(Minghui.org) My mother was very strict with me when I was young. She would either scold me or beat me. I disliked her very much.
A Strict Mom
I started to practice Falun Dafa at the age of 22, together with my mom. We would get up early every morning to do the exercises, and study the Fa in the evening. Thus, we had a common interest, and sat together talking endlessly. But my mom's strictness with me didn’t change.
I had to get up to do the exercises every morning at around 4:00 a.m. Every time I looked at the darkness through the window from my warm quilt, I really felt that I was suffering! If I failed to turn up to do the exercises, I would have to see my mom’s unhappy face, and speak to her very cautiously. If I got up and followed her, she would smile all day long and pamper me.
My mom and I attended our Fa-study group no matter what. We talked and laughed every day, always feeling very happy. As my mom didn’t receive any education, she didn’t even know how to write her own name, but after studying the Fa she could read every word in the Dafa books. She has persisted in practicing Falun Dafa every day.
My Family Faces the Persecution with Ease
Since the start of the persecution of Falun Dafa in July 1999, my mom and I have experienced various forms of persecution. We were arrested in Beijing when we appealed for Dafa. We have been imprisoned, kept in a brainwashing center, and our house has been ransacked and our property confiscated.
When my younger brother was about to get married in 2002, I was locked up in a brainwashing center and my mom was held in a detention center. Only by my family asking an influential person to help, were we able to attend my brother’s wedding.
We were escorted to my brother’s wedding by four or five policemen. The other wedding guests looked at us strangely. I couldn’t stand it and, with tears in my eyes, I thought, “Whatever have we done to deserve this? Why do we have to suffer so much humiliation?”
My mom was looking at everyone attending the wedding, trying to hold a smile. When my father was making a speech his voice was loud and clear. I was fully aware that Master was giving him the energy.
My father, who does not practice Falun Dafa, was under great pressure. My parents worked in the same workplace. While my mom was detained, all of the management in their workplace repeatedly harassed my dad.
Faith in Dafa Wavers
Our family was forced to move to another city to avoid further harassment from the authorities. I couldn't bear the situation any longer, and stopped practicing Falun Dafa.
My mom has never been shaken in her belief in Dafa. She was disappointed in me, and tried to persuade me to come back to Dafa multiple times. But I was like a lost child who couldn’t find their way home. After I married, I had a child and led an ordinary life.
One year, Udumbara flowers blossomed twice on the glass of my door. The flowers that blossomed the second time started to turn green, then gray, and finally they became black and withered away. I thought that it was strange, and asked my mom, “How did they become black?”
My mom replied, “Master doesn't want to give you up and gives you a hint. Opportunities are slipping away because you are not diligent in cultivation.”
Encouraging Each Other
With Master's compassion and my mom's constant encouragement, I finally resumed my cultivation in Dafa. My mom and I have been improving together by encouraging each other.
When coming across any problems, we sit down and look within. We often go out together to hang truth clarification banners and put up posters. Sometimes we cannot regard each other as fellow practitioners and look at situations as a mother and daughter. This can lead to disputes when working together.
I was really angry at times. And with human notions, we couldn’t get good results. That’s why some of the banners couldn’t be hung properly and some would fall into a ditch. After returning home, we would sit down and look inward, trying to find our attachments.
Still Being Disciplined
Because I am still catching up in cultivation, I have many attachments that I find difficult to remove. But my mom would always reprimand me for my actions.
Sometimes, when my mom sees me kiss my child she would say, “This is human affection!” While watching TV with my child at home, she would tell me that I am seeking homely comforts.
I took my child sightseeing one weekend. My mom called me, and wanted to know where we were and what we were doing. When I told her that I was out enjoying myself with my child, she was furious and said, “You're not doing what you should do,” and then hung up.
I know that my mom is worried that I will be unable to keep up with the pace of Fa-rectification, but sometimes I feel really annoyed with her “supervising” me this way.
When my endurance reached the limit, I would shout at her. Afterwards I would feel regret for what I had done, as I didn’t behave like a practitioner. My attachments are revealed from these explosive episodes. Master allows me to find these attachments so that I can remove them.
Taking Every Opportunity to Clarify the Facts
I do admire my mom from the bottom of my heart. When we go shopping together she also talks to people about Falun Dafa and quitting the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) and its affiliated organizations.
While shopping for shoes one time, the shop assistant quit the CCP after talking with my mom. After paying for the clothes I bought at another shop I would see my mom talking to the sales assistant. In comparing myself to my mom, I feel ashamed because of my fear in talking to people about Dafa, which is also an attachment I need to remove.
When my mom told me that Falun Dafa practitioners were filing criminal complaints against Jiang Zemn, the former leader of the CCP, for initiating the persecution of Falun Dafa, I immediately became scared. I felt that there was no way that I could do this as I had the painful experience of being persecuted before.
However, after constant Fa study I questioned myself: “This persecution was started by Jiang, so why wouldn’t I dare to sue him?”
Then, together with my mom, I started to write a complaint letter. My dad then joined us, as we can never forget how our whole family suffered at that time.
Making Truth Clarification Materials
Encouraged by my mom, I have started to make truth clarification materials. Every time I complete making a booklet, on seeing the clear, beautiful patterns and words, I feel that I am doing the most positive thing in the universe. I have set up a standard for myself that every booklet I give out must be beautiful, clear and neat.
On the road of cultivation, my mom, a fellow practitioner accompanies me. Not every practitioner will have such a blessing. It is Master who has arranged that such a practitioner helps and encourages me. I am grateful to Master for not giving up on me!
