(Minghui.org) Thanks to my grandmother's influence I grew up believing in karmic retribution so I avoided doing bad things. My parents divorced when I was in middle school and my mother became a Christian. I attended church to make her happy.
I gradually came to believe that gods existed. I moved away from atheism and the “theory of evolution” taught in school. Even though I went on to teach politics, my belief in God never wavered.
One of my coworkers practiced Falun Dafa and we often shared our understandings of the world around us. I became interested in the principles he talked about and wanted to read the book Zhuan Falun, so he lent it to me. When I read Lecture One I especially noticed the following sentence:
“The entire cultivation process for a cultivator is one of constantly giving up human attachments.” (Lecture One, Zhuan Falun)
Even though I didn't yet understand what it meant to cultivate oneself, I believed in God and longed for higher spiritual realms. As I read Master's words, I realized I had found the way to reach higher realms – a ladder to spiritual enlightenment.
I was so excited when I obtained my own copy of Zhuan Falun. I eagerly read it and asked my coworker to teach me the exercises. As soon as I started practicing, however, the CCP's (Chinese Communist Party) persecution of Falun Dafa began.
The Persecution Begins
All the TV channels continually broadcast propaganda slandering Dafa, and my school began holding events to discredit the practice.
Initially I didn't realize these were all lies, but I clearly knew that Zhuan Falun teaches people to be good by following Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. There is nothing wrong with that. But no one could explain why the persecution was taking place.
My supervisor came to my home and asked me to hand over my Dafa books. I refused to do it and gave him all kinds of reasons. He was a kindhearted person and didn't force me. He said his superior told him to do it.
My fellow practitioner coworker (who taught me the exercises) was illegally arrested by the local police. I visited him accompanied by my colleagues. At the time I did not realize the CCP was behind all of this. I just thought the police were doing evil.
I was lost. Going out to practice was prohibited, and all I could do was read the book at home. I followed the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance in my daily life.
Besides teaching politics, I was the head teacher. I treated each student as if they were my own child. One parent brought me handmade pancakes and homegrown vegetables to show her appreciation.
I never accepted gifts or money from parents. This family was very poor and made a living from selling these pancakes and vegetables. If I refused the gifts her feelings would be hurt, so I accepted and later gave her money. I told her, “You are making a living with these things, I cannot just take them. I appreciate your kindness, but you must accept my money.” She understood.
Even though I was isolated from other practitioners, I strove to live by Falun Dafa's principles.
Stepping Forward
When I attended a teaching seminar in 2003, I heard someone talk about Falun Dafa publicly for the first time in four years. The lecturer said, “The CCP's persecution of Falun Dafa is illegal.” I was shocked.
In front of more than 100 politics teachers, he openly and bravely spoke about the illegal actions of the Communist Party. I admired him so much. He was only 29 but he fearlessly spoke the truth.
I began to wake up and realized the CCP was violating the law. Falun Dafa practitioners had done nothing wrong. I later obtained some truth-clarification materials and understood that the “Tiananmen Self-immolation” was staged.
By chance I ran into a fellow practitioner who told me about Master's lectures given after 1999. I learned that practitioners should do the three things well: study the Fa and do the exercises, send forth righteous thoughts, and clarify the truth to people.
I began clarifying the facts to my family, friends, coworkers and some strangers. Many people understood that the CCP's persecution of Falun Dafa was illegal, and agreed to quit the CCP and its affiliated organizations; some even quit with their real names. At the time, my level of truth-clarification was just letting people know the persecution was illegal.
In the competitive environment in China all parents want their children to attend prep classes. I did not recommend any prep classes to my students, but the training institutions typically paid kickbacks to the head teachers anyway.
At first, I refused the kickbacks, but then I noticed my coworkers were looking at me strangely. I understood what was going on and took the money when the other teachers were present, but then give it back in private.
I told them, “I'm a Falun Dafa practitioner. I cannot take your money. Master taught us to be good people and follow the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance.” I clarified the facts to them and persuaded them to quit the Party and its affiliated organizations.
I've experienced some amazing things. For example, I rode my bicycle to work every day, and every traffic light went green all the way to school. I rode so effortlessly that my coworkers said it looked like I was flying.
When I’m shopping, however many vegetables I place on the scale is exactly the weight I asked for. The vendors often said, “That's remarkable! You must come here often!” I actually didn't.
When I teach, what I present often hasn't been prepared ahead of time but just comes out naturally and the effect is very good. All this validates how wonderful Falun Dafa is.
As time went on I learned how evil the CCP's persecution of practitioners is, including harvesting practitioners' organs while they're alive! I understood the CCP is dragging mankind to hell, and why practitioners clarify the truth to people and save them. It's our responsibility to make sure that people aren't implicated for the CCP’s crimes.
After I understood all these facts I asked my mother to practice Falun Dafa, but she said, “I've seen how wonderful Falun Dafa is and I admire practitioners, but I've believed in Christianity for over 20 years. I cannot just convert immediately. Give me some time.”
I was happy and thought she would begin practicing soon. However, a week later she had a stroke and passed away. My sadness was beyond words. I made up my mind: I must cultivate well.
My mother's passing greatly affected me, but I didn't realize it. I was immersed in the sorrow and endless guilt of losing her. This was an attachment to sentimentality. I gradually slacked off in my cultivation.
I still read the Fa, but I no longer did the exercises every day. I also slowed down in truth-clarification. I knew my cultivation state was bad, but I didn't have the power or will to change it.
It wasn't until the CCP Virus (coronavirus) broke out that I suddenly realized how serious the problem was if a Fa-rectification period Dafa practitioner failed to do the three things well. If I continued behaving like this, I would be following the old forces' arrangements and Master's salvation would be wasted.
I realized that the old forces arranged everything I was doing to have me destroyed! But Master did not give up on me. I know I wasted so many years. I must step out and save people.
My residential complex was under quarantine and it was difficult to get out. Even if I did, there would be few people on the streets! I keenly felt that time was running out and I missed saving many people. I knew I must do something!
Master saw my heart for saving people, and hinted that I use the Internet. I had limited apps on my cell phone because I had uninstalled WeChat, Weibo and QQ upon Minghui's notice a couple of years ago. The only thing I had left was an online shopping app called Taobao.
I downloaded truth-clarification videos from Minghui and shared them in many groups. I also left messages to remind people to watch them. When I finished doing this I felt pressure from a kind of fear, a feeling I hadn't experienced even during the most intense persecution in 1999.
I said, “I'm a Fa-rectification period Dafa disciple. I am doing the most righteous thing. No one is allowed to persecute me.” I immediately thought, ‘Master has said not to acknowledge the old forces' persecution. Why would I acknowledge the persecution?’
I started sending forth righteous thoughts to eliminate the “fear” as it was not me. It was a bad substance the old forces were forcing on me. Master negates the old forces, why would I acknowledge their existence?!
Now everything is behind me, and I have won the battle. My heart is light and peaceful. I cannot see other dimensions, but I know my righteous thoughts have come back. Master has removed the bad substances for me.
I remembered what Master wrote in his poem, “The Master-Disciple Bond”:
“Four years has the wild evil surgedA steady helm has assured the right courseThe Disciples of Fa have gone through evil trialsAnd though great the pressure, their wills are unbowedThere is no affect between master and discipleThe Buddha’s grace remolds Heaven and EarthWhen disciples have ample righteous thoughtsMaster has the power to turn back the tide”
(Hong Yin Vol. II, Translation Version A)
Thank you, Master!
Now I can go out, approach strangers and clarify the facts to them. With Master's teachings and Dafa, I will walk my path with strong righteous thoughts.
