(Minghui.org) I would like to tell you about my cultivation experiences while working on the RTC Phone Platform.
Master published five articles between January and September 2023. The articles addressed the essence of cultivation practice. Many practitioners realize that Fa rectification has begun, and they’ve become aware of their shortcomings.
To better understand Master’s teachings, I memorized the five articles. In the process I felt Master was removing bad substances from me, and I realized that only by studying the Fa well and assimilating to the characteristics of Truthfulness, Compassion and Forbearance can I change my conventional ways of thinking and rectify myself.
Prior to this I knew that, as a cultivator, I should take fame, wealth, and sentiment lightly. However, I was similar to the young person Master described in Zhuan Falun who “...will think that he still has a long way to go in life, and he still wants to make every effort to achieve some goals of everyday people.” (Lecture Three, Zhuan Falun)
I often had trouble balancing my aspirations and maintaining the state of being “free of intention” of a cultivator. The article “How Humankind Came To Be” helped me understand the bigger picture of Master’s Fa rectification, and how I should behave in the human world.
Memorizing the Fa helped me gain new understandings of the Fa principles that I didn’t understand before, but cultivating towards consummation is not easy. If we don’t actually cultivate ourselves, we won’t be able to meet Dafa’s standards, and our words and behavior are not that of a practitioner’s. Because I did not truly cultivate myself while I worked on truth-clarification projects, I had various conflicts with other practitioners.
Yan said she saw in me characteristics of the young generation that grew up under the rule of the Chinese Communist Party (CCP). They were pampered by their parents, pushed to achieve academically, accustomed to doing only what pleased them, and had no consideration for others.
Yan’s words sounded harsh, but they pointed out my problems.
Multiple Attempts to Quit
Given the limited resources, it’s difficult to operate Falun Dafa related projects like those of a regular company, let alone the fact that each practitioner has different needs, capabilities, and states of cultivation. I found these limitations extremely challenging when compared to my regular job.
I tend to measure others based my own understanding and the things I’ve achieved. If someone didn’t meet my expectations or did not produce what I deemed high quality work, I became impatient and lashed out at them. Needless to say, over time, other practitioners could no longer tolerate my attitude.
As the conflicts intensified, I asked to quit the Chinese writing team several times, and I asked to transfer to other projects such as the English writing team or media. I felt these areas were more suitable when it came to my talents.
I left a message for Yan asking to quit the Chinese writing team a second time. She sent me a paragraph from “Teachings at the 2005 Conference in San Francisco”, in which Master said,
“Some students forget that they are cultivators and become unhappy as soon as they run into anything troublesome. Some students become unhappy whenever they encounter conflicts or emotional turmoil. In that case, are you still cultivating? Cultivators look at things in just the opposite way. They see tribulations and suffering as good opportunities for improvement. [To cultivators] these are all good things, and the more there are and the faster they come, the faster the improvement.” (“Teachings at the 2005 Conference in San Francisco”)
I finally saw my problem. Master told us years ago that cultivators were to look at things in the opposite way, but I was holding on to everyday people’s reasoning and did not change my conventional ways of thinking. I even shouted and screamed at other practitioners.
After the conflicts eased, I gradually understood that practicing cultivation means suffering hardships and increasing one’s endurance. I understood it was unimportant which project I was in; the key was to cultivate myself in the process.
I read the story of Milarepa repeatedly building a house, which I found inspiring. Milarepa’s master told him to build a house, take it down, and build it again. The purpose was, obviously, not for Milarepa to sharpen his skills in designing and building a good house. I understood that building the house was just a formality, but the key was for Milarepa to understand his master’s arrangements: To tone down his will, cultivate diligently, and eliminate his karma in the process.
I felt the story was similar to our efforts in either our everyday jobs or Dafa projects. If one has been doing something for a long time and has done a lot, it means nothing. Everything we go through is for the process of one’s cultivation.
