From Being Timid to Fearless

(Minghui.org) I was physically weak and very timid from the time I was a child. Not long after I attained the Fa, the persecution began. I went out to hang up truth clarification posters with other practitioners. Although I had fear in my heart, I didn’t give up. After I got home that day, I could meditate for over an hour and a half. I understood I had acted correctly, and Master encouraged me.

I was later arrested and sent to prison. One time, when we were passing around and reading a new scripture smuggled into the prison by fellow practitioners, a guard showed up. We managed to hide the scripture, but the guard lifted the quilt and found a letter written by a fellow practitioner that read “stop the police from abusing the law while enforcing the law…”

The guard hit that practitioner twice and asked, “What does abusing the law while enforcing the law mean?” I had fear in my heart but I shouted, “What you are doing now is abusing the law!” That guard was shocked, stared at me for a while, then left without saying another word.

Maybe my righteous thoughts overwhelmed the fear at that moment and activated my supernormal ability, which disintegrated the evil factors and made the villain’s mind blank so that he forgot to continue his evildoing. My mind was not quite stable, so I didn’t pass the test 100%. Cultivation is very serious, especially in the devil’s den. Believing in Master and the Fa is not something we just say—it is a firm principle that we have to stick to at every moment in our thoughts and behaviors.

Master said,

“If upon encountering trying circumstances your thinking can be truly righteous, then, when faced with the evil's persecution and when faced with interference, just one sentence of yours fortified with steadfast righteous thoughts can instantly make the evil disintegrate (applause), and it will make those who are being used by the evil turn and flee, it will make the evil's persecution of you dissolve, and it will make the evil's interfering with you disappear without a trace. One thought born of righteous faith is all it takes. And whoever can hold firm that righteous thought and go the distance will become a magnificent god forged by Dafa.” (“Teaching the Fa at the Western U.S. International Fa Conference,” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. VII）

Overcoming Being Afraid

One time, a practitioner did the exercises in full view in the prison. The guards shocked her with electric batons. We heard her screaming and the sounds of beating and electric shocks from far away. I was afraid, especially of the sound of the electric baton, but I thought, “Dafa practitioners are one body. I must stop it!”

I banged on the door. The guard opened it and asked, “What are you doing?” I said, “You are not allowed to persecute Dafa practitioners! Not allowed!” The guards called the criminal inmates to drag me away, cursed a bit, but stopped the violence. It was absolutely not because I had done anything special. However, when my thoughts were up to par at a certain level, Master reinforced me and stopped the violence.

Master said, “Cultivation depends on one’s own efforts, while the transformation of gong is done by one’s master.” (Lecture One, Zhuan Falun)

One day after dinner, I saw a big female inmate riding on a practitioner, slamming her, and beating her. Everyone who saw it just lowered their heads and walked away. I also felt some fear at the thought of confronting such a big woman, but she was hurting a practitioner! I shouted, “Stop your violence!” Stunned, the inmate turned and saw me. She stopped, stood up, and left.

I enlightened that the function of righteous thoughts is especially apparent in evil environments and that one righteous thought has a big effect.

In prison, “fear” is the greatest obstacle for practitioners. When we negatively endure the persecution, our mentality is at the same level as everyday people, our supernormal abilities are not activated, and the bad people and old forces can hurt us. But how can they hurt gods?

Later, Master’s new scripture “The Foretelling” was smuggled to us:

“…The Dafa disciplesascend to the highest heavensAnd, presiding over Heaven and Earth,rectify the human realm” (“The Foretelling,” Hong Yin, Volume II)

After reading this, I enlightened that Dafa practitioners could entirely erase the evil in the human realm. I was very encouraged, and my heart was filled with courage. I felt I was huge and unstoppable, and my heart also calmed down.

Keeping the Heart Pure and Unaffected

The day after I read that new poem, the guards announced that every inmate had to attend a certain meeting. I kept my heart pure and unaffected and firmly said, “I won’t go!” When the inmates assigned to monitor me reported that to the guards, they said, “She [referring to me] can be an exception. Except for her, all the others must go. If somebody doesn’t want to go, hold her and force her to go!” I felt the power of strong thoughts without fear once again.

