(Minghui.org) I have practiced Falun Dafa for eight years, and I turned 40 this year. I always had a vague memory that suggested that my home is in the heavens and that I have family members there. But, why did I come here? Sometimes I felt that I really wanted to go back home, and tried to search for a way to do so. However, I could not find the way, and no one could help me. Yet, I believed that one day there would be a supernormal human being coming to find me, and take me to the path home. This thought has always been in my mind, even though I didn’t tell anyone.
I made a friend online in 2012, who told me later that he was a Falun Dafa practitioner. He recounted many miraculous cultivation stories on his website. Most people might not believe them, but I did and I was very interested in them. At the time, I could often see things when I closed my eyes, and no one could explain to me why. When I asked him, he told me his cultivation experiences, the amazing miracles he’d experienced, why, and how the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) has slandered Falun Dafa. He also spoke about the torture that Falun Dafa practitioners have suffered in the CCP’s persecution. He told me that Dafa’s founder, Master Li Hongzhi, was the “Holy King Who Turns the Wheel,” and he also talked about the udumbara flower [according to Buddhist belief, the rare udumbara flower blossoms once every 3,000 years, and coincides with the arrival of a great Buddha].
I was fascinated, and I told him about the encounters and tribulations I’d experienced through life, and how desperate I was to return to the heavens. He said, “You should start to cultivate. Only cultivation can take you back home.” But, I said, “Let me wait until I find the predestined relationship with Master, and then I’ll cultivate with you.”
Our compassionate Master saw how lost I was, and let me find the answer I was looking for. I was very excited and told my online friend, “I found it! I’ll cultivate with you!”
He sent me the electronic version of the book Zhuan Falun. However, my thought karma was strong, and I didn’t read it immediately. I knew that Dafa was good, and I didn’t like the CCP, because the CCP always lies to people. So, when he told me about quitting the CCP and its youth organizations, I agreed without hesitating. Master saw that I still would not enlighten, so He continued to hint.
Master said:
“It is because a practitioner is most precious, for he or she wants to practice cultivation. Therefore, developing this thought is most precious. In Buddhism, people talk about Buddha-nature. When a person’s Buddha-nature emerges, the enlightened beings are able to help him.” (Lecture One, Zhuan Falun)
One day I was going to take a nap at noon. My brain was still clear, and I saw amazing things with my third eye. A square-shaped seal floated toward me, and entered the room through the window. As it got close to me, it turned into a scroll and slowly opened up. It had a type of traditional Chinese characters on it and it showed them to me in vertical lines, from right to left. But, I couldn’t recognize any of the characters. It then appeared one more time but I still couldn’t understand it. I was so eager to know, opened my eyes, and everything disappeared.
I was curious and I asked the veteran practitioner about it. He showed me a video about an imminent catastrophe hitting the universe, and many divine beings coming down to earth. But, I lost internet connection before it finished.
Then. I experienced some dizziness for some time. I used to get dizzy in the past, and so I didn’t think about it much. Soon I became normal again. Several days later, at night my heart rate suddenly went wild. I was in bed and I couldn’t get up. No one was at home, and there was no medicine. I was very scared and desperate, and I talked to the veteran practitioner again. He told me to ask Dafa’s Master for help, but I hesitated. After some back and forth I said in my mind, “Holy King Who Turns the Wheel, if you and I truly have a predestined relationship, please help me!” After a while my heart rate returned to normal. Then during the middle of that night, I felt a stream of air circulating in my body. It made me very warm and I didn’t need a blanket.
The next day, I felt a force drilling inward between my eyebrows. I talked to the practitioner who said, “Congratulations. Master has accepted you as a disciple and opened up your celestial eye.” I asked him what that was. He said, “Did you read the book? The answer is in it.”
That’s when I started to read Zhuan Falun. I finally found the Master that I had been looking for, and I found the answers to all the questions I had over the years. I finally obtained the Fa!
I had a dream not long after. I saw a large golden ship in a very large yard and I was jumping up and down like a kid, yelling “The ship is here!” From studying the Fa, I knew that this was the Fa ship, meant to save sentient beings. I had finally found my way to the heavens.
When I first read Zhuan Falun, I was fascinated by the profound Fa principles. Master explained everything so clearly, and I finally understood the reasons behind the tribulations I encountered. I continued to study Master’s Fa teachings, and I learned the exercises from a videos online. I began to send forth righteous thoughts and got on the Minghui website with fellow practitioners’ help. Minghui helped me learn more about Dafa and the persecution. I cried when I read about the many cases of Dafa practitioners being persecuted. I could not imagine that such cruel torture could happen in this world to people who just want to cultivate and become better.
I put the link for breaking through the internet censorship on my online space. I wanted all people to know the truth, the evilness of the CCP, and the kindness and compassion of Dafa practitioners. I also tried to learn from veteran practitioners how to clarify the truth.
