Dafa Changed My Ill-Fated Relationship with My Husband

(Minghui.org) I have been married to my husband for 13 years and we have been the couple that everyone admired. However, before cultivating Falun Dafa, we bickered and quarreled with each other every day. 

I was only 20 years old when I got married and many things were new to me. I was very pampered, being the youngest in my family. I never did any household chores, let alone know how to be affectionate and caring for others. On top of everything, my mother spoiled me. I became a girl who couldn’t stand being corrected and would burst into tears whenever I would get reprimanded. 

A relative of mine tried matchmaking me with a man. She told me that both of his parents are Falun Dafa practitioners and were very compassionate people. My mother was quite happy with this arrangement and even told me, “My dear daughter, I rest assured knowing that you won’t be bullied by your in-laws.”

After we got married, I realized that our personalities were total opposites. I’d often argue with him and was very unforgiving. His arms were full of bruises from my pinches and I’d even purposely turn up the volume on the television so he wouldn’t be able to fall asleep. I would think to myself, “It’s your fault for making me so angry and since I’m still angry, you’ll have to suffer with me, too!”

My husband drives a truck and is mostly on the road. He only comes home every two or four weeks. I would never call him and as the Chinese saying goes: “A word is too much when there’s no seeing eye to eye.” I overheard someone saying one should be careful with a truck driver since they are often caught having affairs with other women. I started to become worried and eventually persuaded myself to be nicer to my husband. However, this idea of “treating my husband nicer” wasn’t what I genuinely wanted to do and my husband saw through my sham gestures of kindness.

I’d treat him nicely for one or two days before my true self emerged and then we’d start arguing. It got so bad that I even cursed at my mother-in-law one day. My husband got even angrier and began hitting me. I used this as an excuse and threw a tantrum while laying on the floor. My mother-in-law convinced me to get up and I said, “I am leaving now. I can’t stand living with my husband anymore.”

It was already nighttime and while I was getting ready to leave. My mother-in-law told my husband to chase me and bring me back home. My mother-in-law said, “Don’t be angry over petty things. We need to be calm whenever we encounter a problem. Let me give you a suggestion: We should always think about others and you should use compassion to move your husband. Violence will not solve anything.” 

I told my mother-in-law that I did not have any compassion. My mother-in-law said, “I am a Falun Dafa cultivator and I adhere to the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. I will remain unaffected and calm upon encountering a dilemma. If I hadn’t practiced Falun Dafa, I would not have been able to tolerate you and would even have hit you. However, I know this is not right since I have a belief now. I should not be like you.”

I thought, “The Chinese Communist Party (CCP) is telling people that Falun Dafa is not good and that Falun Dafa practitioners self-immolate. To me, that sounded like a hoax because my mother-in-law is the complete opposite of what the CCP said. She thinks of others and would rather be wronged herself. This made me very curious as to what is written in Dafa books. What can cause a person to change so drastically? I wanted to read Dafa books as well. 

I felt that the Fa was very good the first time I read it. It teaches people to be good and to be a better person in society. I started to study the Fa every day and learned to think of my husband. I would prepare a tub of hot water for him to soak his feet when he came home from work. I didn’t argue with him like before and if we had different opinions about something, I’d wait for everyone to leave and then tell him my opinion in private; he became more receptive to me as a result. If there was any farm work that needed to be done during autumn, I’d also help my in-laws voluntarily. The villagers all praised me, saying I was very filial.

I thought to myself: I would not be like this had I not practiced Falun Dafa. Falun Dafa has taught me how to be a better person and treat others with compassion. My husband also changed for the better when he saw the changes in me. He is more willing to communicate and discuss things with me.

My husband bought me two qipao (a Chinese traditional dress that originated from the Manchurians). I was so happy that I tried it on multiple times. My husband said, “Look at you happily trying it on so many times.” I said, “I want to try it on so I can return to traditional culture.” I know both my husband and I have changed. I need to do better in the future and abide by the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance at all times. 

I wanted to share my story with everyone and hope that sentient beings can understand the truth of Falun Dafa.