I Must Always Use the Fa Principles to Guide Me

(Minghui.org) Last year, I lived with my daughter so I could take care of my grandson. One morning, I took my grandson with me and went out to clarify the truth about Falun Dafa and the persecution. I met a lady crossing the street and greeted her. I asked her if we could have a chat, and she agreed. She stared at my face while I was clarifying the truth to her. When I finished, she said, “I think you have heart disease. I mean it.”

I didn’t mind what she said. However, she repeatedly stressed her point and would no longer listen to me. I had to bid farewell to her.

My daughter and son-in-law are both college lecturers and had to give lectures in the evening, so I had to take care of my grandson for extended hours. I strove to persevere with studying the Fa and doing the exercises. I typically waited for my grandson to go to bed before I began studying the Fa, from 10:30p.m. to 1:00a.m., followed by the exercises. I usually got up with my grandson between 7:30 and 8:00a.m. During the day, when my grandson was taking a nap, I read articles on the Minghui website or made truth-clarification materials.

I hoped my husband would help me take care of our grandson, but was disappointed that he didn’t. My xinxing dropped due to resentment toward my husband and long term fatigue. I felt mentally and physically exhausted, and often felt my heart was beating out of my chest, typically accompanied by sweating and panting. I had to lie down for a while to regain my strength.

I was alarmed by my physical state. Master’s Fa came to mind: 

“By July 20^th of 1999 I had already pushed all of the pre-July 20 students to their positions—I pushed you to your highest positions.” (Teachings From a Tour of North America) 

I thought, “I transcended the three realms a long time ago. Why does my body still act like an everyday person sometimes?” Suddenly, it dawned on me that although Master has pushed me to my position, my mind (xinxing) is still at the level of everyday people. My mind has not transcended the three realms; in other words, it is hampering my body. That’s why my body is subject to the constraints of the three realms and has an incorrect state.

I decided to conduct myself with calmness and peacefulness, and learn to improve how I talk to others. I printed some words out and hung them on my bedroom wall to remind myself to keep improving and to hold myself to higher standards.

I finally waited until summer when my daughter and son-in-law were free, and returned home to my original cultivation environment. I joined the group Fa study every day and began to memorize the Fa on my own. I memorized Zhuan Falun twice in 84 days. 

I looked inward and gained some understanding of how my cultivation state had been when I was at my daughter’s home. Although I had looked inside then, I was only ‘superficially mending the fold after the sheep had been stolen.’ It was not enough to just identify the attachment. I should face the attachment without running away from it or being perfunctory; I should continue to examine the notions behind the attachment until I solve the problem at the root, and improve myself. 

I thought about the lady who insisted that I had a heart condition, which I found ridiculous at the time. She was hinting that I had undetected attachments and notions. I also recalled that my daughter searched online about my physical symptoms and told me it was myocardial ischemia. I casually said, “I had this problem and was examined at the Fuwai Hospital in Beijing, but it’s been long gone since I began practicing Falun Dafa. It’s been more than 20 years, and I have forgotten all about it, even though the symptoms are the same.”

Why did that illusion of sickness-karma occur? I recall that Master said:

“As a practitioner, if you always think that it is an illness, you are actually asking for it. If you ask for an illness, it will come inside your body.” (Lecture Six, Zhuan Falun) 

One would say, “I didn’t ask for it, who would ask for a disease?” But Master has said that we are, in fact, asking for it if we think it is an illness. I was putting myself in the seat, wasn’t I pursuing it? That was why the illusion happened – I had invited it because my mind was not right.

I met a fellow practitioner and we exchanged understandings. She said she had recently listened to the Minghui Radio program “Remembering Master’s Grace” twice in a row. I asked her what her greatest takeaway was. She said firmly, “Do not dilute Master’s words.” 

Her words touched me. I thought there must be some hidden notions that caused my pursuit, or that there must be some other aspects of disbelief in the Fa. 

I downloaded some Minghui Compilations, including “Remembering Master’s Grace,” “Break out of Sickness Demon,” “Transcend Human,” and “Find Rescue in Despair” to read. There was a practitioner’s sharing in “Find Rescue in Despair” that I found enlightening. The fellow practitioner had necrosis of the femoral head before he began practicing cultivation. To validate Dafa’s supernatural nature, he went to the hospital and had a new x-ray done after he practiced Dafa. The new x-ray showed the femoral head had gone from rotting to the point of blossoming. 

The doctor said to the practitioner, “Bring the patient to me please.” The practitioner said, “The x-ray is mine.” The doctor thought he didn’t understand him, so the doctor said it again. The practitioner said, “The x-ray is mine. Look at me, I can walk and run.” The doctor was in awe.

His story shattered my notion of ‘seeing is believing.’ This hidden notion of mine was finally exposed. I gained a new understanding from this: xinxing cultivation is complete only when I look inside and apply the Fa principles to solve the problem when it arises; I must always use the Fa principles to guide me; and do not think or act according to human notions at all. 

I must completely and uncompromisingly use Master’s Fa to guide me, find out what Master asks of us, and not let it go until I completely understand the matter. Only by cultivating ourselves well, will our words carry the power of the Fa, and can we better save people and fulfill our great prehistoric vows.

This concludes my limited understanding. Please correct me if anything is improper.