However, I still only had a perceptual understanding of Dafa. I did not understand the essence of cultivation. I thought I already cultivated pretty well and had good inborn quality. In reality, over the years I had formed strong notions while being indoctrinated by the CCP. I was very controlling, competitive, self-centered, suspicious, and jealous. I was not considerate when it came to others’ feelings and I only looked outward, instead of trying to find my own shortcomings. This caused many conflicts between me and fellow practitioners, but I still thought that I was doing things correctly.
Master saw that I could not enlighten and hinted again. One morning, I just woke up and I saw an animated shadow play on the wall. Two small guys were fighting, one holding a spear and the other holding a shield. I immediately realized that Master was telling me that I did not look inside when encountering conflicts. [In Chinese, the word for “conflict” is two characters that literally means “spear shield.”] I only tried to find what others did wrong.
Master said,
“Cultivators, from the appearance, aren’t any different from ordinary people. It’s not as if after taking up cultivation in Dafa you’ll look like a divine being overnight. There’s no change in appearance. The only change as you walk upon this path to divinity is that the way you think about things will be different from how ordinary people do. Some people appear to be quite diligent as they cultivate, studying the Fa and doing the exercises, but they don’t look within. But if you don’t look within, think about it, aren’t you an ordinary person then? Does any ordinary person look within? Which ordinary person can look within? Suppose someone tries to reflect on where he did wrong in any disagreement he comes across, and apologizes to the other party after figuring things out, well, if he’s in China, people will think he is crazy. That’s because the morals of the whole society have been ruined by that evil Party. No ordinary person would look at problems that way. Instead, when he gets into a disagreement he usually points fingers at the other party, and tensions escalate. Dafa disciples aren’t like that.” (“Fa Teaching Given at the 2015 New York Fa Conference”)
Master’s Fa was cleansing my heart again and again. I began to learn how to apologize and how to not point fingers at others. When I felt angry, wronged, and sad, I would think about what I did wrong, and how I didn’t think about others first.
The internet enabled me to learn about the persecution, study the Fa, and be saved. However, just like Master said,
“This society is already a mess, and on the Internet all bad things are stirred in, just like demons, circulating. Whatever goes in is stirred in there or mixed in there, disrupting society, the human mind, and morality, and changing people's living state—the good and the bad are all jumbled together.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2016 New York Fa Conference”)
My cultivation state was not good when I first began to cultivate. Other than occasionally studying the Fa using my laptop, I spent most of my time chatting, singing, and browsing online. I even found excuses for myself to do so – to form good relationships with ordinary people so that I could clarify the facts. This made it very difficult for me to be able to study the Fa with a clear and calm mind. I would be online continuously for a long period of time, while not doing any housework or taking care of my child.
Master gave me hints many times in my dreams. I knew I was wrong but I could not change. One day, I went to work, and my husband came back home and saw that there was nothing to eat at home. He was very angry and broke my laptop by throwing it to the ground. He then called me, and he yelled and cursed at me. I felt so terrible. Feelings of resentment, wanting to save my face, and feeling wronged went through my mind.
I tried hard and I did not argue with him when I got home. I tried to calm myself down and look for my issues. I still had electronic books on my phone, so I was able to study the Fa. After reading a teaching from 2014, I had a thought that I wanted a printed book. So I said to Master, “Master, I want to have a printed version of Zhuan Falun.” Master saw my wish and arranged it for me. I got to know another practitioner online who also learned about Dafa from the internet. He asked me, “Would you like a book? I have books.” I was so excited and asked him where he got them. He said that he went to Hong Kong and got them from practitioners there. He happened to be going on a business trip and was passing by the city I was in, so he brought them to me.
I got several Dafa books from him, including Zhuan Falun. I knew that Master was encouraging me to be more diligent. I gradually left the virtual world online and returned to the real world. I began to clarify the truth to friends, family members and co-workers, as well as the people I met on the street. I wrote “Falun Dafa is good; Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good” on blank bookmarks and gave them to people after they understood the facts about Dafa.
Through Master’s arrangement, I encountered a local practitioner on the street, and then met another practitioner on the bus, who lived nearby. I joined the local Fa study group. I began to study the Fa and send forth righteous thoughts with fellow practitioners in the Fa study group and we shared with each other and clarified the truth together. The Fa study group provided me a normal cultivation environment. My mother and an old classmate also began Dafa cultivation.
Bathed in the light of Dafa and fulfilling my prehistorical vows, I know that everything was carefully arranged by Master – from the time I first learned about Dafa, all the way to today. I would not have gotten this far without Master’s protection, care, and veteran practitioners’ selfless help.
Ever since the persecution began on July 20, 1999, veteran practitioners have persisted in clarifying the truth. They are like the giant trees, giving out seeds of hope to the new practitioners and the ordinary people waiting to be saved. They awakened my knowing side and helped me learn about Dafa, and understand my missions and responsibilities. Thank you, Master for saving me! Thank you, veteran practitioners for all your help!
I’ll continue to cultivate diligently with the veteran practitioners and spread the truth, so that more people can wake up from the CCP’s lies, and face a great future. The path of cultivation is very tough, but regardless of how far it is and how long it takes, I’ll follow Master’s guidance, and walk it to the end.
The above is based on my limited level, and if anything is inappropriate, please kindly point it out.