Looking Inside After Enduring a Troublesome Situation

(Minghui.org) Another practitioner’s printer needed to be repaired, but since I was not familiar with his HP PageWide MFP (multi-function printer), I contacted the practitioners in the city who were familiar with the printer and asked for help. When they could not come, I realized that I should stop depending on others and try to solve the problem myself.

I downloaded the printer information from the Internet, studied it for a day, and thought I could handle the repair. I thought he wouldn’t be as busy in the afternoon, so I went to his home at 2 p.m. the next day. He happened to be occupied with business at his store when I arrived. He took me to the printing room at his home and then returned to his store. He told me I could find him there if I needed him.

A Troublesome Situation

As I was repairing the printer, I suddenly heard a loud “pop.” I looked around and saw nothing wrong, but I noticed the ceiling fan above me sounded odd. When I looked up, I saw the fan was hanging by its electrical wires—and it was still spinning! As soon as I moved away from under the fan, it fell down. I cleaned up the debris and continued repairing the printer.

A few hours later, the printer was working again. I felt happy, thinking that we could handle some printer problems by ourselves from then on. It was about 6 p.m. I locked the door and walked to the gate of the yard.

However, the gate was locked, and I couldn’t get out. I wandered around in the yard trying to find a way out. I found a small ladder, but when I climbed it, I saw that the alley outside the wall also had a gate. It was locked, too, so I couldn’t get out even if I climbed over the wall. I had no choice but to wait.

Struggling to Maintain My Xinxing

It was a hot and humid summer day, and the yard was full of mosquitoes. Waiting was torturous. From time to time, I started to complain to myself about the practitioner, but I rejected them as soon as they popped up. I had experienced a similar issue not long before, and I had learned the lesson. On a business trip with a colleague, I had inadvertently complained about something, which caused the colleague who often complained to keep reproaching me: “You’re getting old. Why are you complaining? How many more years before you retire?” I realized that I didn’t maintain my xinxing, and I immediately apologized. That lesson alerted me to my negative thoughts, and I therefore believed that I was locked in the yard for a reason. It must be for me to further discard my attachment. To calm my mind, I sat on a small stool in the yard and started reading the information I’d brought to repair the printer.

After I’d finished reading, it was getting dark. The mosquitoes got really bad, and I was thirsty. I finished up the last drop of water I’d brought with me. My thoughts became unbalanced again, and I began complaining to myself about the practitioner: “You are busy, but your wife should be back by now. Although we are fellow practitioners, you shouldn’t simply forget about me.” As soon as these thoughts popped up, I immediately realized that I was blaming him rather than cultivating myself and that I had trapped myself in the mindset of analyzing who was right and who was wrong.

Many conflicts recently occurred among our local practitioners, so I downloaded Minghui articles to share with them. We discussed not judging right and wrong while being trapped in a troublesome situation. I said that we should look within to cultivate ourselves instead. However, when I faced the situation myself, I failed to stay calm, and I realized that this was not as easy as I thought!

It got dark, and the mosquitoes were having a field day. I paced around in the yard and kept reciting On Dafa. I begged Master to let the practitioner come home as soon as possible.

When the practitioner came home at around 9 p.m. to get something, he said he’d forgotten I was there. I shared my thought, “It’s difficult to keep up with reading the Fa and doing the exercises when one works long hours. If we slack off in our cultivation, we can also have problems with our equipment.” It seemed that I was sharing, but I had the mentality of accusing him.

Searching Inside Afterwards

I shared this experience with my wife (also a practitioner) after I got home. She said, “It sounds like you think it was his fault. You should examine yourself for the reason it happened.”

With my wife’s reminder, I realized that I must look inside. However, I still looked outward from time to time even though I was attempting to look inside. I thought: “What did I do wrong? I was trying my best to help him. It was his cultivation state that caused me unnecessary trouble.” I knew those thoughts were not based on the Fa, and I tried to reject them.

I asked myself after calming down, “Why did he lock me in his home?” I suddenly realized that Master was giving me hints to look for my own attachments quietly by myself. My mind then opened up, and I felt relieved.

I thought carefully about some recent happenings that were seemly the problems of other practitioners, but they were actually something for me to cultivate. I found that I had similar attachments that I needed to cultivate away. One practitioner couple had conflicts, and I had conflicts with my wife. Two sister practitioners could not read the Fa together for several days because of attachments to their families and to themselves. I also treated my practitioner wife differently from other practitioners, and I would pay special attention to the things if they happened to my wife. Another practitioner who handled a material production site often had conflicts with a practitioner who distributed the materials. I noticed that one of them was not very responsible due to fear while the other was very opinionated. But, when I saw the situation, I did not think about my responsibility and whether I should do anything to harmonize the situation.

I realized that while I was locked in the practitioner’s yard, I only thought about my own difficulties. I did not consider the practitioner’s situation, and I blamed him for locking me in his yard. He and his wife were busy with their business recently. They seemed to have slacked off in cultivation while handling their business, but they had worked very hard to help people understand the truth about Dafa for many years. They put in much more effort than I did, their children were all old enough to get married, but they were still living in a rented home. I, on the other hand, was free of burdens, but I did not concentrate on Dafa projects. I was often attached to my smartphone and read the news. I was also attached to the time when the Fa-Rectification would conclude.

When the fan dropped from the ceiling, I thought it was very dangerous and I complained to myself about the practitioner. After I calmed down and looked inward, I realized: I did not cultivate myself! I am a coordinator and responsible for resolving technical issues, and I have contacts with many other practitioners. My wife often reminded me that I tended to believe I was better than others and wanted to teach them lessons. Although I didn’t say anything, I disagreed with her in my mind. Through this experience, I realized that, although I spoke fluently, I failed to truly cultivate myself when I was faced with a challenging situation. It was just like the fan: it worked well when it was firmly attached to the ceiling, but if it fell, it would be dangerous.

Difficult Situations Test Our Character

By looking inside, I found many attachments. I realized that cultivation is always about cultivating one’s mind and heart nature (xinxing). A situation that touches one’s heart tests one’s cultivation. I also understood that, through difficult situations and conflicts, whether they’re big or small, a practitioner progresses in his cultivation by solidly cultivating through these tests.

Master said,

“The superior man meets adversity head-on with a smileThe average man can nary keep calm when faced with ordealThe lesser man fails to abolish his human wants and thoughts”(“The Challenges of Saving Self and Other,” Hong Yin VI)

I felt ashamed that I failed to face the situation calmly. I must diligently study the Fa and cultivate myself solidly. Only by doing so can I live up to Master’s compassionate salvation.

Thank you, Master. Thank you, fellow practitioners.