From then on, I never cooperated with the evil authorities. Even if I couldn’t entirely let go of the fear in some situations, I still let rationality guide my behavior. My righteous thoughts became stronger and stronger in the process, and the attachment of fear gradually weakened.

I was determined to keep improving based on the breakthroughs that I had made. I planned to do the exercises in a dignified manner. When the inmates who watched me tried their best to stop me, I did them when they were resting, changing shifts, or paying no attention to me.

There was a big tree in the yard, and I would meditate under its boughs after dinner. I spoke to the tree: “Please protect Dafa practitioners. When I reach Consummation, our Master will save you and send you to a good destination.” I felt the tree was excited and its leaves were shaking.

“Transformed” Practitioner Commits Crimes

I meditated there for many days. A former practitioner who had been “transformed” discovered where I was and reported me. The whole line of trees was chopped down the next day. Searchlights were installed on all corners of the yard.

When a new attempt to “transform” us was initiated, they ordered all the practitioners to go to a meeting that was attended by all levels of officials from the political and judiciary organizations.

When a former practitioner who’d betrayed Dafa and had been “transformed” was propagating her crooked understandings at the podium, a practitioner stood up and recited “On Dafa” loudly. The guards swarmed all over her, hit her, and dragged her away. When the “transformed” person started to speak again, another practitioner stood up and recited “On Dafa,” so the guards rushed over and dragged her away by her hair. Then another one stood up, then another...

The field of righteous thoughts shook the evil. The meeting couldn’t continue. Every test is an opportunity to have us improve. When it is over, the same opportunity won’t come again.

No Second Chances

Those practitioners who bravely stood up were left hot out in the sun in the daytime, placed in solitary confinement, and deprived of sleep at night. My attachment of fear returned, so I didn’t stand up. But after I saw them being tortured day after day, I couldn’t wait and thought it had to stop! At breakfast, I shouted in the yard, “Release the Dafa practitioners in solitary confinement right away! If not, we will go on a hunger strike!” Everyone heard me. Over 10 practitioners began the hunger strike with me, and those who were confined separately joined us.

After two weeks, the guards began to force-feed us. Later on, they released the practitioners in solitary confinement. Right at that time, Master’s new scripture “The Disciples’ Magnificence” was smuggled in.

Master said,

“Dafa disciples are magnificent, because what you are cultivating is the ultimate Great Fa of the cosmos, because you have validated Dafa with righteous thoughts, and because you have not fallen during the massive tribulation.” (“The Disciples’ Magnificence,” Essentials for Further Advancement II )

We were all excited and realized what we did was correct.

Old Forces Take Advantage of Loopholes

After I was released, because I couldn’t let go of the attachments to fame, profit, and sentimentality, my loopholes were taken advantage of by the old forces.

One morning, when I got up and was about to do the exercises, I felt very weak, had a severe stomachache, and was sweating all over. A thought came to me: “I am dying. Call someone quickly.” But I immediately realized that that thought did not come from my mind and that I should negate it at once. I then thought, “I am a Dafa practitioner who has been cultivating for many years. How can I be in this state? I am protected by Master, the pains and this thought are not mine, I have no illness! Master, please save me!”

When the pains got worse, I thought of my son, mother, and husband. I soon negated that thought as well. Everyday people cannot get rid of the suffering of departing and death, but I am a Dafa practitioner, and I only walk the path arranged by Master!

Just as Master said,

“We have said that good or bad comes from a person’s initial thought, and the thought at that moment can bring about different consequences.” (Lecture One, Zhuan Falun)

When my thoughts were up to par, I saw something like a black shutter door suddenly fall down in front of me. All the symptoms were gone, as if nothing had ever been wrong with me.

During over 20 years of cultivation, I have experienced the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) persecution and many ordeals and tests of life and death. It is because of my firm belief in Master and Dafa—and on Master’s merciful protection—that I have been able to face and pass them all. When I recall all this, I think it is a miracle that someone as timid as I could overcome all those dangers and steadily cultivate up to today.

Thank you, Master, for your benevolent reinforcement and salvation that has made me fearless in the face of the evil. Thanks to Master for his great blessings!