(Minghui.org) Greetings, revered Master! Greetings, fellow practitioners!
One morning, before the 2023 Christmas, I was busy finishing up my work and about to get some rest. Suddenly, I felt dizzy and weak, and had to lean backwards on the sofa. My youngest daughter was shocked to see this and called my oldest daughter in Canberra, and told her that she would call an ambulance. Although I couldn’t move, I was fully conscious and told her not to call an ambulance because I didn’t feel it was that big of a deal. But the ambulance arrived and took me to the hospital. The doctor diagnosed me with high blood pressure that led to a stroke. Realizing the severity of the problem, I called out “Master, help me!” and kept repeating it in my heart.
I had just turned 60 at the time, and I had practiced Falun Dafa for over 20 years. How could this happen to me? I studied the Fa and did the exercises every day even if I was busy, and never failed to do the three things that Dafa disciples ought to do. I clarified the facts on social media and helped promote Gan Jing World for eight years to help save sentient beings. I felt that I was quite diligent, so how could this happen? It was as if this sudden tribulation tossed me from heaven down to earth.
After my daughter told the Canadian Gan Jing World project team about my situation, the coordinator quickly called me and stressed that the most important thing for me was to believe in Master and the Fa. My priority should be negating the old forces’ interference and persecution, studying the Fa and doing the exercises every day. The Canadian team also sent forth righteous thoughts for me before our daily Fa study and sent me Minghui articles on overcoming tribulations through righteous thoughts.
Another practitioner told me, “Don’t worry, we’re all looking within and we’ll get through this together.” Those fellow practitioners really took my things as their things. In the hospital, I was able to connect to the Canadian Fa Study Group through my phone and resumed my daily Fa study with them. Two local practitioners sent me recordings of Master’s lectures and the exercise music, encouraging me by saying, “We have Master and the Fa; you’ll get well soon.”
I felt the beauty and deep predestined relationship I had with these practitioners and their care, which felt like that of a family.
Practicing Diligently Even Though I’m Hospitalized
With Master’s help, and the help of other practitioners, I was able to continue my cultivation throughout my hospital stay. I began to experience one miraculous thing after another. First, the hospital arranged for me to have an independent suite away from everyone else, allowing me to do the exercises and study the Fa freely. I’d initially lost control of my legs and feet, but soon I was able to stand and eventually I could even walk! I knew Master was taking care of me.
I thought to myself: This is Master hinting at me to get rid of my attachments and devote myself to Dafa practice. How could I stay in the hospital, which is for everyday people? I should get out as soon as possible. I still need to work on the Gan Jing World project and if I can’t do what I am responsible for, other practitioners will have to do it. I am well aware of how busy the other team members are. Aside from doing their regular jobs to support themselves financially, they are also working tirelessly on the Gan Jing World project, with little time to rest.
I didn’t want to burden them further, so I asked to be discharged from the hospital as soon as possible. The doctor told me sternly, “With a stroke like yours, it will take at least a few months before you can be discharged.” I thought, a normal person might have to stay in the hospital for a few months, but I’m a Falun Dafa practitioner, and as long as I want to go home, Master will arrange for me to be discharged as soon as possible.
I continued to study the Fa and do the exercises every day, and my health kept improving. Seeing that I was full of energy and dressed neatly every day, the nurses often mistook me for a visitor. Every doctor, nurse, and worker in the stroke rehabilitation ward looking after me praised my hard work and said that I was doing great and was very lucky. Yes, I was very lucky, lucky that I had Master and Dafa; and when I was in the most difficult time, I received timely and sincere support and encouragement from other practitioners.
A month later, I had met the hospital’s criteria for discharge, which was the ability to take care of myself, and I went home without any problems. Some of the medical staff knew that I did the exercises and read the Fa, and witnessed the miraculous and extraordinary power of Dafa. I am very grateful to Master!
Looking Inward to Find the Cause of My Tribulation
After returning home, I reflected on my tribulation and kept looking within.
I reflected on a passage from “Fa Teaching Given at the Meeting with Asia-Pacific Practitioners”:
“Student: Is it true that all of the ordeals disciples now go through are caused by the old forces’ targeting the Fa-rectification?
Master: “No, your ordeals are all part of your cultivation, and the old forces’ interference targets the cultivation of only a small number of you.” (“Fa Teaching Given at the Meeting with Asia-Pacific Practitioners,” in Collected Teachings Given Around the World Volume VI)
I deeply examined myself according to Fa: I saw my attachment to pursuing outcomes when doing things; impatience; competitiveness and so on. In my everyday job, I was competitive and resentful. I also planned to make more money and retire early, so I was busy and exhausted every day. With so many attachments that I couldn’t let go of and so many everyday people's concerns, how could I cultivate myself and improve?
Master’s words made me realize why the old forces were able to persecute me: they saw my strong attachment and inadequacy; plus the karma I had accumulated over previous lifetimes. After cultivating Dafa for over 20 years, I still have so many attachments that I couldn’t let go of and I was trapped at a low level for too long. I needed to improve my xinxing. This lesson taught me that cultivating Dafa is sacred and extremely serious at the same time.
I understood that I needed to let go of the attachment to money. Considering my age and my family’s financial situation, I didn’t need to go to work. When I came home from the hospital, I quit my everyday job and devoted myself to studying the Fa, doing the exercises and saving sentient beings.
