Cultivating Amid Conflicts

(Minghui.org) This year was the most difficult year for me during my more than 20 years of cultivation. Two other practitioners and I read the Fa together. We formed a small group in which conflicts played out constantly. It was only through these various conflicts, and in that cultivation environment, that my negative thoughts and notions were exposed. I strove to correct myself, hoping to meet Master’s requirements through constant Fa study and understanding of the Fa principles at different levels.

Conflicts with Others Exposed My Attachment

Our little group was not harmonious, and we did not communicate with one another well.

Sometimes I wanted to leave the group because I thought it would be better if everyone studied the Fa calmly by themselves, and regrouped after making some improvements individually. However, this did not meet with Master’s requirements of studying the Fa as a group. I knew my thought was wrong, so I stayed.

Master said,

“If you, as my student, truly want to “help Master rectify the Fa,” then you should concern yourself only with how to best fulfill what Master wants. This alone is what you should be doing, yet you want instead for Master to help you? How could you use Dafa during the Fa-rectification to instead help fulfill your human ideas?” (“What Does It Mean to “Help Master Rectify the Fa”?,” The Essentials of Diligent Progress III)

I understood the only right thing to do would be to do what Master asked of us. Master wants us to study the Fa together, so we must study the Fa as a group. It was easy to understand the principle, but difficult to put into action.

The three of us could not share our thoughts with one another freely. We feared that one of us would get offended, and conflicts and arguments would follow. I felt depressed and unhappy. Old memories surfaced, of my feelings of grievance, helplessness, and confusion while being misunderstood, accused and humiliated. I knew I had a lot of attachments to let go of, but I didn’t know how to.

I had a dream the night I almost made up my mind to leave the group. In my dream, I couldn’t find The Great Way of Spiritual Perfection until I realized I left it at the practitioner’s home. I knew Master was using the dream to enlighten me not to leave the one body and the environment, and that I should make a breakthrough in my cultivation.

I thought about Master’s teachings, and thought about the “great forbearance” (Lecture Nine, Zhuan Falun) of Han Xin who was able to bear great humiliation. I felt I should focus on cultivating myself.

I knew I should meet Master’s requirements for practitioners, but I still didn’t know what to do exactly, and what to do to lighten my heart. I wanted to achieve the state of being melted into the Fa.

Seeing my confusion and my inability to get out, Master showed me, in a layer of Fa principles, what tolerance is and what it takes to achieve altruism.

I understand that we are one body, and I am a part of it. If I failed to cultivate well, I would be playing a bad role among the one body. I understood I should cultivate myself well, take my share of responsibility, and be a positive catalyst in harmonizing the one body.

I began to realize that as a Dafa practitioner, a future great enlightened being in the new cosmos, I would be a guardian of the cosmos who would be responsible for all righteous elements in the cosmos. I should increase my capacity and be able to give everything for all beings.

I realized if I did not cultivate well and failed to meet the requirements of the Fa, the sentient beings in my own world would not be saved. Each Falun Dafa practitioner represents a universe, and my universe is just one particle in the large celestial body.

Wouldn’t my failure to cultivate well affect the entire celestial body’s rectification and affect Master’s Fa-rectification progress? With that, what personal feelings, personal gains and losses, personal glory or shame can’t I let go of?

Looking inward, I saw what I could not let go of was nothing but status, personal gain and the emotions of everyday people. When I understood the layer of Fa principles and wanted to assimilate to it, Master removed the heavy substance that was weighing me down. I instantly felt the sky and the earth were clear and wide.

Removing Discontent

Looking inward in the midst of conflict, I discovered that although many things were troubling me, one attachment manifested everywhere. and had been deposited deeply, namely, the attachment of “discontent with someone or something.” This attachment is particularly easy to develop amid conflicts. It manifests widely and affects not only me, but also others.

In my limited understanding, one cannot be truly truthful and compassionate when carrying the attachment of discontent (resentment), let alone tolerant. How can I be truthful and compassionate if I have discontent in my heart and look down on, or even despise the other practitioners? How could I disintegrate the bad elements in my environment? And how could I treat others with tolerance?

I realized my “discontent” primarily came from selfishness, self-obsession and ego. It does not accord with the Fa.

Master said,

“He’s right,And I’m wrong,What’s to dispute?”(“Who’s Right, Who’s Wrong,” Hong Yin III)

With the attachment of discontent, one’s first thought during times of conflict would always be, “He is wrong, and I am right” in handling matters and interacting with others, one would be unhappy with what has been done. Moreover, one would develop complacency, self-righteousness and so on; and one would assess people and matters based on their notions instead of the Fa.

If one expresses discontent in a group frequently, instability tends to arise and separations tend to form.

One of my printer’s ink cartridges stopped working well recently. In a Minghui website article a practitioner said that one should fix one’s cultivation problems before fixing the machine. I began to look inward, layer by layer, to see what attachments or bad substance I hadn’t eliminated that prevented the ink from flowing properly.

I watched every thought of mine and was startled to find out all my afflictions and frustrations came from my discontent with a certain practitioner! “She has hurt me, wronged me, and badmouthed me...” How could I be happy when I was immersed in so many negative thoughts!

Making truth-clarification materials while producing such bad, dark substances, what good could they do when I, the printer, the materials and the sentient beings are one field and one body? How could the printer’s head not be clogged? How could I not be frustrated? Can the materials made with such a mindset save people?

As soon as I identified my deeply embedded feelings of discontent, I sent righteous thoughts constantly to eliminate the bad thoughts and bad substances.

I looked further inward, and realized resentment had been deposited in layers upon layers of notions: I was unhappy with others’ attitude, behavior, and way of doing things. With so much discontent in my heart, how could I be truly truthful, compassionate and tolerant among others? How could I cooperate with others to accomplish a common task together?

The attachment of discontent not only hinders my own improvement, but also affects the one body’s overall harmony and improvement. I sent righteous thoughts intensively and more frequently to remove it completely.

I felt relaxed after doing this for some time, and stopped thinking about the shortcomings of fellow practitioners. Those conflicts suddenly seemed remote. I stopped looking at others’ shortcomings, and was no longer affected by everyday people’s affairs.

I decided to assimilate to the Fa by following Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance and to treat others well. The process of removing the attachment of discontent was also the process of removing selfishness and ego.

Epilogue

My experiences this past year helped me realize it was very important to view a problem from different standpoints.

In my understanding, when we encounter a problem, only when we realize we are a particle of Dafa, and we want to assimilate to the Fa unconditionally, and want to harmonize what Master wants, can we correct ourselves and melt into the Fa. Only when Master shows us the Fa principles can we see different levels of the Fa and cultivate according to the Fa of that level.

Master is right next to us, watching over us and protecting us compassionately. Master will give us hints and enlighten us using various people and things. For example, Master arranged for the printer to remind me what caused the tightness in my heart.

Only when we let go of all kinds of human attachments and notions, and hold ourselves to a higher standard, can we gradually reach the standard of the great enlightened beings of the future new cosmos.

Thank you, Master, for your compassion! Thank you, fellow practitioners! Let’s encourage each other and improve together!