Cherishing Traditional Values Regarding Marriage

(Minghui.org) Due to various reasons, many people today are single. In my village alone, there are about 50 or 60 middle-aged and elderly single women. Many of them found someone to live with in an unofficial arrangement—no “paperwork.” Their family members and neighbors go along with this inappropriate lifestyle.

Society’s moral norms have degenerated, and many things are in chaos. As Falun Dafa practitioners who follow the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion- Forbearance, we know living this way is improper and sets a dangerous precedent for humankind. But some practitioners, including elderly ones, do not have a clear understanding of this. They do not realize this behavior is inconsistent with Dafa’s teachings and some even encourage others to do it—which is why I am bringing up this issue as a reminder.

Couples living together without getting married has now become a norm. After losing a spouse, many elderly and even middle-aged people find someone to live with but don’t make it official. Since it’s an unofficial arrangement, some change partners from time to time, and some even do this as a way to make money. Everyday people have their ways of doing things. But some practitioners are enthusiastic about this and even encourage single practitioners to live together. Is this something we should be doing? Thinking further, there could be human notions and attachments involved.

When they were young, people who are in their 90s today had traditional understandings of marriage. For example, my grandmother, my grandfather’s mother, and my husband’s grandmother were all widowed at a young age, but they never thought about getting remarried despite the difficulty of raising children alone. People believed in chastity and they always praised a woman for not having more than one husband in her lifetime. After the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) seized power, the regime criticized this idea and encouraged sexual freedom, which eventually led to the chaos we see today.

There are many such stories in traditional Chinese culture: Women who were chaste became divine after death; those who told others to remarry were punished in hell. People today may not believe in these values anymore, but we Dafa practitioners should do well ourselves and avoid meddling in such issues. Master said, “A cultivator does not need to mind the affairs of the human world.” (“Cultivation Practice is Not Political,” Essentials for Further Advancement)

We need to learn from these lessons since practitioners who behave inappropriately might face serious consequences. Encouraging a man and woman to live together without being married can be very dangerous. After all, we practitioners need to leave behind pure and righteous words as well as actions that can serve as a reference for the future. There are many articles on Minghui that touch on this topic, such as “Traditional Chinese Culture: Etiquette Between a Man and a Woman.”

Some practitioners have other, related attachments. One practitioner said, “If my son doesn’t get married, I won’t close my eyes even in death.” This practitioner also encouraged other single practitioners to live together, thinking she was helping them. We should not do such things.

These are my understandings. Please point out anything inconsistent with the Falun Dafa teachings.