(Minghui.org) Ever since I started practicing Falun Dafa, my life has been filled with light and hope. What is the true meaning of life? How should human beings live? I’ve found the answers to these important questions through Falun Dafa cultivation.
Guided by the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance, I am able to remain optimistic most of the time, no matter the difficulties I have to face, at work, or when I interact with my family. Dafa is the reason that I continuously try to improve myself, strive to be a better person, and never feel lost.
Sticking to My Principles, and Not Being Afraid to Be “Disliked”
We follow the actions and behavior of our peers. This tendency is especially prominent in women, given our gentle nature. Compared to men, we’re more likely to agree and go along with the opinion of the people we associate with.
However, morals in today’s society are in a rapid decline. Even the three groups of people that we used to believe could never turn corrupt – judges, doctors, and teachers – are now often reported of having been involved in scandals. Many people will not stop from committing evil, and do anything they please.
In such an environment, it is difficult to adhere to ethical principles and maintain moral integrity. However, cultivating in Falun Dafa gives me the courage to stick to my principles in such an ever-changing world. I sometimes even go completely against the current trend, and bring positive development to my environment.
My employer is rated as being among the top 500 companies of the world. I am a business administrator and currently hold the position of senior executive secretary. When working with higher ups from my own company, as well as from our manufacturers, entertainment and gift exchanges are unavoidable. Yet, I am able to hold myself to high moral standards, and conduct myself well.
One of the manufacturers that we buy from gave us their high-end products as gifts one time during the quality control phase of the purchase. My co-workers didn’t think much of it and took them. I, however, insisted that I wouldn’t take any gifts. My turning down the gift also helped my friend decide to do the same. Even though it was a small gift, it was important to me that we shouldn’t do a wrong deed just because it seems a small thing. This is very important to me as a practitioner.
The president of another manufacturing company gave me a new year gift one time and said it was handmade by his relative. Out of respect, I took it, but gave him a gift of equal value. I explained that I usually don’t take any gifts and kindly asked him not to prepare gifts for me in the future. In working with his company, I merely did what I was supposed to do and did not expect more than my salary. When I am invited to banquets or treated to business meals, I also return the favor with a gift that I pay out of my own pocket.
In fact, before I started cultivating in Dafa, I didn’t have an opinion concerning most issues. To put it nicely, I was easy-going, but to put it critically, I was trying to please everybody, and lacked principles. If my supervisor told me to do something, I’d do it blindly without thinking much about it. Especially when I was under pressure, I would abandon ethical principles, and was easily swayed and become corrupt.
Luckily, I practice Falun Dafa. I remember Master Li Hongzhi’s teachings and always uphold my belief in Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. Even though sometimes people don’t understand me, I stick to my principles, and do the right thing without being worried of being “disliked.”
I’ve being following Master’s teachings in handling things at work for the past several years. Actually, no one “dislikes” me. On the contrary, I’ve earned the respect of many colleagues. My friends always come to me for advice when they run into problems, and I always try to help with the wisdom I’ve gained from Dafa.
Becoming a Team Player, and Practicing Forbearance
Before I started practicing Falun Dafa, I was always the center of attention and spoiled by people around me, and thus I always felt superior to others. I was stubborn and irrational. Although a nice person in general, I was quick to start an argument whenever I felt that I was being treated unfairly. When I encountered rude servers at restaurants, I wanted that “justice” be served.
After taking up Falun Dafa, I told myself that I had to control my temper and truly put into practice Dafa’s principle of Forbearance. While working with a friend one time, this friend all of a suddenly became very unhappy with me. I felt it was unfair and said, “I have already explained it to you. It is not like this at all.”
But I immediately realized, “Am I looking at the issue from a selfish perspective? Why don’t I try to consider it from the other party’s angle?” My friend had a huge workload and was working very hard, but I only wanted others to accommodate me. Plus, do I not have any shortcomings of my own? I looked inward and was surprised to find many bad notions, including the attachment to comfort, trying to evade responsibility, and not wanting to be accountable. I sincerely wanted to thank my friend. If I didn’t reflect on his attitude, I would have not been able to find all my shortcomings.
