Let Go of Ego and Happiness Will Follow
(Minghui.org) I am a veteran Falun Gong practitioner who started to cultivate in 1997. When the persecution started, I didn’t join the Fa rectification efforts for three years. In 2002, I started to catch up and really understood how to look inward. Since then, I have realized the urgency of remaining diligent and helping to save people.
Look Within and Be Considerate of Others
My first test was improving family relationships. Just days before July 20th, the anniversary of the start of the persecution, it was rainy and storming. Although we had planned to go out in the evening to clarify the truth, we practitioners decided not to go after all because of the weather.
This was actually a test for me, and I decided to go despite the weather. July 20th, a memorable day for us, only comes once a year. If I didn’t do anything to validate Dafa that day, how could I face Master and those practitioners who had lost their lives in the persecution? I knew I had to step out the front door!
But my husband stopped me: “You're stupid! It's such bad weather, and you would be on your own. What are you going to do? I won’t let you go. You just cannot go!” He locked the door. Although I didn't argue with him, I was not convinced. So I laid down on my bed and kept quiet.
Ten minutes passed, and my husband asked me to get up. I didn't answer. Twenty minutes passed, and he again asked me to get up. I still didn't reply. He eventually lost his cool: “Well, I will stay out of it. Please keep warm, take an umbrella, and go do whatever you want!”
I immediately got up, “Thank you very much!” I got dressed and walked out with my umbrella. Facing such a storm, I had no fear at all. In hindsight, I felt that I was not so friendly to my husband. I had focused too much on what I wanted and didn’t consider him. I should have clarified the truth about Falun Gong to him to gain his understanding and support. Sometime later, and on more than one occasion, I successfully clarified the truth to him. He then fully understood what my mission was.
One evening his elder sister visited us while I was out. She told my husband, “You should keep her on a leash. How can a woman always run outside at night?” My husband responded, “What she does is righteous. She wouldn’t be so kind to me if she didn't practice Falun Gong! I’ve always been in poor health, ever since I was a child, and I can’t do anything physical. But she never looks down on me; instead she treats me well.” His sister left without saying anything.
It is true that if I hadn't practiced Falun Gong, I would have felt extremely sad about hanging around a man with such ill-health. I wouldn’t have treated him nicely. It has been really good to practice Falun Gong! Now I have a happy family!
My family is a little complicated. My older brother and sister are my half-siblings from my mother’s previous marriage. My mother’s first husband died in the Tangshan Earthquake. She then married my dad, and I was born later.
When I was 19 years old, I noticed that my mom’s health improved dramatically after practicing Falun Gong. As a result, I decided to practice it, too. In July 1999, when the persecution was began, my father died of extreme fear. He and his father had both practiced traditional Chinese Medicine, so they left behind medical books that were considered very valuable.
My half-brother and half-sister asked my mother if they could inherit those medical books. But my mother insisted that my dad’s books should be passed down to me.
Their unexpected request upset me, and I saw that I was attached to wealth and material things. I started to study Master’s Fa:
“Of course, you won’t be told when tribulations or conflicts are coming. If you were told everything, how would you cultivate? That would defeat the purpose.” (“The Fourth Talk” from Zhuan Falun)
I suddenly realized that I was a Falun Gong practitioner and wondered why was I behaving like an ordinary person. I tried to search within, layer by layer, for my attachments. I found that I attached to my own interests, to not being convinced, to feeling wronged, to resentment, to fighting, and to selfishness. But when it came to letting go of those things, I felt it was extremely difficult.
One day, my mother sought my consent to pass down those books to my half-siblings. Seeing her suffering and looking helpless, I thought, “Be friendly and unselfish.” At that moment, Master’s Fa came to mind:
“If you are always compassionate and friendly to others, if you always consider other people when you do things, and whenever you have issues with other people you first think about whether they can take it or whether it will cause them harm, then you won’t have any problem.” (“The Fourth Talk” from Zhuan Falun)
Suddenly, all my selfish attachments were dissolved and compassion naturally arose.
I said to my mom, “Don’t you worry! Please pass down my dad’s medical books to whoever asks for them. I won’t argue over them.” Hearing this, Mother was too excited to speak, and her eyes were full of tears.
I smiled, “Mom, I practice Dafa. That makes me the happiest person in the world. What more should I seek?” That was how the dispute over my dad’s medical books was resolved. I let go of fame and self-interest and also let go of my ego. I felt that practicing Falun Gong made me really joyful!
Good Things or Bad Things, They Are All Positive
Two years ago, the coordinators in our area were frequently replaced. The first coordinator was a veteran practitioner named Hu. He gave up the position when he moved to another area. Later, practitioners Chen, Gong, and I took over the responsibility. However, we often disagreed among ourselves. This hindered the effectiveness of work in the area, so we eventually asked Hu to come back. This caused friction among the practitioners, which made me want to avoid them for a period of time.
I studied the Fa and calmed myself down. I felt that, whatever work I do, I should always follow what Master has taught us: to cooperate well with other practitioners and to do well with the three things Dafa practitioners should do.
When the movement to “sue Jiang” first started, Hu communicated with other practitioners every day regarding what we should do. We encouraged and helped each other to get the documents ready, posted, and delivered. During the process, Hu was very dedicated and really played a major role.
Nine months passed, and Hu again asked us to take over the role of coordinating. I was upset and said, “How come you always do whatever you like?” My first thought was to look outward, to find the defects of others and to not see their good points.
Later, the other two coordinators shared with me, “What is it that Master wants? How should we support each other?” Suddenly my heart was open, and all the grievances in my unbalanced mind went away. I blurted out, “Good things or bad things, they are all positive.”
On the surface level, it seemed that we three coordinators didn’t cooperate well. On the other hand, Hu did play an important role in preparing documents to sue Jiang. Besides, in the process, I found and removed many of my human attachments and notions: resentment, jealousy, ego, excluding others, and looking down on others. Wasn't this a very positive thing? Just as Master teaches us:
“Do you realize that as long as you’re a cultivator, in any environment or under any circumstances, I will use any troubles or unpleasant things you come across—even if they involve work for Dafa, or no matter how good or sacred you think they are—to eliminate your attachments and expose your demon-nature so that it can be eliminated, for your improvement is what’s most important.” (“Further Understanding” from Essentials for Further Advancement)
The process itself turned out to be a really very positive thing! After letting go of ego, I felt relaxed and happy!
Thank you, Master, very much for saving me!
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