t help but feel infinite respect and gratitude. I heshied in reverence, looking up at the sky, grateful for Master’s care, and grateful for Dafa’s salvation.