We are cultivators. Our bodies are still here in the secular world, but our minds have gone beyond. Given this, why should I care about which projects I’m in? Master has his reasons for my joining the writing team. Perhaps it’s the vow I made to help other practitioners at this critical, historical moment.
The RTC Platform is in the first line of saving Chinese people, and all the practitioners involved are part of a one-body. One person saved is the result of the group’s efforts.
Removing Jealousy and Acquired Notions
As I continuously memorized the Fa, exchange understandings with others on the team, and collaborated in editing articles, I was able to appreciate the subtlety and magnificence of cultivation.
However, I was distressed by the fact that I could not become selfless. As soon as I put down the Dafa books, I behaved just as an everyday person would—I was unable to communicate with others calmly when facing problems. Yan pointed out that I had a big attachment to jealousy. At first, I did not take it seriously because I thought jealousy usually surfaced when others were superior. I was the lead writer on the team, so there there was no one for me to be jealous of.
I later read some Minghui articles regarding jealousy and realized that looking down on others is also jealousy, because one thinks others should do better. It manifests when one constantly points out others’ shortcomings. On the surface, it looks like we hope that others can improve, but, subconsciously, one wants to change others so they align with one’s own notions. The root cause is “selfishness.”
I also realized that when practitioners didn’t cooperate well, most of the time it’s because we feel our ideas are better. The attachment to showing off and competition can aggravate jealousy, because jealousy is all about selfishness and ego.
We know that everything has life and so is jealousy. If I don’t remove it, it will keep interfering with me, so I told myself, “This jealousy is not me, and I don’t want it.” But when I became busy I forgot and I didn’t interact calmly with other practitioners—thinking their skills were not good or they didn’t cultivate well and so on.
Yan often remarked that my xinxing didn’t measure up, and that was why I could only write long articles, instead of telephone manuscripts. She said the people who answered phone calls didn’t have the time or patience to listen to an entire long article. The practitioners who made calls did not know how to talk following my manuscripts, and they also found it hard to talk with me about the manuscripts. I argued with them, “Can anyone explain the facts in a few words? We must tell the entire story clearly and provide a rational analysis. This is to guide people to be good and save them.”
My argument seemed reasonable on the surface, but it wasn’t until Yan and I were memorizing “Buddha Nature” in Zhuan Falun Volume II that I realized it was my acquired “notions” that were preventing me from removing my attachments, humbly listening and having the wisdom to write manuscripts that met the needs of the practitioners who made calls.
I read an article on the Minghui website in which the author shared that, while studying Master’s lectures, he understood the term “notion” that Master repeatedly referred to – besides articulating it repeatedly in Zhuan Falun from different angles, Master mentioned it in almost every lecture prior to the persecution.
From then on, when other practitioners worked with me to revise my articles and our opinions differed, I reminded myself of Master’s Fa,
“If you can manage not to form any notions, when you look at something you will have the perception of your own kind, innate nature—the view of the true you—and look at the matter charitably.” (“Buddha Nature,” Zhuan Falun Volume II)
When I calmed down and thought about the comments made by other practitioners, I realized that because of my young age and limited life experience, the things I wrote lacked the depth to effectively expose the evil nature of the CCP. As my xinxing improved, I became aware of my problems. Every time I wrote an article and then revised it with the help of other practitioners, it was truly a process of my improvement.
I came to understand that only when we connect our cultivation, our thoughts about life, and the things we have encountered, can our truth-clarification efforts become powerful, and my writing or editing articles in the process are not limited only for the purpose of the the truth-clarification.
Conclusion
There were differences of opinion when cooperating with other practitioners, but we were able to identify our various attachments, endure hardships, and the team as a whole elevated in the process. We all felt the power of Dafa and cherished even more the sacred bond that we’ve formed.
Words cannot express my gratitude to Master. Thank you Master! Thank you fellow practitioners!
(Article for the Annual RTC Experience Sharing Conference 2024)
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