It seemed like my hurdle was over, but the tough test of stopping the blood pressure medication was yet to come. After I returned home from the hospital, I was afraid to stop taking the medicine to lower my blood pressure, because I was afraid of ending up in the hospital again. When I was discharged, the doctor warned me many times that if I didn’t take the medication on time, I would risk having a second stroke, and my family was worried about a relapse.
I tried to stop taking the medication once, but when I stopped taking it, I had a severe reaction: my heart pounded and I felt dizzy, so I felt that this approach would not work. So, I agreed with the everyday notion that, “with high blood pressure, you can’t stop taking medication.”
However, I knew clearly in my heart: For a true Dafa disciple, as soon as one begins to practice, Master has purified his or her body to a milky white body which is disease-free.
If I had cultivated my mind and removed karma with each conflict I encountered over the past 25 years of my cultivation, I wouldn’t have had a “stroke.” But I hadn’t done that, and this was a big mistake in my practice. I thought about how Fa-rectification period cultivation is nearly over, but I was still suffering sickness karma, and dared not stop taking the medication.
Do I Truly Believe in Master?
If I truly believed in Master and the Fa, why wouldn’t I stop? Isn’t this stepping on two boats at the same time? Can medicine remove the deep karma that causes “illness” in practitioners? Am I not compromising my faith in Master and Dafa? How could I be considered a true Dafa disciple? I was in great turmoil mentally, not knowing what to do.
I told another practitioner about my situation. I didn’t know her before then, so I dialed her phone number to hear what she thought. She didn’t directly tell me what to do, but rather focused on talking to me about the movie Once We Were Divine that we watched, and shared many of her understandings about the movie. I was surprised that I didn’t see as much as she did, even though we watched the same movie. Why didn’t I get that much from it? Why didn’t see the meaning of the story?
I decided to watch Once We Were Divine again, so I went to the Gan Jing World website and watched it closely. I paid attention to every character and every story in the movie. As I watched, I wept. I even felt that I resembled one of the characters, and my heart was deeply moved.
It occurred to me that I was probably also a Lord, or King, who came to obtain Dafa on behalf of the people in their heavenly world; I seemed to feel the anxiety and disappointment of the people of my heavenly world; I seemed to hear them calling out to me: “If you don’t cultivate well, we’ll be ruined! Was it a mistake to choose you? Have you forgotten our agreement?” A great sense of mission and responsibility brought me to my senses. I thought: Instead of struggling and knowing the Fa but not being able to follow it, shouldn’t I let go of my notion of life and death, and leave everything to Master’s arrangement?
As soon as the thought of letting go of life and death emerged, I had the courage to stop taking medication, and I stopped. This change in my notions was so important. This time I didn’t experience any symptoms like before. I felt as if I never had high blood pressure, and never took any medication. My health improved every day.
Looking back on my experience, I realized that as a cultivator that I shouldn’t have stayed at the hospital. But digging further, if I had complete faith in Master and Dafa, and full of righteous thoughts after coming out of the hospital, my body would have recovered fully. I wouldn’t have had to experience a second tribulation with stopping the hypertension medication, or been swayed by the words of doctors and my family, which led to me taking medication for several months.
The great Buddha Fa was right in front of me, but I didn’t fully believed it at that time, and it’s too late to regret now.
I Finally Identify My Fundamental Attachments
After this huge tribulation, I learned to look inward, and dared to look inward. I thought to myself: Both the Canadian practitioners and I are all working on the Gan Jing World project to save sentient beings. Those Canadian practitioners have invested more time and effort than I have, and have assumed greater and heavier responsibilities than me, and they study the Fa and do the exercises every day.
Why is it that others are fine, and I got into difficulty? Isn’t the problem with me? Could it have been caused in a day or two? Hasn’t it accumulated over a long period of time of me not being willing to let go of my attachments?
I also realized that I was not understanding and tolerant, which is a big problem. I understood that only by being understanding and tolerant, can I elevate my realm and better save sentient beings. Otherwise, even though I made some achievements in some projects, I cannot be considered a true practitioner unless I improve my xinxing. If I do things with attachments, no matter how much I do, I’m still not a genuine practitioner, which is why I experienced such a serious medical condition.
Even though I did so poorly, Master didn’t give up on me, and helped me get through the tribulation and kept me alive. Thank you, Master.
Inspired by other practitioners’ experiences, I increased my Fa study time by watching at least one of Master’s 9-day lectures in Guangzhou while sitting in the full lotus position. Sometimes I watched two or even three lectures in a row. No matter how painful my legs felt, I wouldn’t take them down. By insisting on doing this, I could not only study the Fa and improve, but also endure the pain and eliminate my karma. After a few months, although I was busy every day, my body was getting better and better, my mood was more relaxed, and I felt that I was Master’s true disciple who genuinely cultivates.
I am very grateful for Master’s compassionate salvation. I would like to thank all the Canadian practitioners who have been studying the Fa and working on the programs that save sentient beings for the past eight years. I would also like to thank every practitioner who has helped me. I’m determined to let go of my attachments as soon as possible. And in accordance with Master’s teachings, I will treat all the bad things that I encounter as opportunities to improve my cultivation, so as to live up to Master’s compassionate salvation, and return to my true home with Master!
This is my current limited understanding, please correct anything that is not in line with the Fa.
Thank you, Master! Thank you, fellow practitioners!
(Presented at the 2024 Australia Falun Dafa Cultivation Experience Sharing Conference)
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