I realized that others give us suggestions, because they want to do things well, or they want us to do well. However, their words are oftentimes not what we would like to hear. But, it is because they see our problems that they point them out to us. From a cultivator’s perspective, isn’t their pointing out our shortcomings an act of kindness? Just because we don’t like their words or their ways of expressing it, we push away this precious opportunity, and do not improve ourselves. Isn’t that unfortunate?
What’s incredible was that as soon as I started to reflect on the issue, my friend acted as if nothing had ever happened. Through this incident, my xinxing elevated and my physical body felt light and comfortable. It was truly a dramatic change.
While working with a team on another project, a team member gave an unreasonable suggestion. I was frustrated because it was truly “ridiculous.” However, as a cultivator, I was able to control myself. I decided not to respond to him right away. After I calmed down, I wrote down my thoughts, in a kind and constructive way, with the other person’s best interest in mind. This piece of writing started an open conversation among the team members—we communicated, discussed, and eventually achieved very good results.
I believed that when working with a team, it is normal to have different opinions. As a cultivator I should accept an opinion that might be different from mine. I shouldn’t feel superior to others and that my idea has to be the right one. Through communication, we can arrive at an agreement and solve the problem as a team. If we can’t solve the problem right away, we should each take a step back and give it more thought. All roads lead to Rome—and we can achieve the same result through our different ways. We shouldn’t impose our ideas on others and force others to do what we want—this is common courtesy when working as a team.
I was convinced that each time I feel unhappy, it was because of my attachments. It is a great opportunity to discover my notions and shortcomings. As long as I am willing to look within and change my thinking and ways, problems can become good things that move myself and my team forward.
Getting Rid of Resentment
Before cultivating in Dafa, I was single-minded and a perfectionist. I couldn’t tolerate anything that I didn’t agree with. I would hold resentment for years because of trivial things. To me, there was no gray area between love and hate. If I felt that someone did something wrong, I would feel angry and resent that person. After cultivating in Dafa, however, I have increased my capacity to tolerate. I learned to let go of my resentment and be considerate of others with a kind heart.
A supervisor’s attitude toward me took a 180 degree turn a few years back. She used to be nice and easy-going, but all of a sudden became very difficult and nitpicked a lot. Hardly any case could get past her. Her instructions were often not consistent nor logical. Sometimes, I had to change a document back and forth over a dozen times for her. Working for her became very difficult. I resented her, felt that it was unfair, and wondered why she treated me this way.
Master said,
“…there may be two scenarios when dealing with specific conflicts or when others treat you badly. One is that you might have treated this person badly in your previous life. You feel in your heart that it is unfair, “How can this person treat me like this?” Then why did you treat this person that way in the past? You might claim that you actually did not know it at that time, and this lifetime has nothing to do with another lifetime, but that won’t do. There is another issue. In conflicts, the issue of transforming karma is involved. Therefore, when actually dealing with conflicts we should take the high road instead of acting like everyday people.” (Lecture Four, Zhuan Falun)
I realized that with the way my supervisor was treating me, I probably treated her badly in the past and now I needed to repay the debt.
Master said, “…cultivators have no enemies…” (“Turning the Wheel Towards the Human World,” The Essentials of Diligent Progress III)
I promised myself that I would truly maintain my xinxing and not create any conflict with her. However, we all know the Fa principles well but truly putting them into practice is difficult. When I thought of her words and facial expressions, I sometimes got really worked up. I just suppressed it and endured it. Just like that, I put Forbearance into practice and accepted her attitude.
I was later transferred to a different department, but my resentment toward my former supervisor was not resolved. I held on to the negatives feelings until a year later, when I learned that she was soon going to retire. I knew that if I didn’t relinquish my resentment then, I would not have another chance. So I let go of my anger completely and paid my former supervisor a visit with a card and a gift. She was very touched and gave me a big hug. All was resolved.
Being in this world, everyone is living a hard life. I learned that a being that is always considerate of others is the most happy being. Such a person is kind, benevolent and will assimilate to the characteristic of the universe. It is true freedom.
Master said, “The same applies to human beings, who possess Buddha-nature and demon-nature at the same time.” (“Buddha-Nature and Demon-Nature,” Essentials For Further Advancement)
As humans, we cannot avoid making mistakes. Each and every person around us has a great predestined relationship with us. A person’s mistakes don’t represent this person’s true nature. As a cultivator, I am willing to always keep a heart of kindness, and bring the importance of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance to everyone.
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Category: Improving Oneself